Hypothesis: All Keiths are awesome.

[-N-]

I have been formulating such a theory in my head for some time, and recently I have found some evidence external to my own that confirms the hypothesis stated above. I submit collected evidence so far.

1. Keith A.: One of the best guitar players I know. Can play ANY Zeppelin, ANY Hendrix, ANY RHCP, and god dammit, that's good enough for me. But here's more: advanced composer and soon-to-be-released songs coming.

2. Keith S.: A really goofy and fun-loving guy, this Keith is taller than me (a rare feat). A premier skydiver, and someone who can have fun without drinking (always respectable).

3. Keith M.: One of my best friends when I was in elementary school, this Keith also introduced me to the Final Fantasy series. Now that is something awesome.

It is urgent that you respond with any supporting or dissenting evidence you may have to this hypothesis, so that it may be reviewed appropriately before it's submission to the Alfred Nobel Committee.

You have the once-in-a-lifetime chance to contribute to a high-profile research study. Do not make the mistake of passing this golden opportunity to get your name published and respected across the globe and across many fields by its respected practicers.

Thank you for your time and help with this monumental effort.

Sincerely,
N
Director of Research and Development
Crazy Theories that are Correct Department

[Kirobaito]

*clears throat*

I present to you..."Keith."

Resembling Ken Jennings slightly in appearance, he has set a record for Jeopardy! on the computer game (created in the 80s, mind you) for winnings on the computer of one Casey Daniel Graham. He recently dominated his sister, winning 40,000 to -1600. This man is surely a god of some sort, as his brilliance masters all. This is a cool Keith, for sure.

[fire_of_avalon]

My Keith is a Keith M too. He draws me fun pictures of me riding octopi and talks to me about relationships and music and cars and all sorts of things. I love my Keith because he loves me. Keith is awesome.

[Kirobaito]

Oh, yes, and I must mention that The Keith Conspiracy is sponsored in full by #trivia, a subsidiary of Chatroom Awareness More Than a Week.

[Del Murder]

I have never known a Keith. I suck.

[TheAbominatrix]

I must destroy this theory with the case of Keith Hitler... I mean... Hiller... who was a liar and very mean person most especially to our favorite admin, ShlupQuack. He is the devil.

[DMKA]

This is kinda like my theory that all Anthonys are assholes...I've yet to see it proven wrong.

I've only known one dude named Kieth in my life and that was a classmate of mine in 4th grade. He was pretty cool, I guess. Hes the one student I can remember in that class who never did anything mean to me/made fun of me/lied on me, ect...well, besides my friend Nathan(yeah, 4th grade was baaaaad for me ).

[-N-]

Oh, yes, and I must mention that The Keith Conspiracy is sponsored in full by #trivia, a subsidiary of Chatroom Awareness More Than a Week.

Yes. For more information, contact myself, KB, FoA, CloudDragon, Jebus, or just go in the freaking channel.

[fire_of_avalon]

TheAbominatrix, your Keith is just a fluke. He wasn't supposed to be called Keith. He just had an uncle named Keith who was so cool, his parents decided the name must live on, but gave it to their most evil offspring because of a drunk fortune teller.

[-N-]

[q=TheAbominatrix]I must destroy this theory with the case of Keith Hitler... I mean... Hiller... who was a liar and very mean person most especially to our favorite admin, ShlupQuack. He is the devil.[/q]

Thank you for your submission. Unfortunately, due to the proximity of this Keith's last name with that of an infamous mass murderer reclassifies this Keith not as a Keith but as a Hitler. Therefore, I'm afraid this case is inapplicable to the theory. Thank you, and please continue submitting more evidence to us in the future.

[Del Murder]

This is kinda like my theory that all Anthonys are assholes...I've yet to see it proven wrong.

[chichi]

My mums husband is called Keith- I can't stand him....

[Kirobaito]

The evidence supplied is inconslusive to non-awesomeness. We will get back with you at a later time.

- KB
aka Kirobaito
aka King Bahamut
aka Kiro
aka Hey You

[Shlup]

Not a chance. My last boyfriend was a Keith. I don't know why I even associated myself with such a superficial ass.

[Kirobaito]

Shlup, we've had this discussion. We have formulated 2 different responses:

Your Keith is just a fluke. He wasn't supposed to be called Keith. He just had an uncle named Keith who was so cool, his parents decided the name must live on, but gave it to their most evil offspring because of a drunk fortune teller.

Thank you for your submission. Unfortunately, due to the proximity of this Keith's last name with that of an infamous mass murderer reclassifies this Keith not as a Keith but as a Hitler. Therefore, I'm afraid this case is inapplicable to the theory. Thank you, and please continue submitting more evidence to us in the future.