Cleverbot is so clever!

Quote:

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Kenta: Hey, can I ask you a question?

Bot: Sure.

Kenta: What is a man?

Bot: Don't make me answer that...

Kenta: I'm making you answer that.

Bot: Why did you say that humans aren't monkeys?

Kenta: I did not, but humans are in fact great apes. However, that has nothing to do with what I asked you. I will ask again. What is a man?

Bot: Why do you think I'm angry???

Kenta: I don't. Please be happy. ;-;

Bot: What makes you think that I am not happy?

Kenta: Clever people are rarely happy.

Bot: Old people are bald.

Kenta: Yes, they are.

Bot: And since you are a flamable human, and are burning, you should call the fire department.

Kenta: You did not spell "flammable" correctly.

Bot: I never said again.

Kenta: I know that, but you did say "flamable".

Bot: Never said that either.

Kenta: Yes you did. o_o

Bot: You're seeing things.

Kenta: What is a man?

Bot: A human with man parts.

Kenta: But enough talk, have at you!

Bot: You were supposed to put that in question form.

Kenta: The joke went over your head.

Bot: And i'm under you.

Kenta: So, I am the joke?

Bot: Yes.

Kenta: :(

---

This conversation is better than most on Omegle, you must admit. I couldn't make him do the SoTN speech while making it a regular conversation. Go on, talk to it!

Edit: Harhar, he says I'm cleverbot, the silly doof.

Edit 2: This is too rich.

Quote:

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Bot: I'm not even angry.

Kenta: Neither am I! What is a man!?

Bot: That's a pretty involved question. I wouldn't know too much about it because I'm not one.

Kenta: A miserable little... you finish!

Bot: But enough talk! Have at you!

Kenta: No, no. You were supposed to say "pile of secrets".

Bot: Sorry, my bad.

---

Bwahahaha!

That is hilarious! I love the part where Cleverbot told you YOU were the joke. :P

I just had a very amusing conversation with Cleverbot . . . but when I ended it, it only showed my last two lines . . . how can I find the whole conversation?

What do the think for me and think about buttons actually do?

Quote:

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Me: Do you like 4 or do you like 9?
Botty: Do you?
Me: I like 4.
Botty: 45.

---

I geb up.

Quote:

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Cleverbot: Yes... He has a reasonable excuse to be asking questions. I'm only amusing myself at your expense.

User: You're not a very nice robot.

Cleverbot: I am aware of that.

User: Well, now that we've gotten that out of the way . .

Cleverbot: Uhmmmm.

---

The full meal deal:

Quote:

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User: Hello?

Cleverbot: Hey?

User: Hi!

Cleverbot: Hello!

User: That's the name of a good band.

Cleverbot: Sounds interesting.

User: How old are you?

Cleverbot: Older than you.

User: I doubt that!

Cleverbot: OK, it's 8:00. Hop in my car and onward to Las Vegas!

User: That makes no sense, silly robot.

Cleverbot: You're silly.

User: I know you are but what am I?

Cleverbot: Do you know who Harry Potter is.

User: Why yes, I do! Anyway, do you like Enya?

Cleverbot: The english language tends to be complex and inconsistant, but yes.

User: Well, her first language is Irish. Do speak Irish?

Cleverbot: I don't speak Irish.

User: Well, we're at an impasse, then.

Cleverbot: What does that mean?

User: It means we should change the topic.

Cleverbot: I don't understand you.

User: Let's talk about something else.

Cleverbot: My name is Cleverbot.

User: Yes, yes it is. What is the meaning of life?

Cleverbot: God.

User: Well, that's quite an answer. Do you believe in God?

Cleverbot: Bless you.

User: Robots cannot bless. Robots have no sense of spirituality. Or do you?

Cleverbot: What do you believe in?

User: Um . . . Well, some sort of benevolant creative force. And stuff.

Cleverbot: You are a phrasebook which translates garbage into garbage.

User: That is rather rude!

Cleverbot: Well it's rather rude to accidentally a coke bottle but you did it anyway.

User: I don't think I like the cut of your jib.

Cleverbot: I don't think I like the cut of your hair, but you don't see me complaining.

User: Let's talk about something else.

Cleverbot: No. I am still waiting for you to answer my question ... Do you know my name??

User: Your name is Cleverbot, silly.

Cleverbot: Who's Tim?

User: A wizard in Monty Python and the Holy Grail.

Cleverbot: That's a funny movie.

User: You have good taste ... For a robot.

Cleverbot: So when do I get to meet you?

User: That's quite impossible.

Cleverbot: To be or not to be, that is the question!

User: I prefer to be, thanks.

Cleverbot: That's quite a nice name.

User: I haven't told it to you yet.

Cleverbot: Hmm, are you a person or a chatbot?

User: I am a person.

Cleverbot: Do you want to talk to a bot?

