Name: Chuck Norris

Gender: The only REAL man.

Weapon: Chuck Norris doesn’t need weapons. His little finger has more power than one hundred Masamunes.

HP: Chuck Norris doesn’t need Hit Points as he’s never been hit.

MP: Chuck Norris says magic is for pussies.

Str: No ones ever been able to calculate it, as everything he hits disintegrates.

Def: Defence is for people who can’t Roundhouse-kick.

Eva: Chuck Norris doesn’t evade attacks, attacks evade Chuck Norris.

Luck: You would have to be unlucky to run into Chuck Norris.

Mag: See MP

Mag Def: Before you are able to cast a spell, Chuck Norris will have already Roundhouse-kicked you seven hundred and eighty seven times, so Mag Def is hardly necessary.

Agi: Faster than Sonic the Hedgehog, Superman and The Flash combined. Yes, he’s that awesome.

Crest/Sigil: When Chuck Norris found out that in FFX you had to use these pieces of [img]/xxx.gif[/img][img]/xxx.gif[/img][img]/xxx.gif[/img][img]/xxx.gif[/img] to power up your celestial weapons, he flew to Japan, roundhouse-kicked all of the Square staff, and forced them to change it.

Overdrive: Is there a time when Chuck Norris ISN’T in overdrive?

Attack: The only attack that Chuck Norris has to use on you is his Roundhouse Kick. He roundhouse-kicks the screen, causing all your characters to die, all of your save data to be erased, and make your controller shoot up and hit you in the head. When you wake up, you will find that your PS2 has caught fire, and you have suffered 3rd degree burns.

There is also a 60% chance that you have been infected with a sexually transmitted disease.