I do not know who the Best Artist at EoFF is. But I am a cultural man, so I decided to hit up EoFF members Cz and Rantzien so that we could rap with each other about art. This was the result.
Psychotic: Eyes on Final Fantasy FanArt - Sapphire Dragon - Powered by PhotoPost this is called Sapphire Dragon and it is by KoShiatar.
Psychotic: Now I for one like the decorative jewellery the dragon is wearing.
Cz: The title promises much, and the work delivers.
Psychotic: Even legendary beasts have to look stylish.
Cz: Are those decorative horn carvings I spy?
Psychotic: I heard those are the new wing rings.
Rantzien: It's probably some religious thing.
Psychotic: I mean that's what I heard. I'm not saying it's the truth.
Psychotic: Oh, what kind of religion do you suppose a dragon would follow?
Rantzien: Buddhism.
Cz: Catholicism is the most draconian religion iirc
Rantzien: Be a good dragon and maybe you will not spew fire in your next life. Buddha said that.
Psychotic: The word draconian always makes me think of Romania. I think it is because of the whole Dracula thing they used to be into.
Rantzien: In any case, it's a very blue picture!
Cz: Before the blonde hair and house music, you mean?
Psychotic: Indeed!
Psychotic: What do you all think about the ladies' buttocks being displayed so prominently?
Psychotic: I'm going to make an assumption that she rides the dragon, and surely it must be uncomfortable sitting on its scales without some form of protective padding.
Rantzien: I wish someone would think of the children.
Rantzien: Of her children.
Cz: The buttocks are nature's protective pads, no?
Psychotic: I wonder if dragons have buttocks.
Cz: I doubt it. Why would they need them?
Psychotic: Dragons need protection too!
Cz: Unless they use them to mount other, larger dragons.
Rantzien: Well, they need to reproduce too, don't they?
Psychotic: I suppose they do!
Cz: I'm not so sure about that. In fact, that may be why they died out.
Psychotic: Next on our cultural agenda we have Eyes on Final Fantasy FanArt - Shiva - Powered by PhotoPost Shiva, a piece by Rocket Edge.
Psychotic: I always wondered why an Ice Queen would be a rastafarian myself.
Psychotic: Seems like poor research on Square's part.
Cz: Ooh, I like the work agenda.
Rantzien: Another blue girl!
Psychotic: It seems like blue is all the rage in the Artist's Forum!
Cz: As is fancy jewellery.
Psychotic: What do you even call that fancy tail-like thing she has?
Cz: Those hair rings must be deadly in combat.
Rantzien: I think that is a whip.
Psychotic: It looks to have a rather soft tip. If I were Shiva (I am not, I am speaking hypothetically) I would use it as a pillow whenever I got tired.
Psychotic: And I do think that repeatedly blasting ice at ugly looking monsters all day does sound like physically exhausting work.
Rantzien: It would seem so!
Cz: You say that, but just think how the monsters feel.
Rantzien: Cold.
Psychotic: I have no sympathy for those wretched beasts. I just want to walk to that treasure chest. All I want to do is peer at its contents. But no. They have to interrupt it with their random encounters.
Cz: You can't blame monsters for being monstrous. They don't know any better.
Psychotic: Perhaps we could send out missionaries to the monsters.
Cz: It isn't their fault they were raised in rough neighbourhoods.
Cz: Quite so.
Psychotic: Well let's be fair here, I don't really think a beach next to Costa del Sol is a rough neighbourhood.
Psychotic: I mean yeah, those crazy House things you have to duel when going through the Midgar slums, I can understand where they're coming from.
Cz: They're only fighting urban sprawl.
Rantzien: They probably have AIDS.
Cz: AIDS doesn't exist in videogames, silly.
Psychotic: They call it "Mako poisoning" I think.
Rantzien: Poor Cloud.
Psychotic: Alright, what's next? I know the answer! Eyes on Final Fantasy FanArt - Girl (2008) - Powered by PhotoPost this is Girl, which was created by Jojee.
Psychotic: I think it was created for the one they call Kawaii Ryűkishi.
Rantzien: She's not as blue as the others!
