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Thread: Augh! Jess Art!

  1. #1
    absolutely haram Recognized Member Madame Adequate's Avatar
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    Unhappy Augh! Jess Art!

    This could very well be how the world ends:

    The first reports would be sporadic and unverified; somewhere in South-east Asia, there's some kind of bizarre phenomenon driving people into suicide or murderous rages. Various governments deny it, but a western reporter would see the events first hand. The rioting and violence would spread faster and faster, and the police and armies of those nations would, where they weren't driven insane, be helpless against the onslaught.

    The brave reporter has managed to find the source of the insanity - Jess Art. She is driven mad instantly, and kills herself. Unfortunately, her camera is turned on the Jess Art, and it is broadcast back to her company's HQ in LA. The entire office degrades within half an hour into a den of sin, and police are called in to deal with it. But they fail to do so, with many becoming insane themselves. The SWAT are called in, but too late - the information has been put up on the internet by an intern who held onto his sanity just long enough to get word out. He didn't realize, however, that the Jess Art was hiding in the data, and would reveal itself worldwide to billions of people within an hour.

    It's all downhill from there. The entire planet plunges into chaos, two billion people kill themselves, hundreds of millions are murdered, and the handfuls of survivors witness the complete breakdown of civilization. Eventually the President of Russia is exposed to the pictures. He loses his mind, but realizes he has the power to do much more than simple mindless slaughter - he launches nukes at every major city on Earth. The other nuclear-capable nations retaliate, and the population of Humanity is reduced to a few survivors on a remote island in the Pacific which doesn't have computers. But one day, this last, confused vestige of Humanity sees a cargo ship drifting to shore. It is beached, and they board it to see two dozen dead crew, killed by each other or themselves.

    One of the tribespeople goes to the computer, where a blood-stained monitor is on screensaver... he touches the mouse, and the screen blinks into life.

    Jess Art.

    The tribe is destroyed before nightfall. Humanity is over. Only a few small animals and tough grasses have survived the Jess Art holocaust, and Earth shall never again house intelligent life - any being which evolves to the point where it can understand Jess Art will go insane and die. Any aliens who visit will quickly realize the planet is a single globe of evil, and will either quarantine it or simply plunge it into the sun.
    ---
    Without the brave, eternal vigilance of myself and Wesley, this fate could very well befall the world. Jess is constantly trying to propogate her Art, tool of Satan that she is.

    But we are stalwart and brave. We shall not let it happen if we can prevent it. Sadly, this opens the door for many other forms of destruction to strike. So, are you afeard of the apocalypse? What form do you think/fear it will take, if it occurs?

  2. #2
    Gobbledygook! Recognized Member Christmas's Avatar
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    Nothing can save us from the inevitable.

  3. #3
    Shlup's Retired Pimp Recognized Member Raistlin's Avatar
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    It is a very tough, very thankless job.

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    Banned Skarr's Avatar
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    :sad:

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    My_car_is_faster_than_you's Avatar
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    You're born, you live, you die. There are a million ways to do it.
    BEHOLD!!! The 88 Plymouth Sundance!!

  6. #6
    absolutely haram Recognized Member Madame Adequate's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Raistlin View Post
    It is a very tough, very thankless job.
    We must endure. They can never thank us properly, because they can never know the true horror of what we protect them from.

  7. #7
    dizzy up the girl Recognized Member Rye's Avatar
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    I don't know what to say to this... this... BLASPHEMY. When faced with Jess Art, they make feel lightheaded and dizzy, but open because everything finally makes sense to them. They feel as if they are on a brisk mountain, their troubles miles away, breathing in the fresh air a hopeful tomorrow. The only way that Jess Art could make someone go insane is if they lose their Jess Art and are plunged back into the mundane cruel everyday reality of life. ;_;


  8. #8
    absolutely haram Recognized Member Madame Adequate's Avatar
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    Or if they ever see Jess Art.

    That could drive them insane as well.

  9. #9
    Shlup's Retired Pimp Recognized Member Raistlin's Avatar
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    I agree with Huxley; the end of the world will likely happen because of Jess Art. The Book of Revelation was written after someone got a look at a Jess Art that was so horrible it created a rift in space-time and traveled back in time.

  10. #10
    Banned Skarr's Avatar
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    Wait a minute I just read the whole of what Milf posted...I'm going to find this Jess Art.

  11. #11
    KentaRawr!'s Avatar
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    What's Jess Art?

  12. #12
    sly gypsy Recognized Member Levian's Avatar
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    Being afraid of the Apocalypse is silly, I'm more afraid of pancakes and those are just to die for.


  13. #13
    Pat Fenguin Xaven's Avatar
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    No, I'm not afraid of the Apocalypse.

  14. #14
    Banned Decessus's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Skarr View Post
    Wait a minute I just read the whole of what Milf posted...I'm going to find this Jess Art.
    Goodbye.

  15. #15
    Who's scruffy lookin'? Captain Maxx Power's Avatar
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    I may not be able to do anything, but Captain Planet can!

    Captainnnn Plannettt.....
    There is no signature here. Move along.

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