Marly, you asked for suggestions for improvements.

Firstly, thats a fantastic first go! Well done! You have shown sensitivity and emotion.

I think she needs a bit more colour in her face - a bit of blusher is always nice.

Re the eyes: remember that eyes are round balls resting in sockets and visable is the front part. Eyelids are usually always showing, and add to the 3 dimensionality.

A slight shadow on the underneath of the brow towards the curve of the nose would also enhance, but not too much as she has a quality of luminance and frailty about her which you want to retain.

A 'broken' dash of white or pink on the lips would add the gloss factor.

Hope these suggestions help.