Excellent and funny stuff! Keep up the good work.
Excellent and funny stuff! Keep up the good work.
People dislike FFIX because they're horrible idiots. - Kawaii Ryűkishi
"One-Winged Angel" is far and away the best final boss song ever
composed. - Kawaii Ryűkishi
This is great, can't wait for part 4.
O god I do hope soTO BE CONTINUED! (you spoony bard!)
There is no signature here. Move along.
You actually neglected "attack while mist will freeze with breath"? Why?
This is a good example of why FFIV deserves its own forum.
"Watch out terrorists, it's George W. Bush! I mean Titan!"
This series is pure class. Very nice, Necronopticous.
I'm guessing it's based on the original "Easytype" version of FFIV? I've seen a few differences to the Anthology version I've played.
Yes, it's based on Easytype AKA Final Fantasy 2
They're getting better and better!
MORE!
FF2US is NOT FFIV Easytype. Easytype is even more dumbed down and has a different sprite for Zeromus.
Jeez, they're close enough.
I want more
"oh well, wherever whever you are. Iron maiden's, gonna get you, no matter how far. See the blood flow, whatchin it shed, up above my head. Iron Maiden, will watch you again!"
Brilliant.
Proud to be the Unofficial Secret Illegal Enforcer of Eyes on Final Fantasy!
When I grow up, I want to go toBovineTrump University! - Ralph Wiggum
Episode IV - "If only he were as smart as he is weak"
Well, as you can clearly tell from the climax of the last episode, Tellah is too angry to continue traveling with you. But his leaving really goes to show you... With the loss of every angry old man with amnesia comes a vehicle that allows you to cross water that has three pointy rocks sticking out.
Well, we'd all really like to get to stopping the evil Golbez and his Republican Wings, but first thing's first, we have to save Rosa from the evil clutches of the horrible desert fever! I think desert fever was supposed to symbolically suggest that she slept around with members of the Taliban.
Once you reach the lair of Antlion you'll realize that Edward does exactly the same thing as Rydia in battle. Gets knocked out continuously. Best to just hack away with Cecil and let the two useless weaklings stay dead until the end.
Since Edward has been dead since the very first enemy encounter in the cave, he'll have to remind you at the very end that you're in the lair of Antlion. Well thanks for the info Captain Obvious.
I guess the idea was to show you that Edward is just like pretty boy singers nowadays. Completely and totally clueless.
Well I guess Antlion is tame if your definition of tame is big red aggressive freaky horned cockeyed beasts that want to devour you with a gross looking toothed oriface in their face.
If Final Fantasy IV had voice acting they would have definately gotten Mr. T to play Antlion. YES he's THAT aggressive. Anyway, surprise surprise If you sit there guess how much damage Antlion will do to Cecil? That's right, 1 hp. Guess how much he'll do to Rydia and Edward? If you said 5 gazillion you're absolutely correct. If you decide to actually attack Antlion, be prepared, he counters with a move that does exactly the same thing that takes 1 hp, but for some reason it takes like 30 hp, even from Cecil. That's right, a 2900% increase.
Call Chocobos and slice Antlion while drinking potions like a freak until he's defeated. Before heading out you'll have a nice informative talk amongst yourselves.
This must be one of Cecil's special abilities he was taught in Baron's Dark Knight training program: The ability to answer someone's question with a phrase that is totally unrelated without anyone realizing it.
Classmate: Hey Cecil, what's the square root of 8?
Cecil: There is a bed in my room.
Classmate: Ah! Got it, thanks man!
After you're finished here, head back to town to save Rosa!
There's something wrong with this picture. I thought the idea of curing her was so I didn't have to listen to this crap anymore?
I'm sorry. For my. Overuse. Of the period. Now who are you sleeping with!? I always sensed such a jealous overtone to this conversation. I also always get the feeling Rosa just made up this whole damn illness. Maybe it's the "I'm-so-not-a-real-sickness" symptoms, maybe it's the fact that rubies don't cure sicknesses, even if they are guarded by aggressive sand-beasts.
Or maybe it's just the horrible job Rosa does at fake-coughing after she's already "cured"
If you don't really hate Edward, well... You should. Square knew this, and decided that if he's going to persist as a character in the game something HAS to be done. Therefore you get a useless scene to basically illustrate that Edward plays such bad music it is capable of killing foul demons.
YES!
Kill the BushHag!
I find it funny that of the two characters on screen beside Edward, only one comes from the water, and that's Anna. "I believe in you Edward! Your music is so horrible it does physical damage to the enemy and occasionally lulls them to sleep!"
Maybe it wasn't the bombings that killed Anna afterall...
TO BE CONTINUED!
(Can't think of anything witty or clever.)
Last edited by Necronopticous; 11-06-2004 at 07:42 AM.
Still going strong.
I'm tempted to Sticky this thread, but this forum is already rather full of Stickies.
I'm pretty sure it'll be generating enough posts to keep it at the top of the forum, anyway, and you can bet it'll be getting archived once the story is over.
I absoluty love this. You're doing a great job.
Moogle:
1. Catlike creature. Has a large red ball on it's head attached by a long hair. Some can fly. Some can fight. Some are lazy bastards. All say Kupo (or Puu)
Dude, keep 'em coming. These rock my socks.
