Those are some nice ideas, but nope, sorry, we only pick people based on how fun they are and nothing else. We have an index ranging from "NOT FUN" to "CID'S KNIGHT" that we use to grade all applicants. Trust? Love? Rules? What the hell is all this nonsense? You're crazy. Stop being crazy.
...although crazy can be fun, so maybe that's your angle. You're a sly one! Full marks!