View Full Version : Kidnap the Sandy Claws!

12-20-2013, 04:08 AM
What sort of elaborately abominable and devious tactics would you use in order to capture Sandy Claws?

I think he might fall for the old trip snare with some milk and cookies across the room as bait.

Huckleberry Quin
12-20-2013, 04:11 AM
Bears at the bottom of my chimney.

12-20-2013, 04:12 AM
If there's anything I learned from the movie, The Santa Claus, you just need to yell at him while he's on the roof to make him fall and capture him. Of course, he ends up dead, which is unfortunate, but you gain his Santa Claus powers.

I'd just keep a net inside the chimney that would catch him as he goes down.

12-20-2013, 04:25 AM
Tranquilised Cookies

12-20-2013, 04:37 AM
beat him with a stick!

12-20-2013, 05:59 AM
Dress like a sexy female version..

Wait I'll just do that for my own enjoyment.

12-20-2013, 06:30 AM
Why wouldn't I just offer him a beer? He's not unreasonable. He gives everybody gifts fer chrissake

12-20-2013, 07:02 AM
He doesnt drink and sleigh

12-20-2013, 11:56 AM
Grab a Bazooka and shoot him down while he's flying, and then while he's knocked out grab him and then poke him for a free Wii- U

12-20-2013, 01:55 PM
None. Santa would just counter with some fairy dust and then replace my presents with coal if I tried anything.

12-20-2013, 01:59 PM
santa claus isn't real, guys

12-20-2013, 02:03 PM
santa claus isn't real, guys

That's not true. That's impossible!

12-20-2013, 02:06 PM
santa claus isn't real, guys

Get out. :stare:

I'd go with bear traps in front of the chimney myself.

12-20-2013, 02:35 PM
santa claus isn't real, guys

Why do you lie? Is it for the attention? You're only hurting yourself.

I wouldn't kidnap him because then who will deliver the toys to the children? I might ask him if I can help out though. In exchange for eggnog. I'm afraid of heights, I'm not flying around in some sled without eggnog.

12-20-2013, 02:53 PM
But if you kidnap him, then he can either give you a Ferrari or all the kids go presentless. I'd help help him deliver presents once I had that Ferrari, but I'd damn well want my supercar before any deals are made. Santa's cheaped out on me for the last time. :colbert:

12-20-2013, 02:58 PM
I would rather he have extra money for toys for the kids. Ferrari's are expensive. That's a lot of kids toys.

12-20-2013, 03:10 PM
Money? I thought the elves just build everything themselves. I'm sure they could handle a Ferrari.

12-20-2013, 03:10 PM
Some kind of impossible spy set up where when he comes down our Chimney it sets off a motion alarm and then it explodes with instant dry cement.

12-20-2013, 03:12 PM
Money? I thought the elves just build everything themselves. I'm sure they could handle a Ferrari.

Well they still need to pay for supplies, I think :|

12-20-2013, 11:45 PM
But if I trap him he'll stop giving me presents. :(

12-21-2013, 12:17 AM
santa claus isn't real, guys

Some of us just want to hold our most overweight male relative for ransom

12-21-2013, 06:18 PM
I'd need a walking bathtub and I don't know how I'm going to get one at such short notice, especially with this being the last weekend before Christmas and all. I'm out.

12-21-2013, 06:35 PM