Rantzien: But just as lightly dressed.
Psychotic: Summer is coming. Let's not be too harsh on these ladies. Times have changed.
Rantzien: Well there is the global warming thing.
Cz: At least she has the decency to put socks on.
Cz: The previous pictures were decidedly sockless.
Psychotic: Do you think that, based on the success of this picture, more aspiring artists at EoFF will include socks in their etchings?
Rantzien: I, for one, certainly hope so!
Cz: I would not be surprised if someone were to come out with an entire sock collection.
Psychotic: That would be bold. That would challenge my perceptions of what I believe to be art.
Psychotic: What do we think of the background?
Psychotic: In the top left corner, I can clearly see an ugly man with a big nose and an underbite.
Rantzien: I think it's her brother, peeking from the periphery.
Cz: Looks sort of like France to me.
Psychotic: Somehow, just somehow, I think it could be all three.
Cz: Or none!
Psychotic: Or none!
Rantzien: The possibilities!
Rantzien: It's an ambiguously deep picture in that sense.
Psychotic: Onto our final piece, Eyes on Final Fantasy FanArt - Dark Flan - Powered by PhotoPost a nice little number entitled "Dark Flan" whose artist is black orb.
Psychotic: Now, I want to know how something like this can happen.
Psychotic: Perhaps I am mistaken, but I think Flans are slow moving creatures. Clearly this armoured chap must have been standing around while this thing slowly rolled up to him and squashed him.
Rantzien: Or already lying.
Rantzien: Maybe picking flowers.
Cz: Tut tut. And he's left his sword carelessly out of reach.
Cz: That'll teach him to pick pansies, the pansy.
Psychotic: At least the Flan seems to be enjoying itself. That's a look of pure decadent pleasure on its face.
Rantzien: I find this picture extremely erotic.
Cz: It reminds me uncomfortably of something.
Cz: ...Psyduck?
Rantzien: You don't think they're... partners, do you?
Psychotic: Oh lord. I...I don't want to think about it.
Cz: That flan is rather large. Psyduck may be present, but obscured by his bulk.
Psychotic: Perhaps the flan is a suit of armour, and the Psyduck is concealed within.
Cz: Not possible. The being is weak against fire.
Psychotic: Ah yes.
Rantzien: Maybe the soldier should light a match? Start a forest fire.
Psychotic: I think he should just say the safe word. But he seems too proud to do that.
Psychotic: His pride will cost him dearly. Goo does not come out of armour easily, and I speak from experience.
Cz: The problem may not be so dire. He may not even be wearing armour on his lower half.
Cz: In fact, I'm quite sure of it.
Rantzien: I wonder what the inside of a Flan is like.
Rantzien: Looking into his mouth, all I can think of is: "What would happen if I crawled inside?"
Psychotic: Your face would appear upon its surface, and you would be lost forever.
Psychotic: Remember Psyduck. Remember his sacrifice.
Cz: Now that I look again, it does appear that he may have swallowed something that didn't agree with him.
Cz: See how he clenches his stomach and groans in anguish.
Rantzien: He does look a bit pitiful.
Cz: Are you sure he has not swallowed you already, Rantzien:?
Psychotic: I'm not sure how sitting on a semi-armoured soldier will help to ease his pain.
Cz: We cannot be expected to understand the ways of flans.
Rantzien: Have you ever tried sitting on a semi-armoured soldier?
Psychotic: I have not.
Rantzien: Unlucky you!
Rantzien: Possibly.
Psychotic: I think we may have to wrap things up here! I don't think anybody will read all of this, but that is their loss for it has been truly an enlightening experience. Thank you gentlemen, we deserve our own weekly column on a blog somewhere.
Rantzien: I share your opinions!
Cz: I dissent so as to avoid seeming too conformist.
Cz: But it has been a pleasure, nevertheless.
Rantzien: You're very unique.
Psychotic: WOO BEST ARTIST! YEAH!
Originally Posted by Del Murder
I was disappointed when browsing the Artist's Forum to find I couldn't see much from you 
Artist's block?
I've just washed my hair and about to watch the Simpsons, bbl~ 
GO BLACK ORB 
