Reflection Essay

Human beings are not only biological creatures that need to satisfy their own natural needs, but also social creatures that need communication and ideas exchange. History knows some rare cases of saint people, sages, or yogis who could live far from people and that was normal for them. Of course, it is possible, but it also depends on personal world view and psychosocial type, i.e. whether one is introvert or extravert. Anyway, although introverts are mostly shy and quiet people, they also need communication. In general, everybody wants to have friends or like-minded people who can share knowledge, experience, and impressions and be by one’s side for better or worse. However, not everybody knows how to socialize and find friends. Dale Carnegie is one of book authors who gives amazing and simple advices how to win friends and influence people in a friendly way.
Many people aspire to be famous and impact the society. Their irrepressible desire to conquer people’s respect and love often transforms into a destructive power, because they become aggressive, importunate, and seem to be egocentric and selfish. Such a character cannot help them in attaining their goal. Dale Carnegie gives an alternative, saying that it is better to concentrate on the interlocutor than one;s own Ego. To win another person’s attention, it is essential to be interested in his or her thoughts, mood, impressions. Thrusting one’s own opinions on others is absolutely not friendly, and it makes them scared of this obtrusiveness.
Also, Carnegie is sure that it is possible to win friends only by honesty. Honesty is the most simple and natural way of behavior, and people can feel it almost at once. People like to feel that they are meaningful; it is easy to let them feel it asking about different things that are interesting for them. Listening to what they think about social, political, religious or any other issues is truly important, because it increases the level of self-confidence of interlocutors.
Another thing that is important to win new friends is a smile. Sometimes, people speak persuasive things, are sincere and listen carefully, but something goes wrong anyway. It means that a smile was not there. Talking and listening should be accompanied by body language, i.e. smile and gestures that represent inner emotions. Body and face language is a half of success, especially in those situations when interlocutor’s perceptions are defined by visual images.
To avoid aggression and misunderstandings in the dialogue or discussion, critique and condemnation should not appear there. It is worth to remember that every human being is sure that his position is doubtless and right. Trying to prove that somebody is wrong cannot help in winning friends but only in destroying social contacts. There are thousands of ways to express one’s own position not harming the opposing one. Therefore, it is better to try to understand why somebody thinks the way he thinks and show the respect to his point of view.
The last rule to mention seemed to be not so effective as all the previous advices, but it is thought-provoking and worth trying. Carnegie recommends remembering the name of the interlocutor and repeating it quite often during a conversation. People love themselves, and the sound of their name is a subconscious sign that somebody is also ready to love and respect them.
In general, Carnegie’s book is a good ‘self-help’ instruction for those who do not know how to socialize. Of course, every human being has his/her own specific nature, but these most common advices are the first few steps to understand how constructive communication works. More info about this written by Amelia you can find at https://dissertationmasters.com/poem...g-service.html