We've all heard the story. How one man, charged with producing a swan song of a game, managed to change fate and launch perhaps the most successful and well-known video game series of all time.

But that is ancient history, and ancient history is, quite frankly, boring. Let's try and spice things up a bit now, shall we?




Welcome to Final Fantasy. This game has peanuts for plot, and while I love peanuts, a lot of people are allergic to them. So, we are here to change that (the fact that the plot is peanuts. Gosh, try and keep up will you!). I will be playing through the game, adapting events and making up tit to (hopefully) create an entertaining, hilarious and still bloody useful guide to the game. We're just going to wing it, basically, and see what happens.

But I cannot do it alone. Well, I probably could do it alone. I am, after all, smurfing fantastic, but that takes all the fun out of it. So you guys are going to help me in a variety of ways. Your suggestions and comments, speculation and nonsensical statements will all be of use to me as I try to piece together a story for the ages. Jokes, gags and gimmicks might all feature, so keep them coming and together we'll create a masterpiece!

I will be playing the Dawn of Souls version, because a) I have access to it; b) it is easy for me to screenshot; and c) there is no c.

So come on, and let's get this thang started! My first mission for you all: Assemble our Light Warriors and name them! This is your story, now is the time to embrace your destiny!

GO FORTH AND CONQUER.

(Note: Naming characters is perhaps the most important part of this game. Because this is an EoFF presentation, I wouldn't mind using EoFF based names, but puns and dirty words are also acceptable. Keep in mind that putting your own name forward is selfish, egotistical and encouraged.)