Teach Yars(and others) How to Cook Thread

Yars cannot cook. He didn't know penne was a pasta. Qwerty and I are having to tell him how to boil eggs.

So any advice on cooking shall be grand! Do you like to cook? Tell us your fav recipe and any cooking advice! Do you suck? Tell us what cooking recipe kicks your butt!



Lekana's SPICING TRICKS!
Make sure your hands are clean first. Before you put the spices in your dish pour your desired amount into your hand. Then take your thumb of the opposite hand and rub the spice in your hand. The natural oils of your hand will bring out the spices flavor :D

If you don't know how much to put in always put in a little bit and add more rather than just what you think is enough cause if you add too much it can ruin a dish =o

go to the store and buy a packet of instant noodles
put them in a bowl and add boiling water
Play Final Fantasy VI for 4 or so minutes
consume with the use of chopsticks.

Teach me how to cook, EoFF!

See Jess is an Other! :D

I am OK at cooking? I make good pastas, steaks, and burgers, but that's about it.

Momiji's foolproof method to proper cooking:

1. Wash your hands.
2. Make sure you have all necessary ingredients for a recipe.
3. Properly set up all ingredients and necessary equipment for cooking
4. Stare at ingredients and equipment.
5. Glance over at the oven.
6. Look back at ingredients, and sigh.
7. Realize you cba to cook, and throw something in the microwave, or order pizza.

*waits for Miriel*

Saffron. A wonderful Flavor. But a Little goes a very long way. Only add at MOST 2 sprigs of it, because it can and will overpower everything else.

Easy way to add flavor to your rice is what you cook it in. instead of water, use a stock like chicken or Beef, and the rice will take in the flavor and be even more delicious.

Iceburg Lettuce. Avoid it like the Plague. Go for Romaine instead.

Never Cut your Lettuce. Always rip it.

If you make a soup, the carrots go in first. They take longer to cook and get soft.

A wok is a wonderful tool. Buy one even if you don't stir fry.

Get a big Knife and a Big Cutting Board. They are also your friends.

I'm Mary Poppins

Here's a little tip for making a sauce
don't add all the liquids at once, santa claus.
Instead add it little by little
and your penis is little
Not only will the sauce be thicker
it'll also get done much quicker!

gtfo! little rhymes with little dammit.

Remove protective anti-air shield cover from breadbin
Carefully place hand inside and acquire the loaf of bread
Unfasten bag and - now this is the most important part - REMOVE TWO SLICES OF BREAD FROM THE BAG. Take it easy now.
Transport slices of bread to the designated toasting area
Insert slices of bread into one of the slice-shaped cooking bays of the toasting apparatus
Apply a downward force on the sliding mechanism, usually on the side of the toasting apparatus, to engage the toasting process (magnitude of force varies)
Wait patiently for approx. 2 minutes
DO NOT jump in fright when the (now cooked) slices of bread leap from their respective toasting bays, this is normal
Remove slices of toast from toasting bays and place on plate
Mission complete

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Old Manus

DO NOT jump in fright when the (now cooked) slices of bread leap from their respective toasting bays, this is normal

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I always do.

Allow your spaghetti sauce to simmer for a while before you add it to your pasta. It tastes so much better if you allow it to simmer~

Quote:

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Make sure your hands are clean first. Before you put the spices in your dish pour your desired amount into your hand. Then take your thumb of the opposite hand and rub the spice in your hand. The natural oils of your hand will bring out the spices flavor

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That is disgusting.

Bunny's Guide to Cooking:
Step One - Get a Woman.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Bunny

Bunny's Guide to Cooking:
Step One - Get a Woman.

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Step Two - Bake at 210 degrees C for three hours, or until crispy?

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Big D

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Bunny

Bunny's Guide to Cooking:
Step One - Get a Woman.

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Step Two - Bake at 210 degrees C for three hours, or until crispy?