*wipes tears from corners of eyes* :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:
Man.....this is wonderful stuff....
lol pretty funny, I like episode 3 "youll want to put your hand in the fire place before you leave....OUCH!!!" lol XD
oh yeah keeps getting better
"oh well, wherever whever you are. Iron maiden's, gonna get you, no matter how far. See the blood flow, whatchin it shed, up above my head. Iron Maiden, will watch you again!"
I'm definitely enjoying this. Keep up the good work. You'll have a million chapters before you get to the end, but it looks like you're tackling the game at a good pace.
Extremely funny! Keep it up man!
Keep going! This stuff is hilarious!
A wise man once said "Never share your wisdom with annybody."
Another great episode, can't wait for more.
I made a promise to never post anything like "Good job man, I love that stuff", and then put a smile in the end.
But I have no other choice.
Good job man, I love that stuff
...
I've seen the future, brother. It is murder.
This is absolutely wonderful. I can't believe how retarded the translation in the US version is. Thank God I got a fantrans. In conclusion:
MORE! MORE! MORE!
If you think the FFII US translation was bad, play more NES games.
Episode V - "The Empire Strikes Back"
Well, Edward and his overwhelming stupidity have been stealing the spotlight and Cecil doesn't like it, not one little bit. So in order to get things back to normal he breaks us in with another classic moment of emotionally tormenting Rydia.
"fire" must be that new lingo meaning "terrorist attack that I, myself, committed"
Now that Rosa has been "saved" and Edward has proven his manliness to his dead girlfriend and killed a rabid BushHag it's finally time to stop Golbez! FIRST STOP... uhh... A mountain... With a karate man on top... and some bombs.
This karate man will be a great asset to your team due to his permanently inflamed nasal passages that allow him to sneeze on his foes at will. As soon as you meet him you'll be forced into a boss battle against MomBomb.
I'm guessing the idea behind this hideous beast's name was that he/she's the "mother of all bombs" although the name doesn't really suggest that at all. MomBomb can be tough if you don't put Yang's ancient mucus technique to good use. Covering Mombomb with snot is an assured win in this battle. A flying dragon kick couldn't hurt either.
Yang begins his emotionally moving story about how his training buddies were just murdered by bombs but Cecil, being the complete and total asshole that he is, uses his famed "this-has-nothing-to-do-with-what-you're-saying" phrase technique.
"My friends and I were ambushed and..."
"Yeah, cool, whatever, we're going to Fabul"
Cecil is already scared of losing the focus of the story progression again to the karate master Yang so he makes a pre-emptive blow at Rydia this time.
Cecil doesn't want Yang to be any more important than himself although he does realize that Yang has great (and unusual) powers and thus forces him to join the party. Yang is told that, if he refuses, Cecil will hold him down and spray decongestant in his nostrils rendering his lifetime of nasal-kung-fu training utterly useless.
After you're finished on the mountain, head to Fabul as you originally planned. You can do lots of interesting things in Fabul that no person in their right mind would want to pass up. Start out by talking to this young man:
Sounds like a great idea little fella, however... It would be of a little help if you explained just who in the hell you were talking about you randomly violent little son of a...
Next pay a visit to Yang's wife
Ah... Just the response I expected.
Anyway, if you're feeling spent you can catch some Z's in the least likely of places.
This speaker of this troublemaking piece of dialogue insisted that he/she remain anonymous. My money is on Cecil, that bastard.
After you're done causing trouble in Fabul, go have a chat with the King.
I don't see how this King gets anything accomplished responding to everything he discovers by screaming "Truly!?" at the top of his lungs. No, we were just pulling your leg King, you fell for it.
Why bother? I'm pretty sure Cecil could hold off any enemy force with his spelling and grammar mistakes alone.
After an intense battle against the invading enemy force, the team is forced to the last stronghold to protect the crystal from Golbez, the crystal room itself. Kain will now make his first appearance since the terrorist attack at Village Mist.
Playing through this scene is almost like playing Final Fantasy IV on a foreign rom, you just kind of have to put together what's happening through the pictures rather than the text because it's completely nonsensical.
And just when you thought it couldn't be worse.
Stunning entrance. Chills my bones every time I see it.
Well, needless to say, Kain bitchslaps Cecil, takes the crystal and also kidnaps Rosa. After all of the things that Cecil's already accomplished I'm not even impressed.
Before Golbez and his gang left with their loot they tortured the King of Fabul by reading off a whole list of fun facts. The King now suffers from severe laryngitis. The Queen thinks he may never be able to scream "Truly!?" ever again. But she does show great confidence in the King's ability to overcome it.
Hmm, actually I take back what I just said. I'm not so sure this is confidence, it could just be bad writing...
Yeah... Bad writing.
TO BE CONTINUED!
(Truly!?)
Last edited by Necronopticous; 11-16-2004 at 10:17 PM.
YES! THIS WAS GREAT!
Give me more!!
This is probably going to go down in EoFF - no, Final Fantasy - history as an all-time classic
I can't believe how bad the dialogue is in the original game. I'm glad to own the PSX version.
1000 Views. Glory.
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