I have a question for the Men

[DK]

1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like nothing's wrong.We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle, besides we know you will bring it up again later.

Seriously! Just freaking ask again, lazy asshole!

Just be honest the first time.

QFT

[Shlup]

1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like nothing's wrong.We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle, besides we know you will bring it up again later.

Seriously! Just freaking ask again, lazy asshole!

Just be honest the first time.

Women have adapted the "Nothing... *sniff*" strategy as a result of being shot down repeatedly when we're direct with our feelings. We have to draw you in first to gain your concern.

And I realize this isn't always true, but that's the basis of where the "nothing" comes from. It's not just girls wanting to play games.

[Sylvie]

The thing I've noticed with my mom is:

She complains to my dad about how I make her cry, and my dad really doesn't care. Well, he cares, but he just doesn't make a huge deal of it.

[KH-Cloudy]

i agree...what the heck is a mauve anyways?!? at least fix the toilet sets when your done >_>

~IT's WACK

[Araciel]

some is true, some isn't. it's made for 'macho guys' and i'm guessing on a forum about final fantasy, you will find that they are in the minority. it's funny, but i don't put much stock into it.

[The Summoner of Leviathan]

Mauve it is like a redish purple.

[Tavrobel]

Guys' Rules
Please note... these are all numbered "1"
ON PURPOSE!
True.

1. Men are NOT mind readers.
True.

1. Learn to work the toilet seat.
You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down.
We need it up, you need it down.
You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.
True.

1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon
or the changing of the tides.
Let it be.
True.

1. Shopping is NOT a sport.
And no, we are never going to think of it that way.
True.

1. Crying is blackmail.
True.

1. Ask for what you want.
Let us be clear on this one:
Subtle hints do not work!
Strong hints do not work!
Obvious hints do not work!
Just say it!
True.

1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.
True.

1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do.
True; unless you've got a problem, don't say anything
Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
False; sympathy is for wimps.

1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a Problem.
See a doctor.
False; doctors are a no-no.

1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.
In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.
False; all statements said the previous day are voided or nulled.

1. If you won't dress like the Victoria 's Secret girls, don't Expect us to act like soap opera guys.
False; I want you to act like a girl from the VS' commercials without me having to do anything.

1. If you think you're fat, you probably are.
Don't ask us.
False; we don't care unless it affects us personally.

1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of them makes you sad or angry, then we meant the other one
True.

1. You can either ask us to do something
Or tell us how you want it done.
Not both.
True.
If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.
False; you will eventually need our help anyways.

1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during commercials.
False; say it when the program is done.

1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.
False; Columbus knew where he was going, but winded up somewhere else by accident, WE have something called a "shortcut."

1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like
Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have n o idea what mauve is.
False; there's only seven: red, orange, yellow, green, blue, purple, and white. Black is not a color, brown is a variation of orange.

1. If it itches, it will be scratched.
We do that.
False; we itch if it bothers us.

1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like nothing's wrong.We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle, besides we know you will bring it up again later.
True.

1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer you don't want to hear.
True.

1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine...Really.
False; the less, the better.

1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation,
or golf.
True; but includes politics, and other topics of interest, such as football and the NFL Preseason.

1. You have enough clothes.
True.

1. You have too many shoes.
True.

1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!
True; depends on the case.

1. Thank you for reading this.
Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;
True; but the couch is pretty damn comfortable.

[Psychotic]

Yeah that stuff's true for whiny and insecure girls, but unless she was extremely good looking (and we're talking a 5 star here) I don't know why any guy would go out with a girl like that, and it's their own fault if they don't like it.

[Hawkeye]

It's true that women over react, bad. They also need to learn when to keep quite once in a while.

[ValkyrieWing]

*sigh*

Perpetuating the caveman ideal.

My dad does a lot of these things...my boyfriend, not so much. :P

It's true that women over react, bad. They also need to learn when to keep quite once in a while.

I think I'm offended a little. Not all girls overreact, or are loud and annoying.

