OK. Where to start?

1. Fanfiction goes in the Writer's Corner.

2. The way you are all writing this is more of an RP. It would go in the Role Playing subforum of the Writer's Corner and be subject to the roleplay rules.

3. Just looking over this, the subject matter isn't really appropriate for this forum, especially as there was no warning at all for those who might be browsing the thread. So it gets closed.