If you and your wife would like to play with another husband and wife couple (with our own LS for helping all level players) you can join Fenrir ^^

Some things that you may like that have changed are the things that have changed in XP. They smoothed out the level grind from 50-75 a very long time ago and made it a little easier to get there. They also added rings that give you XP bonus so that also makes it easier to level up. More people know what they are doing so that also makes it easier.

Beyond those things, a lot of other things have been changed that would be impossible to list. I don't really see FFXI dying any time soon but it is more of a hardcore MMO as you may remember. A good thing is the extremely social aspect of it vs other games. I find it great for me and my wife.