The Rules of Chocolate
If you've got melted chocolate all over your hands, you're eating it too slowly.
Chocolate covered raisons, cherries, orange slices and strawberries all count as fruit, so eat as much as you want.
Problem: How to get a bar of chocolate home from the supermarket on a hot day. Solution: Eat it in the carpark.
Diet Tip: Eat a chocolate bar before each meal - it'll take the edge off your appetite and you'll eat less.
If calories are an issue, store your choclate on top of the fridge. Calories are afraid of heights and they will jump out of the chocolate to protect themselves.
If you eat equal amounts of dark and white choclate, that constitutes a balanced diet because they cancel one another out.
Money talks. Chocolate sings. Beautifully.
Chocolate has many preservatives. Preservatives make you look younger. Therefore you need to eat more chocolate.
Put "eat chocolate" at the top of your 'To Do' list each day. That way you'll at least get one thing done.
A nice box of choclates can provide your total daily intake of calories in one place. Now isn't that handy?
If you can't eat all your chocolate, it will keep in the freezer. But if you can't eat all your chocolate, whats wrong with you?
If not for chocolate, there would be no need for control-top pantyhose. An entire garment industry would be devastated. You can't let that happen, can you?
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