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That's really up to you. Personally, I prefer mine straight out of the package.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Marshall Banana

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Old Manus

DO NOT jump in fright when the (now cooked) slices of bread leap from their respective toasting bays, this is normal

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I always do.

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Wow! I thought I was the only one, too. ;;

I microwave everything until my Korean slave finally comes in the mail. I hate cooking and will never learn to do it. My brother is a chef, though. Good for that sap.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Noctiluca

I microwave everything until my Korean slave finally comes in the mail. I hate cooking and will never learn to do it. My brother is a chef, though. Good for that sap.

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I can agree with that. The 'just add water and ingredient pouch' udon I'm eating right now is pretty good.

*waits for Miriel to pop in and explain how I have no idea what good Asian food is*

Quote:

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Originally Posted by qwertyxsora

*waits for Miriel*

Saffron. A wonderful Flavor. But a Little goes a very long way. Only add at MOST 2 sprigs of it, because it can and will overpower everything else.

Easy way to add flavor to your rice is what you cook it in. instead of water, use a stock like chicken or Beef, and the rice will take in the flavor and be even more delicious.

Iceburg Lettuce. Avoid it like the Plague. Go for Romaine instead.

Never Cut your Lettuce. Always rip it.

If you make a soup, the carrots go in first. They take longer to cook and get soft.

A wok is a wonderful tool. Buy one even if you don't stir fry.

Get a big Knife and a Big Cutting Board. They are also your friends.

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Saffron is expensive, also it can be hard to always find fresh herbs. It also depends what you are making too. Though I do hear it has a good flavour, just expensive as far as spices are concern.

Also, fresh herbs tend to be more potent that dried herbs.

If you are using the lettuce right away, you can cut it. We cut it all the time at work. The thing about using a knife to cut lettuce is that the metal from the knife and the lettuce will go through a chemical reaction causing the edge where you cut to go dark green. Not usually a problem if you are using all the lettuce right away though.

Also, what kind of lettuce you use, completely depends what you are making. Romaine is a must for Caesars. At work we use Iceberg on the burgers and sandwiches. Iceberg is also common in Chinese cuisine or at least from what I was reading it is. For a sandwich, arugula is good and spinach offers a nice alternative. I also like plain old leafy greens too. Iceberg is a cheap alternative at times.

Oh, and one knife doesn't work for everything kids. Really depends what you are doing. Having a good chef knife is good. Personally, I prefer small chef knives because they offer clearance for my knuckles but are not so large that you have less control.

On the same note, especially with Chef's knives, there is a proper way to hold a knife. This insures more control of the knife and less chances of hurting yourself or others. Right above the handle of the knife, place your thumb and index finger. Pressing on either side of the blade with those two fingers, this ensures more control of the blade.

Also, if you fear the knife and act that way while using it, chances are you will cut yourself. :/ NEVER pass a knife by the blade, always by the handle.

A lot of this comes from personal experience. I have been working in the same kitchen for almost two years now, so those were some tips that I picked up, others personal observations.

Also, some other stuff:

Never over mix muffin batter. Muffins, unless specified in the recipe, should always look lumpy not smooth. They become smooth when you over mix the batter.

Chopped basil is awesome in tomato sauces.

Garlic is your friend but don't molest it.

Read twice, mix once. On the same note, when it says mix in separate bowls, mix in separate bowls.

Same recipes, different ways of mixing ingredients give different results. Happens when I make certain things compared to my mom. Sometimes when I bake it looks a bit different but taste just as good.

If you don't have a sifter when it says to sift, you can use a chinoise. Or simply use a fork to break all the clumps. SIFTING IS IMPORTANT. It makes the flour and/or dry ingredients less dense as well as break up clumps. This implies that there is a difference between sifting before and after measuring your ingredients.

Lemons work awesome at cleaning stuff like blue cheese off the blade of your knife. :D

Other things that I can't think of right now too...More to come later, if I remember and feel like it.