Child discipline

[nik0tine]

I don't see a problem with spanking in very small amounts. However, I believe that spanking with an implement such as a belt or paddle should not only be frowned upon, it should be illegal. Ask yourself this: What is the goal of spanking children? Unless the answer that you come up with is "To inflict as much pain as possible" then you probably shouldn't be focusing on how much you hurt a kid.

Also, you all focus on the "behavior" of a child during the now. Nobody seems to be thinking past the current moment. As far as I can tell, what is important is what the child becomes, not how he/she is acting right now. I understand that they shouldnt be allowed to be complete dicks, but think past the now and give a little thought to what you want your child to be later in life.


Also, I think that spanking causes submissiveness in people. The last thing any society needs is a submissive one, so I am opposed to anything that turns people into submissive morons.

[ocean]

Spanking or other uses of physical force dont teach the child anything. Telling the child why what he did is wrong and making him feel to blame is more afective in the long run than hitting them. Any punishment that gets the child to say: "this is wrong because..." and not: "my parents dont like it so i'll do it behind behind their back" is preferable.

[Anaisa]

You should not have to hit your child to get them to behave if you both understand each other. If you know your child as you should you should know ways to punish them without violence. And once your understanding of each other goes so deep you probably won't ever need to punish them.

[Alive-Cat]

I used to get hit quite bad, if i'd done like anything wrong. But that stopped around the age of 10 because it stopped working. I think that it CAN be the only option, but it's definately not the best punishment.

[DMKA]

Every child is different. Sometimes spanking works, sometimes it doesn't, and sometimes it's not even necessary to consider it. You can't just generalize kids when it comes to this.

[Dreddz]

I have been never hit, not once, well, my mum would slap my thigh to move away, or slap my hand if im say reaching out for something I shouldnt. But these were very light.
Im not having children, so I aint got none of this to worry about, If i do have kids ( accident ), I would never hit them, but call them names and make them feel worthless.....

[Shlup]

I recently watched an episode of Super Nanny where she became involved with the worst-behaved children I've seen on that show. They spit in their mothers face, they fight violently, they scream; when one boy was put on time out he got pissed off so he just pulled down his pants and peed on the time out spot.

Super Nanny employed several techniques and the children quickly emproved. With no hitting, no spanking, no yelling, no "well it's not good but sometimes you just have to" parenting techniques. And don't give me that "Super Nanny is stoopid 'cause she's on TV!" crap; just because a professional allows cameras to show what they do as an in-home parenting coach does not make what they're doing bunk. No child care specialist is perfect but anyone who dismisses Super Nanny doesn't know a thing about appropriate parenting so nyar.

[Mneme]

I've been thinking about this one a bit lately so it's kind of nice to find it on a chat board I've just joined.

I was never really that badly punished as a child. Yes, I got the odd clip if I did something soundly shocking (my only firm memory of ever being hit was a sound slap to the leg when I flicked my fathers ear... which I have to say I felt he was justified in even then), but never was I beaten with the intent of teaching me a lesson in my opinion.

As far as I've been able to determin in my own head the simple fact is this. If an adult - be they stranger, friend, relation, what-have-you - went to hit another adult they wouldn't expect to get away with it. They'd expect to be hit back, sued, hit by the persons friends whatever. If you hit a someone much smaller than you infront of your friends it likely wouldn't get you credit either. So why on Earth should hitting a being that's usually around 3 foot shorter than you (at least), masses about half your own body weight, and who relies on no one in the world as they do you... ever be right?

If you were looking after an elderly relative who went a bit senile and started acted up you would not be able to get away with telling people that you hit them for their own good and education. So why should it ever be okay with children?

Yeah... the odd strike from adults never did me any harm... But I don't think I'll ever find hitting a child laudible or excusible.