[Araciel]

It's true that women over react, bad. They also need to learn when to keep quite once in a while.

im speechless

[Jojee]

1. Learn to work the toilet seat.
You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down.
We need it up, you need it down.
You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.

But boys also need it down to duce. Therefore, it's more appropriate for it to be down. Not that it has to be down; it's called being considerate. And if you want me to cook dinner for you [read: my husband], you should want me not to have to touch the toilet seat because next time I have to I will not feel inclined to be so considerate as to wash my hands.

That's exactly what I was gonna say.

Although I really don't care if the toilet seat is up, AS LONG AS YOU DON'T LEAVE IT DOWN WHEN YOU PEE AND PEE ALL OVER THE SEAT and then I sit down and I sit on your pee and it's gross and I kill you really much ewguh.

[Tasura]

I agreewith a couple of those, though dont ask m which ones becuase Ive forgotten already, but some i dont agreewith, like the tv/sports thing, I dont watch sports, or TV, cept forHouse when I remember to watch it.

In regards to the toilet seat thing, if Im anywhere that isnt home, or theres company I put the seat and lid down, at home i might if i can remmeber too.

[Shiny]

1. Men are NOT mind readers.
Agreed.

1. Learn to work the toilet seat.
You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down.
We need it up, you need it down.
You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.
Not agreeable; a little consideration would be nice since the toliet lid was designed to acutally cover the toliet.

1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon
or the changing of the tides.
Let it be.
Agreed.

1. Shopping is NOT a sport.
And no, we are never going to think of it that way.
Agreed.

1. Crying is blackmail.
Not agreeable; however there are certain people who cry to make people feel bad for them.


1. Ask for what you want.
Let us be clear on this one:
Subtle hints do not work!
Strong hints do not work!
Obvious hints do not work!
Just say it!
Agreed.

1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.
Not agreeable; not all questions. For instance, "how was your day?" "No." Wtf. Yes and no are acceptable to a few questions, but it shouldn't be almost every.

1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do.
Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.
Agreed.

1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a Problem.

See a doctor.
Agreed.

1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.
In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.
Agreed?

1. If you won't dress like the Victoria 's Secret girls, don't Expect us to act like soap opera guys.
O_o Agreed.

1. If you think you're fat, you probably are.
Don't ask us.
Agreed.

1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of them makes you sad or angry, then we meant the other one
Haha, agreed.

1. You can either ask us to do something
Or tell us how you want it done.
Not both.
If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.
Agreed.

1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during commercials.
Agreed.

1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.
-_- Not agreed; my dad spent and hour circling around before we finally yelled at him to ask for directions. I don't like my time wasted, because some guys don't want their pride diminshed.

1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like
Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have n o idea what mauve is.
^_^ Gay men seem to know what mauve is and that's good enough for me.

1. If it itches, it will be scratched.
We do that.
Agreed.

1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like nothing's wrong.We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle, besides we know you will bring it up again later.
Agreed.


1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer you don't want to hear.
Agreed.

1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine...Really.
Not really.

1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation,
or golf.
Ew. Golf. Agreed.

1. You have enough clothes.
Agreed.

1. You have too many shoes.
Meh.

1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!
Not agreeable

1. Thank you for reading this.
Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;

But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.
Except...inside. Agreed.

[farplaner]

The rules are good ones for the most part (as good as completely generalized rules can be).

[QUOTEAverice-ness]1. Learn to work the toilet seat.
You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down.
We need it up, you need it down.
You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.

But boys also need it down to duce. Therefore, it's more appropriate for it to be down. Not that it has to be down; it's called being considerate. And if you want me to cook dinner for you [read: my husband], you should want me not to have to touch the toilet seat because next time I have to I will not feel inclined to be so considerate as to wash my hands.[/QUOTE]

Nobody likes touching the toilet seat, but until someone invents a way around it, that's the way it is. Right now, I live with no women so the toilet seat stays wherever it was put on its previous usage.

However, if I could find a woman who would cook me dinner every night, I would gladly scrub the toilet after every use in addition to adjusting the seat...so far I can only get women to help me with one dish: the hot salami wrap. [can you say ban?]