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ReloadPsi
05-14-2008, 06:58 PM
Dance Of The Goblins is a book that was independently published, ostensibly with 2000 copies going out into bookstores around the UK.

Now, Jaq D Hawkins (or Denise Channing; Hawkins is her pen name for whatever reason) is working on a movie adaptation.

Of a book that's had 2000 copies printed.

This has been something of an injoke with my classmates since before Christmas (and something the second year students were already in on) after we had to watch some footage of an episode of Dragon's Den, where Channing utterly failed to secure a £175,000 investment towards the film's budget.

YouTube - Dance of the Goblins pitch on Dragons Den (http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=sTpniqoZQM4)

After we all agreed that her pitch was pretty sucky, a few of us did some poking around online, looking at its IMDB entry and so on. Then just today, we saw this:

YouTube - Goblin Marketing Trailer v1 (http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=dZNlWndkEeE)

It looks like home video. We were amused and horrified. Apparently the trailer was produced on a tight budget, not using the help of their incredible prosthetic teams, none of their more experienced staff who would've demanded adequate payment, no appearance from this actor whom she's apparently paying a million quid.

What I invite you EoFFers to do is just take a look (hence the links) and see what you think about this. Personally I think this is a ridiculous pipe dream and, if it shows up at the Duke's theatre near my college (they screen indie films) we're all gonna go watch it, if only for the laughs.


BONUS BOX!

Register at IMDb.com (http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0993751/board/threads/)

Though you'll need an IMDB account to read this, one particular fanboy puts us FF fanchildren to shame. You will be very reluctant to say bad words about the FF fandom after reading some of this martyn-b-drake's remarks.

Balzac
05-15-2008, 01:45 AM
Dude, are you in Lancaster? AHAHAHAHA.

Anyway, yeah, it looks like crap, but I've seen worse, a lot worse.

Jaq
05-16-2009, 08:28 AM
Dance of the Goblins is not "independently published." A small publisher is still a legitimate publisher.

By all means, go watch it just for laughs. You'll see the difference between a no-budget volunteer video and a properly produced film with a budget.

Meanwhile, the project I actually have filming right now will give you even more laughs. But then it's a comedy. And it's the DD publicity that has made it possible to get it distributed.

Oh and for the record, the million quid was a number off my spreadsheet that I was never allowed to explain. But that's how the game is played. A good kill is better publicity than a win. ;)

~ Jaq

Psychotic
05-17-2009, 06:38 PM
Jaq, I google image searched you and you are a foxy looking lady. I'm 22, unemployed, and I have all of my own teeth. How 'bout it?

PS: If it helps to seal the deal, I did the "What Goblin Type are You?" quiz on your site and got human. Although I'm not gonna lie to you, I do kind of feel disappointed not to actually be a goblin. :-/

scrumpleberry
05-17-2009, 07:17 PM
Found those youtube vids for reference!

YouTube - Dragons' Den | Series 5 Episode 4 - 2 of 6 (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b20GC8W3XPU&feature=related#t=6m4s)
runs into this one obviously~
YouTube - Dragons' Den | Series 5 Episode 4 - 3 of 6 (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nocd0uefrfA&feature=related)

Jaq herself has several vids on her youtube channel, including I believe the original teaser...

YouTube - jaqdhawkins's Channel (http://www.youtube.com/user/jaqdhawkins)

Also I am apparently a human magician! Swanky.

Psychotic
05-17-2009, 07:21 PM
YouTube - Leekspin - Goblin Loituma (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Bnxr1OtoFl8&feature=channel_page)

Is this the greatest video on YouTube?

Yes, this is the greatest video on YouTube.

Kilted Goblins. With leeks.

Quindiana Jones
05-17-2009, 07:29 PM
If it makes you feel any better Psy, I want you to know that in real life you actually look like a goblin.

Psychotic
05-17-2009, 08:23 PM
Quiiiiiiiiin! Don't embarass me in front of the Goblin Lady! I think I have a real chance here. Why don't you play wingman and distract her goblin friend for me?

Quindiana Jones
05-17-2009, 08:55 PM
I have given all the characters of the above post names of certain members of this forum. :)