my brother's girlfriend is an ogre

[FoxHoundx25]

my brother dragged home this big hairy smelly ogre like reature named emily a few months back...i was hoping the villagers would drive her off again, but it looks like she's staying........if she would stay away from me i wouldnt care but she does nothing but smell up my house.


Somehow im in the wrong because i should "be nice to her"........her own brother tied her to a tree and tried to burn her at the stake, anyway my question is does anyone else know anybody that fits this discription or am i lucky?

[udsuna]

Honestly, sounds like YOU have the problem here. Seriously, even if you're right, and she IS an ogre... your brother is the one with her, not you. And, really, who are you to judge? If he's happy, then good for him. If he's not, well, you don't need to worry, do you?

And, one of my (now VERY ex) girlfriends tried to make out with my sister... *shudder*. So, count yourself lucky... *shudder*

[TasteyPies]

Does she know Shrek? I've always wanted to meet him!

Edit: Oh, you mean she isn't realy an Ogre just someone who you think isn't atractive? And you make sure everyone knows you think so? I think thats a pretty shallow thing to do and or think.

[Shlup]

Have you nothing to say about her personality? Just that she's "fat" and "smelly"? How shallow of you. I'm disgusted.

[Psychotic]

Get a pitchfork and sharpened sticks. That's how I beat off an ogre that was eating my livestock!


...OK it was just a cat that was in my garden. And I didn't get a pitchfork or sharpened sticks, I just walked towards it and it ran away. But it's the same principle!

[Quina]

I recommend febreeze.

[Meat Puppet]

My advice? When in front of your brother, grab him and give him a passionate kiss. If this doesn't scare her off, at least it leaves an open oppurtunity for threesomes and new experiences.

[eestlinc]

that sounds like a bad bluff, meaty.

[Quina]

You saw Montel today too?

[Meat Puppet]

They don't let me watch television.

[Cybele]

I recommend febreeze.

Yes, febreeze works well. So does lysol. But, after all, your brother might get mad if you're spraying either of these all over the house when she's around.

[The Captain]

Though you may not share your brother's taste in the people he chooses to date, you should still respect him and the person he is with.

Take care all.

[Dr.K]

If they're happy together, then objective numero uno has been fulfilled, and you should be happy for your brother If they're not, then she probably won't be round for much longer - another reason to be happy (in your case).
Conclusion - be happy

[Nod]

Get a pitchfork and sharpened sticks. That's how I beat off an ogre that was eating my livestock!


...OK it was just a cat that was in my garden. And I didn't get a pitchfork or sharpened sticks, I just walked towards it and it ran away. But it's the same principle!

a sound principle at that.

omg dude ur sooooo shallow.
whatever, call the travelling circus and tell them one of their freaks has escaped. they'll be along to pick her up in no time!!!!!

edit: that was a joke

[Harvest Moon]

You wouldn't happen to live in Canada would you?

If so I may know this Emily, though I always accused her best-lesbo friend in da' world of being the one not to bathe..

Then again if you were to asscosiate with someone that had horrible HORRIBLE hygene for a long period of time you may start to smell too i suppse..