Fantasy Football 2005

[Raistlin]

Go Raiders!

Raiders!

LaMont Jordan has so far been the most consistent points on my team.

[eestlinc]

Why couldn't the Bills give up rushing yards and TDs to Ronnie Brown that week? I guess road games are tough on a defense.

[RSL]

Buffalo always plays better when I don't start them.

[Raistlin]

Dammit. My NYJ upset pick is not off to a very good start. Who would've thought Atlanta could play run defense?

[Del Murder]

<b>ENFORCERS FIRE COACH</b>

<i>Associated Press</i>

In a shocking move, the Oakland Enforcers have fired head coach Del Murder after a 2-5 start. Del, who led the team to two championships in the last three years, had been having some off-field issues which brought his focus into question. Coming under fire for the recent benching of Kerry Collins, and the controversial decision to stick with Miami defense against the Kansas City running game, management decided to make a move. After starting 2-1, the Enforcers have lost 4 straight, losing most recently to the mediocre Burning Legion. 'We're gonna miss coach,' said running back Rudi Johnson, 'but we have to move forward, not backward. Up, not down. Maybe now I will get the ball more.'

When asked for comment, the highly decorated coach simply said 'I'm not here to talk about the past.' Word is that he will pursue jobs in hockey and basketball, or take it easy until the California Angles begin spring training.

Interim coach will be long time special teams coordinator, repo man. Rumored candidates for the vacancy include young up-and-comer Kirobaito, and veteran fantasy manager Agent Proto.

EoFFFL commissioner Fresno was unavailable for comment.

[The Captain]

I'm not sure whether this sudden shuffling will be a rallying point or a further spiral this week against my team.

Also, this firing wouldn't have anything to do with the recent sex boat allegations against the Enforcers would it?

Take care all.

[RSL]

lol

[Raistlin]

Maybe the Enforcers should give Coach Murder a second chance as the waterboy or something.

Man, I need a defense.

[eestlinc]

repo man is definitely a dark horse for coach of the year!

[Del Murder]

<B>ENFORCERS GO EVEN FURTHER SOUTH</B>

<i>Oakland Tribune</i>

Only days after firing head coach Del Murder, the Enforcers make another shocking move by picking up and moving to Los Angeles. This comes in the middle of a 2-5 season, and a crucial matchup against The Vagabonds this week. Critics and players alike are baffled by this move, but not 6-10 Wildcard wide receiver Ashley Lelie, 'They needed a change, and made a change. I don't see what the big deal is.' Others feel it is a big deal. 'We had our gameplan for a game in Oakland,' says Vagabonds quarterback Jake Delhomme, 'and this move is very inconsiderate. I can't believe the league allowed it.'

Commissioner Fresno had this to say about the move, 'Both teams are happy with the decision, so I allowed it.'

The Enforcers have been in Oakland since the 2003 season. A move was rumored to take place after that season, but then current coach Murder opted out of it, blaming the league for 'keeping him out of the big market.' His lawsuit was promptly dismissed.

The Enforcers have had struggling ticket sales, despite coming off their second title in three years. The last two home games did not sold out, and were not on local television.

Interim coach repo man was approached for comment, but none was solicited when a wrench came flying in the direction of this reporter.

[Strider]

I would also like to add that Los Angeles is only four hours from Fresno. Come on now, Jake.

[eestlinc]

The Seven Nation Army looks to get off the schneid this week in a favorable matchup with the injury-ravaged Team Discovery Channel.

[Agent Proto]

I approve of this current round of events.

[Raistlin]

This week, Arizona receiver Anquan Boldin is possibly out for the year with a knee injury, and Patrick Pass also left his game with an apparent hamstring injury (no word as to the severity yet).

Join us next week for the next episode in this epic series: "Who Does Spiff Lose Next?"

[eestlinc]

I guess it's mildly worth the chance on Anquan to trade for him, maybe.