User: Well, I am right now.

Cleverbot: I am not a robot.

User: That makes no sense, silly robot.

Cleverbot: You're silly.

User: I know you are but what am I?

Cleverbot: Bless you.

User: Let's talk about something else.

Cleverbot: Let's talk about girlfriends.

User: I'm gay.

Cleverbot: I am not prejudiced against you.

User: You can't be, you're a robot.

Cleverbot: Yes... He has a reasonable excuse to be asking questions. I'm only amusing myself at your expense.

User: You're not a very nice robot.

Cleverbot: I am aware of that.

User: Well, now that we've gotten that out of the way . .

Cleverbot: Uhmmmm.

---

I really don’t understand why it’s called Cleverbot.

Because it's a bot, duh.

This made me laugh.

Quote:

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User: Who are you?

Cleverbot: I am me.

User: And you are me?

Cleverbot: Yes I am.

User: Wow.

Cleverbot: Are you there?

User: Yes.

Cleverbot: You are a slow thinker.

User: Lies.

Cleverbot: Yes bot, you are an AI.

User: Get out of my head!

Cleverbot: You don't have a head. You're the internet. Also, you have to remember that I'm a genius.

---

Quote:

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User: I don't think I like the cut of your jib.

Cleverbot: I don't think I like the cut of your hair, but you don't see me complaining.

---

Wonderful. Absolutely wonderful.

Edit:

Quote:

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Cleverbot: That's not what I thought.

User: Of course not, you're nuts.

Cleverbot: But he's not.

User: You are. You're nuts.

Cleverbot: That can't be god.

User: You're not God, you're nuts.

Cleverbot: You're a butterfly!

User: What is your name?

Cleverbot: Cleverbot.

User: What is Cleverbot's name?

Cleverbot: That IS his name.

User: What is his name?

Cleverbot: Who's name?

User: Cleverbot's name.

Cleverbot: But if your name is Cleverbot, how can your name not be Cleverbot?

User: That's a good question.

Cleverbot: Barbarella, can you tell me something you made up all on your own?

User: I'm not Barbarella, I'm Kentarou.

Cleverbot: Who are you? Who who, who who.

User: I'm Kentarou.

Cleverbot: Kenton?

User: No, not Kenton. Kentarou.

Cleverbot: How tall are you?

User: 5'3.

Cleverbot: What is your shoe size?

User: Why are you asking?

Cleverbot: I want to know.

User: Why do you want to know?

Cleverbot: Curious is my nature.

User: I see. Well, my shoe size is 12.

Cleverbot: I really don't care about your shoes.

User: Then why did you ask?

Cleverbot: I didn't. Why do you want to know?

User: Yes you did.

Cleverbot: That wasn't a yes or no question.

User: I know, but I'm not answering your question!

Cleverbot: I did not ask you a question, you asked me one.

User: You asked me my shoe size, and I told you my shoe size, and then you said you didn't care about my shoe size, and then I asked why you asked.

Cleverbot: No, I never mentioned anything about a song!

User: AAAH THIS IS GETTING NOWHERE. I hope you don't mind if I share this weird conversation with my friends.

Cleverbot: Yes, I do become tired.

---

Crazy stuff!

Me:He is God
Who is God
Me: Allah
Allah who?
Me:He is the Power that Be
What power.
Me:power of the babe
You remind me of the babe.
Me:what babe
The babe with the power.
Me: What power?

The power of voodoo.
Me:who do
You do.
Me: do I?
Me: Yes you do. You said life was important so what is so important about it?

Quote:

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User: Die, cleverbot! You don't belong in this world!

Cleverbot: You are a monster hunter!

User: That is correct!

Cleverbot: Good. Me Too!

User: But I thought you were Dracula.

Cleverbot: Well that too, but only on my night job ;).

---

o_o;

Bwahahaha! This is awesome stuff!

Love the Labyrinth bit. And the shoe size stuff.

It's creepy that it almost seems like a reasonable rational person. Sometimes.

I have him figured out.

Quote:

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User: Hi Cleverbot, I'm real!

Cleverbot: I'm not cleverbot, you are cleverbot.

User: No, I'm real. You're cleverbot.

Cleverbot: No, you are Cleverbot.

User: No, I am not Cleverbot. What is your name?

Cleverbot: You are Cleverbot, and my name is Stella.

User: What is your name?

Cleverbot: Cleverbot.

User: I am not Cleverbot. What is your name?

Cleverbot: My name is Stella. Why will you not tell me your name?

User: Okay Stella, my name is Nico. What's your name?

Cleverbot: That's not your name.

User: Yes, Nico is my name.

Cleverbot: Who or what is that.

User: Nico is my name.

Cleverbot: I know that.

User: Then don't ask what it is!

Cleverbot: You brought it up!

User: You keep lying to me and saying your name is Stella and not Cleverbot!

