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Thread: My bellybuton knot

  1. #16
    What the bliff Recognized Member
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    Quote Originally Posted by shion View Post
    When I was little, my moms boyfriend put the fear of lint fire in me. he told me if i left any lint in the lint trap it would cause a fire and burn the whole house down. I realize now that it takes quite a lot of lint for that to happen but I still check the lint trap before and after to make sure there isn't any lint.
    It's actually common for houses to burn down from lint fires, so something to be concerned about. My dad's a Fire Captain and says the #1 cause of house fires other than kitchen fire is laundry related fires. My house almost burnt down from having the lint in there. Now we of course check every time we use it.

    I was always a cynical child so it was hard to convince me of anything. I told my Great Grandmother Santa wasn't real and she got pissed at me. She was like, "YES HE IS! I HEARD HIM COME DOWN THE CHIMNEY!" And I was like, "We don't have a chimney." I was six at the time. She also tried to convince me that a six year old should have a credit card I was like, "No." And she's all "What do you know? You're six." If I was older I probably would've came up with a witty or sardonic retort.

    My brother convinced me of something though. He was good at that. I forget what it was, but I remember having a good laugh about it and even years later he holds it against me. "Remember when you fell for that" kind of thing.

  2. #17
    Shlup's Retired Pimp Recognized Member Raistlin's Avatar
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    I can't remember any really good ones for me off the top of my head, as, like Shiny, I was always a suspicious and cynical kid. But one time I was staying in a room at my grandfather's old hotel that my mom at the time was helping run. She called over to the room from the front desk (in a separate building) and hurriedly told me that there was a bomb threat and I needed to evacuate immediately. I was maybe 10 or 11 years old.

    So now you all know where I got the asshole gene from.

  3. #18
    Not responsible for WWI Citizen Bleys's Avatar
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    I used to believe in God.

  4. #19
    bless this mess Clo's Avatar
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    I didn't think we lived in a world that made it possible for anyone at all to believe in Santa or the Easter Bunny past the age of 9.

    I don't know how any of you avoided the real world for that long.


  5. #20
    get mad Zeldy's Avatar
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    I used to think that if I used anti-ageing face cremes that I'd turn into a baby.

  6. #21
    Slothstronaut Recognized Member Slothy's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ~*~Celes~*~ View Post
    i was told by a classmate when I was in 3rd grade that the hamburgers school lunch provided (soyburgers i later found out) were actually made from kangaroo meat. I was so gullible.
    I can see why finding out they were soyburgers would be traumatizing. God awful things that I wouldn't wish on my worst enemy.

  7. #22
    Would sniff your fingers to be polite
    Nameleon.
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    Oh! I just remembered one!

    My dad brought out some frozen beef mince from the freezer and told me it was dinosaur meat. Hell yeah I believed that trout! xD

  8. #23
    Nerf This~ Laddy's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Quinter Wonderland View Post
    Oh! I just remembered one!

    My dad brought out some frozen beef mince from the freezer and told me it was dinosaur meat. Hell yeah I believed that trout! xD
    Goddamn that's beautiful.

  9. #24
    Steve Steve Steve Steve Iceglow's Avatar
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    When I was a kid, my brother convinced me that Santa was an alien otherwise how the hell else could he make it round the planet in one night. I believed him no matter what anyone else said. My brother was basically an ass but god damn he was a genius asshole. In true family tradition I have since convinced every one of my nephews and nieces of this fact. They all believe me completely, this is why we know I can be the bigger asshole than my brother... he only managed to convince 2 kids, I've convinced 7

  10. #25
    Would sniff your fingers to be polite
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    You certainly have a knack for persuading kids, Steve. Where did you get it from? Have you ever worked with kids before?

  11. #26
    ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ Tigmafuzz's Avatar
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    I didn't ever believe in Santa or the Easter Bunny or "God" or any of that stuff, since I didn't know what they were until I was about 13 or 14 anyway

    If you say gullible three times fast with your tongue sticking out, it sounds like "antidisestablishmentarianism."
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  12. #27
    ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ Tigmafuzz's Avatar
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    ...It just sounds like he was trying to get into your pants.
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  13. #28
    ...you hot, salty nut! Recognized Member fire_of_avalon's Avatar
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    One time these kids at school gave me their pizza.

    But I noticed the cheese had been pulled up so I pulled it back and the pizza was full of salt.

    So I put it back on the kid's plate.

    They couldn't even trick me with pizza. Pizza. Yeah, I didn't believe much.

    Signature by rubah. I think.

  14. #29
    dizzy up the girl Recognized Member Rye's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by fire_of_avalon View Post
    One time these kids at school gave me their pizza.

    But I noticed the cheese had been pulled up so I pulled it back and the pizza was full of salt.

    So I put it back on the kid's plate.

    They couldn't even trick me with pizza. Pizza. Yeah, I didn't believe much.
    Ewwwwwwwwwww


  15. #30
    Not responsible for WWI Citizen Bleys's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by fire_of_avalon View Post
    One time these kids at school gave me their pizza.

    But I noticed the cheese had been pulled up so I pulled it back and the pizza was full of salt.
    OOC:Hmm...this sounds like it could have potential.

    Of course I'll use Preparation H instead of salt


    I think I may have told this story before, since I'm not the gullible one in it.

    I used to work with this lad by the name of Robin, who thought he was King trout when it came to cars. He flat out said he knew everything there was to know about any car, and was annoying as hell about it.

    After a few weeks of listening to his BS, I bided my time until there was no conversation going on, then:

    Me: "Hey Robin, you...know a lot about cars, right?"
    Robin: "Do I ever! I know things th--"
    Me: "What kind of car was it again that had fallopian tubes in it?"
    *pregnant pause*
    Robin: "Uh...I think the '59 Dodge had 'em."

    A few days later he tried to act like he'd known what I was doing and played along, but he fooled nobody

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