Originally Posted by
Hypoallergenic Cactuar
I was once a peaceful gopher, however, I was knocked off my safe rock and onto the hill by a falling body in a hazmat suit. I landed in the irradiated grass and turned into gopherzilla. I then ate you and claimed the hill.
This is silly. I'm not responding to this.
Originally Posted by
Formalhaut
That Hazmat suit makes you slow and clumsy, and I sneak up behind you, and push you down the hill, breaking your neck.
Because of this, I claim the hill.
Because you are so busy sneaking, you don't bother to look up. I ride my giant eagle Gwaihir over you and cast you into the fires of Mount Doom. I claim the hill for myself, because "It is mine. My own. My precious."