"My Homer is not a Communist. He may be a liar, a pig, an idiot, a Communist, but he is NOT a porn star!"

"Hmm. What would the captain say in this situation?"
"Don't fire the torpedoes."
"Fire the torpedoes!"

"The Soviet Union will be pleased to offer you amnesty to your wayward sailors."
"Soviet Union? I thought you guys broke up?"
"Yes! That's what we wanted you to think! Hahahahaha!"
(Switch to shots of tanks, soldiers, Berlin Wall springing up and Lenin resurrected growling "Must... crush... capitalism!")

"Tell me, Simpson. What do you want out of life?"
"I want peas"
"Yes, we all want peace. But what's the best way to get peace?"
"With a knife!"
"Exactly! Not with the olive branch but with the machete! Simpson, I've really taken a shine to you. You're like the son I never had."
"And you're like the father I never visit."

Sorry, only episode I've watched in ages.