Jackass Jock: Billy, you're a fairy.
Me: *examines nails and speaks in bored tone* Nymphs and sprites exist only in the minds of the infantile and ignorant...
Jackass Jock: Huh? I said you're a fairy!
Me: *sighs and examines other hand's nails* I have no wings; I am 6'5", and I speak in a deep voice. I have no paranormal powers, save for my intellect, which is only paranormal when compared to the likes of you... I lack all the qualities of the mythical creatures you suggest. *looks up at Jackass Jock* I sincerely hope that your prowess at football outweighs your mental development, or you're bound to a future as naught but a burden on society... *walks away*