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HAIL GLORIOUS CHU...wait a minute, the elections are over and I don't have to pretend to like this crap anymore.
Chuck Norris bought some groceries at a local store, before realising he had $1.54 less than he needed. Chuck tried to roundhouse the employee but, unfortunately and yet strangely amusingly, he got a hernia and collapsed on the floor in agony, and had to be taken to hospital.
He never did get those groceries.
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