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  1. Waving The White Flag

    I didn't come here to argue over dumb

    And I'm not gonna put up with it .. I can admit when I'm wrong, but for me to actually apologize and try to fix the problem is a big deal. So of course, getting shut down and out after I bother trying only pisses me off even more.

    I moved 900 miles to be w him, but he can't even be the tiniest but understanding that I left my dad pretty much completely alone, my daughter behind, I'm still not over losing my mom and ...
  2. This Is Nerve-Wracking

    We haven't done anything yet.. Still. Jay's car is iced in pretty good.

    We walked to a Thai restaurant and were gonna go grocery shopping, but he grabbed the wrong debit card, so I had to walk back to the apt and get the right one.

    I walked by myself for the first time in NYC.


    But anywho.. It's stressing me out now.. I'm worried about learning my way around and going off on my own once I get a job and stuff.
  3. not sure if

    im going to a concert of Within Temptation on februari 20.

    but now im not sure if im exited, or feel like my money will be completely wasted :l

    we are having '1st class tickets for standing places' and now im afraid that ill get pushed back, or that ill have to see the entire concert through the telephone screen of the guy before me :l

    the telephone thing botheres me the most.
    i really hate those telephones.. i already told my boyfriend not to film it, ...
  4. Woohoo! Two dollars!

    So far this month I made two dollars (not counting tax) off my blog. Yeah, I know, that's not a lot of money. It's not the amount that has me excited, it's the fact that this is money I actually earned that has me happy. Never really had a job before this (not proud of it just telling the truth) so knowing that something I put work into is generating even a little money is a nice feeling. Plus, with the money I already have in the bank and the cash money I've been holding onto I have a moderately ...
  5. Okay, I'm Good.

    Alright, finally feeling a bit better these days. I figure that if you guys have to put up with extremely negative blogs, I should report when I am feeling happier. Since I made a list of bad random thoughts, I'll list some good things now.

    *Been playing a table top game with friends I met through my girlfriend. It is an original game created by one of her friends that me and several other people been helping play testing. According to the creator, I am apparently very good at it ...
  6. I'm Here!

    I got in Saturday night.

    We had dinner at a Filipino restaurant and just went home afterwards..

    Yesterday, we had lunch at Jollibee's and went to the AT&T store and had dinner at this Mexican place around the corner. It was really good though most of it was american ish food written in Spanish.

    It started snowing pretty hard while we were eating, but Jay said they consider that to be just a light flurry. I was like "o.o .... This is a blizzard ...

    Updated 02-10-2014 at 02:01 PM by noxious.sunshine

  7. There were only two survivors in the final days

  8. No Still smurf You, Mom.

    I can't get over it.

    I try so hard and for the most part, I'm as okay as I can be.

    But I'm still pissed off and hurt. And it will -never- go away.

    I know I've talked about this before, but I can't help it..

    But then I think about our last conversation and how I literally broke down in tears because she didn't call me or invite me to go along to go see my aunt and the other time she was in town and said "Oh, I just didn't think about it." ...
  9. 3 Days.

    ... Until I leave for NYC.

    I'm even more nervous and apprehensive about it now than I before.

    I'm worried about leaving my dad behind & alone to fend for himself (my sister can't/won't physically check on him daily). ... And I already know that he wants me to stay.

    I'm worried that I won't find a job & it won't work out & I'll just be screwed again.

    Either way... I'm stuck. If I don't go, I'll never know- maybe it'll work out for the ...
  10. Radom Thoughts

    *I really need a drink
    *If I wasn't at work, I would have let some sort of emotional collapse happen
    *Not looking forward to driving home in the snow
    *I have reached the point where I feel screaming to release negative emotion is pointless
    *Days like this make me question if I have even made any positive progress over the years
    *I know it's uncool to admit these type of things on the internet, but whatever, make fun of me. Anything you say or think can't even come ...