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  1. It's hard to explain puns to kleptomaniacs
  2. What do you get when you cross a joke with a rhetorical question?
  3. The person who invented knock knock jokes
  4. Why can't you hear a pterodactyl going to the bathroom?
  5. Did you hear about the kidnapping at school?
  6. What do you call a sleepwalking nun?
  7. LIFE HACK: Cold? Go and stand in the corner for a bit.
  8. Why was 6 afraid of 7?
  9. Your mother is so lacking in class
  10. Two drums and a cymbal fall off a cliff
  11. The thing about roofers is...
  12. What do you call a flute that's converted into a bong?
  13. I tied a clock to my belt.
  14. Why doesn't Lep Zeppelin tip?
  15. What do you call cosplaying on October 31st?
  16. What does a farmer use to count his cows?
  17. What would Tom Hardy be called if he was socialist?
  18. What's a pirates favorite letter?
  19. Why did the dwarf laugh when he was playing football?
  20. Two antennas met on a roof, fell in love and got married.
  21. Did you hear about the man with no arms and no legs who swam around Australia?
  22. What did 0 say to 8?
  23. A man walks into a zoo. The only animal in the zoo is a dog
  24. Where did Noah keep his bees?
  25. What do you call a snobbish criminal going down the stairs?
  26. A man came home to find that every single lamp in his house had been stolen.
  27. What happens to nitrogen when the sun rises?
  28. A jumper cable walks into a bar.
  29. You're living, you occupy space, and you have mass. Know what that means?
  30. What did Professor Oak say before he got into a fight?
  31. A man woke up in a hospotal after a terrible accident. He said to the doctor...
  32. What did the buffalo say to his son when he left for college?
  33. Why is Peter Pan always flying?
  34. A psychic dwarf escaped from a jail
  35. What do French people call a bad Thursday?
  36. Why was Hitler hit with a baseball bat?
  37. What do ghosts get when they're turned on?
  38. What type of currency do they use in outer space?
  39. What is Whitney Houston's favorite type of coordination?
  40. Princess Peach got sick...
  41. What did a female Castlevania NPC say while walking in a bad part of town?
  42. Camping
  43. What do Titanic and The Sixth Sense have in common?
  44. So I shot a nail gun into a crowd of Pokemon. I got arrested.
  45. Two friends waved at each other for the same amount of time.
  46. When people were upset that Pluto was no longer a planet I told them not to worry...
  47. Fred Durst was playing Super Mario 3. He was very excited to get the Racoon suit...
  48. What do you call a pirate statue on top of a building?
  49. I'm addicated to brake fluid...
  50. Dwayne Johnson tackled a giy and pinned him to the ground.
  51. Sure, FFVIII may have its flaws...
  52. Why did the chicken cross the playground?
  53. Knock Knock
  54. I used some polish remover
  55. What's brown and sticky
  56. What's the best thing about Switzerland?
  57. why was the energizer bunny arrested
  58. how does NASA organize a party?
  59. A farmer in the field with his cows counted 196 of them
  60. Why canít a bike stand on its own?
  61. I started a band called 999 Megabytes
  62. A man walks into a zoo. The only animal in the zoo is a fish.
  63. Mario breaks up with Princess Peach
  64. A cop pulls over Werner Heisenberg
  65. What do you do with a sick chemist?
  66. How do you make seven an even number?
  67. What did Al Gore play on his guitar?
  68. "Hey Ken, can I borrow some money?" Ryu asked.
  69. I'm not gonna raichu a love song
  70. why did the flying cow love Final Fantasy?
  71. I taught a tissue to dance!
  72. Why did Legolas decide to learn archery?
  73. Ok! This needs to stop!
  74. My doctor told me I have a yeast infection
  75. Why can't a nose be twelve inches?
  76. So, there's a man crawling through the desert.
  77. A man is on a game show
  78. Why did she knead dough?
  79. Did you guys hear about the cows who smoke weed and play poker?
  80. My mom and Shauna's mom became FB friends today
  81. What does Trent Reznor put on his minature boats?