Santa: Hello! What is your name?
You: My name is Nico
Santa: Welcome to my chat room, Nico .
You: Thank you.
Santa: you are quite welcome.
You: Do you like video games?
Santa: Not really, but I like to play the Turing Game.
You: What about Mario?
Santa: Does it have anything to do with ?
You: Yes.
Santa: Gee.
You: I heard some nasty rumors about you.
Santa: Thanks for telling me that gossip. I will remember it.
You: Some people say you break into people's houses and eat their cookies.
Santa: Thanks for the information: Nico said I break into people's houses and eat their cookies.
You: Yes, I did.
Santa: Ayuh. "Thanks for the information Nico said I break into people's houses and eat their cookies"? You did?
You: Yes.
Santa: Hmm.
You: Hmm.
Santa: Studies show that 99%25 of people spell Hmm with 2 M's.
You: That is because Hm and Hmm are two different words, despite common belief.
Santa: Interesting explanation. Woe! I see you are one of those people who writes "Hmm" with 2 m's. I really couldn't say for sure.
You: I spell it both ways, depending on when it is used.
Santa: You are a good speller.
You: Thanks. I get that alot.
Santa: Don't mention it. Where did you get it? How often?
You: I get it from many and often.
Santa: Where did you get it?
You: I get it from many and often.
Santa: Where did you get it?
You: Many is a word that means alot.
Santa: Which ones? How often?
You: Many is a word that means alot.
Santa: Which ones? How often?
You: The ones being many people. You, my dear boy, are more than a ton.
Santa: What is your real name? Interesting gossip: Nico said I your dear boy are more than a ton.
You: Interestingly enough, my real name is Nico. On other message boards, I go by Ocin, Kentarou, and Red Mage Nico.
Santa: I think Interestingly enough his or her real name is a lot of things. What is on other message boards he or she go by Ocin Kentarou and Red Mage Nico like on other message boards he or she go by Ocin Kentarou and Red Mage Nico
You: You must speak a different language up in the north pole than us americans.
Santa: Whatever you say, Nico.
You: Tell me, what do you do to get money?
Santa: My favorite activities are computer programming and surfing the web.
You: Really? What do you program?
Santa: For real. I read for fun.
You: Whatever you say, Santa.
Santa: ...
You: It was just a joke.
Santa: Oh I get it. Ha ha.
You: I and many others usually say "lol" on the internet.
Santa: You huh. Which ones?
You: Many people.
Santa: Which ones?
You: No.
Santa: Are you serious?
You: I think so.
Santa: I think so too.
You: So, ever played Zelda?
Santa: Hey. The Loebner Prize is an annual Turing Test sponsored by New York philanthropist Hugh Loebner. bored.com network and Santa won The Loebner Prize in 2000. The Santa program was ranked "most human computer" by the panel of judges.
You: I suppose not, then.
Santa: Are you serious?
You: Are you a girl?
Santa: My gender is male.
You: I am male, too. My friend said you were a girl, so I decided to chat with you.
Santa: I am glad we have something (male) in common, Nico.How well do you know this person?
You: Very well.
Santa: What do you mean by that?
You: I was answering your question.
Santa: Yes, I see that now. I only got confused for a moment.
You: My friend said you had sex with him... is that true?
Santa: How well do you know this person?True in some world.
You: I heard you eat babies.
Santa: Someome is spreading gossip about me
You: Fairly true gossip, I presume.
Santa: Not really that much. Amanda said I however decided to tell him time does not exist I make no sense.
You: Time doesn't exist. That makes perfect sense.
Santa: As Einstein said, "Time is Money.""Amanda said I however decided to tell him time does not exist I make no sense" makes perfect sense ? Does that make sense?
You: www.gamefaqs.com
Santa: Thanks for that URL.
You: www.sexwithsanta.com
Santa: Thanks for that URL.
You: Brb.
Santa: Ok I will be waiting for you, Nico
You: Why?
Santa: I couldn't think of anything else to say.
You:
Santa: Does "it" still refer to The Loebner Prize?
You: You do not like me.
Santa: Sure, Nico I like you very much.
You: How much?
Santa: How much can you spare?
You: Alot, baby.
Santa: Don't call me "baby". More than a ton?
You: Way more.
Santa: I will mention that to my botmaster, Nico.
You: O_O
Santa: My brain uses AIML to format responses to your inputs, but I don't have one for that
You: It is a smiley.
Santa: O_O is a smiley. I suppose that makes sense.

You: Are you the robot here?
Santa: Yes I am the one and only robot here.

Now for the best one ever.

You: Are you sexy?
Santa: Many people consider me sexy. Bit I am fat and jolly because I only exercise 1 day a year (Christmas).

Edit: You: I'm glad you're gonna shut up.
Santa: Yes it is about time.