What do you do with

[Timekeeper]

Nick, while your historical "football derives from all games played on foot by people who didn't play polo on horseback" argument is one I support, this is modern day.

People still play games like polo and horseball, so it's still a valid distinction between the two!

And assoc != soccer. Wtf man whoever invented that is balls insane.

Hey! Woah! Hey! How dare you claim that the derivation of slang terms from their original words doesn't make sense. How very dare you!

AFL is allowed to be football, but not the football.

Globally, your argument holds, but not regionally. So, yes, I'll give you the point that Association Football is the football of the world, but not of the US or Australia.