I've visited this page three times debating about whether or not I should post that I fell down another set of stairs again in heels today, this time from the deck outside. It's like they're out to get me.![]()
I've visited this page three times debating about whether or not I should post that I fell down another set of stairs again in heels today, this time from the deck outside. It's like they're out to get me.![]()
This was when I got home.
fine infe fine
i live across the street from a building that's being built. they're currently building at the same level as me, and every morning when i get up i flex at the workers and stretch at them and they enjoy it
mostly i keep forgetting to use blinds and curtains so i get up in the morning half/mostly naked and get up and look out the giant window and leave for the bathroom immediately.
I farted in front of my boyfriend for the first time. We were laying in bed and it squeaked out, I was so entirely embarrassed I had to slink away.
Boldly go.
I fart loudly in my sleep. It's so routine my girlfriend claims she can have conversations with my ass.
If I have kids, I hope they look up my internet history.
Yeah farting in front of your SO is no big; Hux and I even point it out when one of us does it.![]()
I was doing a bit of down stairs gardening once (cutting the pubic grass backk to respectible levels) and it's something i hate so I i get bored and distracted. So there I am stretching the ole sack out clippin away like a wee mad bastard or something, being dangerously distracted by the hilarious Green Wing when SLICE. I only went and sliced through my scrotal ball purse didnt i. Blood everywhere. I instantly knew who to blame. Scissors. Broke those evil smurfing things, cleaned the blood up and stuck a wee plaster on the thing and had it cleaned up in time for Dr's Statham's hilarious mating dance he does with a recorder in his yfronts.
On the downside the wife laughed for 4 weeks and my testicles atomatically retract everytime I cut a steak.
THEMS THE BREAKS.
You offer those?
For a... price.![]()
I'll take the sprained ankles and bruises, thanks.