I am sorry lordblazer but what you say is totally wrong and would be best classified as a n00b that refuses to learn. The subjob is there to reinforce your main job and help the party out in terms of exp.

Yeah BRD/WHM is a good combo oyu can also do BRD/THF the only difference between the two combos are

BRD/WHM back p healer once done with songs(which is pretty tough sinc eoyu have to keep up with soungs and look at th mob's health to time hwen to do paeon then make sure the mages have ballad then you can backup heal.The big use for it is that if the PT goes into critical you can do something about it and Brds can take a little hate temp.)

BRD/THF(more loot,more gil from fights,a bit of less work on your behalf.People are too opinionated and think that BRD/WHM is a always and a must.I've seen 1 or 2 melee bards me being one but they rarely melee and Bards with this job combo tend to keep up with songs better.)
I have absolutely no problem with keeping songs up along with healing. Many times i would heal after a song is done because it is needed. As well certain fights (vs goblins for example) would be in need of Bar-elemental spells and i would throw those up as well as curing status effects to help save MP from other mages (since BRD mp isnt as critical). Many a time the melee songs Madrigal and Minuet can be casted with reletive ease as well as Prelude. Ballad is an easy thing to do as well and after that? Either Requiem or Threnody and should there be recast timers healing would be a good way to spend your time.

THF would only benefit Gilfinder if you fight beastmen and you dont fight beastmen as often as we should. Loot also is moot in terms of exp parties, we are there for exp and not loot. What if theres another THF? You are just wasting potential. The reason is not to fit into your style but to fit into the parties to make it more efficient. /WHM helps the best whereas a /THF does nothing useful. Meleeing also give TP to the mob which depending on the weapon you use, will be the same you get back per hit +3TP and will make the monster fire off more specials. Now you are hindering the party. What would be more efficient? WHM or THF sub for exp? I am sure you can answer that.

Simply put BRD/WHM and BRD?THF is beneficial for PTs depending on your PT combo.IF theres a BLM and a WHM then BRD/THF will be fine if you have some good DDs and a great tank!
Ah now the party would be EVEN more beneficial with WHM sub if it was the best party isnt it? Of course it doesnt matter what you sub because BRDs get parties anyway regardless since they are not a dime a dozen. But i would invite a /WHM over /THF because i know that will give us less downtime.

BRD/WHM can never be backup healer and its never why we look for a BRD, its for the efficiency the BRD can give us and WHM sub will greatly help in that regard. BRD is all about oiling the gears, and WHM sub is just helping that.

And Sneak Attack for 10 dmg! >_> I am sure that helps...only gets worst as you get higher.

I am a BRD myself at least up to level 31ish and i know how the thing works. As a party leader its not about control freaks, its about the effiency and the benefit of you being the party and sometimes the right sub can either help or hinder the party, and as leader i must consider that when inviting every party member, and i call that responsible. There are overzealous leaders but they dont go beyond Kazham usually.

Oh yeah when i see WAR/WHM i think that they either lack knowledge of the game, read a bad strategy guide, are lazy, or are just trying to go against the "mold" because they can and have no regard to the party they are supposedly joining. A WAR/MNK can solidify hate in two provokes assuming nothing too extreme happens, WAR/MNK pwns all at lower levels and is defintely better than WAR/WHM...being WAR/MNK and having RNGs provoking and not taking hate off me when i am dying is enough to attest to that.

EDIT: But i disgress, sub whatever you want, its not anyone's fault but your own if you get less exp or hurt the party that way. By no means are job combinations totally rigid, however you must have reason that something like a WAR/SMN is totally stupid, compared to a BLM/WHM.