That wasn't mustard!

[Flying Mullet]

An email I received recently:

As ham sandwiches go, it was perfection. A thick slab of ham, a fresh bun, crisp lettuce and plenty of expensive, light brown, gourmet mustard.

The corners of my jaw aching in anticipation, I carried it to the picnic table in our backyard, picked it up with both hands but was stopped by my wife suddenly at my side.

"Hold Johnny (our six-week-old son) while I get my sandwich," she said. I had him balanced between my left elbow and shoulder and was reaching again for the ham sandwich when I noticed a streak of mustard on my fingers.

I love mustard.

I had no napkin.

I licked it off.

It was not mustard.

No man ever put a baby down faster. It was the first and only time I have sprinted with my tongue protruding. With a washcloth in each hand I did the sort of routine shoeshine boys do, only I did it on my tongue.

Later (after she stopped crying from laughing so hard) my wife said, "Now you know why they call that mustard 'Poupon.'"

Puns aside, have you ever eaten anything that ended up not being what you thought it was? And do tell what you ate and what you thought it was.

[UWAOOOOU]

YES

[boris no no]

everything i eat i mean to eat ;p

[Dreddz]

In Thailand thats quite the dish..

[DreamingOfDreams]

I once ate a curry that was really dog food . . . . . It was quite nice actuly . . . . .

[UWAOOOOU]

And do tell what you ate and what you thought it was.

xD I honestly spent a good half minute trying to remember things I could list before I gave up and

YES

[Xander]

Haha, I was working at a place and I bought dinner from the canteen there. Sprinkled some salt on my chips, started eating them, realised it was...sugar. xD It was SO disgusting! I sorta like scraped them off and you could still taste it. I felt so dumb for that xD

[Spammerman]

dont think so.If I did, I forgot.

[T-MaN]

I thought I was eating chiken once, but then, I realized that this was not chicken. It was a turtle's feet. This was in a foreign restaurant. Never eat from a restaurant where you can't tell the names of the food you are eating.

[Sakura Valentine]

Okay, I was eating either raisins or dates (I don't recall) but I didn't know that a COCOROACH crawled into the little bowl, and I put it into my mouth, only to FEEL it squirming and pinching my tongue! I spit it out before you could scream, "COCOROACH!" and went to rinse my mouth after...well... lost my lunch ...*clears throat* Anyways...*shivers at the mere thought of it*

[RSL]

I can't think of any time where I've done that, but I wanted to reply and say that that story made me lol.

[Psychotic]

I once ate a cake with a snowman on it (It was Christmas time!) expecting it to taste like chocolate, but instead it tasted like sulphuric acid.

Not that I would know what sulphuric acid tastes like, of course. The guys down at the pool hall don't pay me 50p to drink it or anything!

[Dixie]

I THOUGHT THAT TUNA WAS CHICKEN!

I was wrong.

[disapointedchild]

I ate dog food, I thought it was cocoa puffs. (Thats a cereal)

[SomethingBig]

You know that thick and viscous white puss that comes out of big plants? Yeah, my friend told me it was milk and okay to drink. I licked. Grimaced. Spit. Got laughed at.