Well, the only way I could possibly get a sword would be by magic. Like, say I was walking with my sister outside one lovely spring day, and suddenly a GIANT BULLFROG jumped out of the pond/creek!

Gasp!

So, it would only be natural for a giant lady to appear out of the sky and bestow upon my sister and myself a trident and long sword (respectively) with which to slay this evil amphibian. Why? Because we're virtuous, that's why.