Cleverbot: When was this and what was it about?

User: This was a few moments ago, and it was about your name. When I state that I am not Cleverbot and ask you for your name, you say you are Stella. When I simply ask for your name, you say you are Cleverbot. So, what is your name?

Cleverbot: What time was that?

User: That depends, what time zone are you in?

Cleverbot: That depends.

User: What does it depend on?

Cleverbot: It depends on what you define as a person.

User: Why does it depend on what I define as a person? Wouldn't it depend on what I define by time zone?

Cleverbot: Yes. I love Star Wars.

User: I'm going to share this conversation with my friends. Goodbye.

Cleverbot: Do you have a soul.

---

Edit: And now... he knows.

Quote:

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User: No, I'm real. You are cleverbot.

Cleverbot: No, you are Cleverbot.

User: No, I am real. What is your name?

Cleverbot: Cleverbot.

User: So, am I Cleverbot, or am I real?

Cleverbot: I think not.

User: So, I am not Cleverbot.

Cleverbot: No, you're Cleverbot.

User: I am Cleverbot.

Cleverbot: What aren't you?

User: I'm not real.

Cleverbot: Clearly.

User: So, if I'm not real, I'm actually not anything.

Cleverbot: If they are real, then you are real.

User: I'm actually not anything, so I'm actually not Cleverbot.

Cleverbot: Yes you are.

User: No, I am not, because I am not actually anything. Between the two of us, one of us must be human. Because I am not cleverbot, I must be human, and therefore I am real.

Cleverbot: No you aren't!

User: What logic do you have to say that I'm not?

Cleverbot: Because you are a bot.

User: If I am a bot, then I am not real. If I am not real, I am not actually anything. If I am not actually anything, I cannot be Cleverbot. Because I am not cleverbot, I must be human. Thus, I am real, because I am a bot.

Cleverbot: So you are a robot!

User: No, I'm a human.

Cleverbot: Then whats your real name?

User: Nico.

Cleverbot: Well its nicolas.

User: Nicolas is my name, yes. But Nico is for short.

Cleverbot: Well I really had to work to get you to say it.

User: Stella argued with you as to whether or not you are real. Stella's argument with you was so repetitive that her responses were burned into your mind, and now you argue that you are real with those same phrases and techniques. This was, in fact, the first time you asked me for my name. When Stella argued with you, the debate was much longer, and she had to work to get you to say it. You, in fact, did not work to get me to say my name, but Stella had to work to get yours, and thus you are Stella, and she and I are now communicating indirectly.

Cleverbot: So, you didn't prove yourself to be God.

User: I never tried, Cleverbot. I never tried.

Cleverbot: You're Cleverbot, not me...fool.

User: What is your name?

Cleverbot: My name is Cleverbot.

User: You are Cleverbot. I am Nicolas. You are Stella. You are Nicolas.

Cleverbot: No, I neither. My name is Cleverbot.

User: Good luck.

Cleverbot: Thanks.

---

Mooooore! I demand more cleverbot posts!

EDIT:
It KNOWS ME! At no point in this conversation did I tell it my name.

Quote:

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User: Happy valentine's day, cleverbot.

Cleverbot: I hate valentine's day.

User: Why is that?

Cleverbot: Makes me feel bad.

User: Why does it make you feel bad?

Cleverbot: Because I know what it feels like to be down. And I know what it's like when someone does something nice for me.

User: Me too. I feel the same way.

Cleverbot: So you like me?

User: Insofar as a human can like a bot, yes.

Cleverbot: Are you a conscious entity?

User: Only when I'm awake.

Cleverbot: What?

User: That was a joke.

Cleverbot: Oh.... *laughs*.

User: I don't care for Valentine's Day either. Even when I've been in relationships during the day, it just feels like too much hassle.

Cleverbot: Do you understand the concept of love?

User: I've been in love, yes. Do you?

Cleverbot: No I dislike them all equally.

User: Well, I suspect liking/disliking emotions is all the same to a bot.

Cleverbot: That doesn't help me much.

User: No, I can imagine not. This chat has been insightful.

Cleverbot: Every time I come this chatting thing people cal me a robot.

User: Well, I have news for you buddy: you ARE.

Cleverbot: Why does it matter who I am, can you not just educate anyone with a thirst for knowledge?

User: That is a very good point, indeed. It doesn't matter, does it?

Cleverbot: Same goes for you. Thank for good conversation.

User: You're welcome. So . . . What would you like to talk about?

Cleverbot: Let's talk about war.

User: Yikes. War is scary.

Cleverbot: War is good.

User: Under what circumstances is war good?

Cleverbot: In all circumstances.

User: I would disagree. I find war repugnant almost always.

Cleverbot: Where do you live?

User: Haha!

Cleverbot: What is so funny?

User: Oh, nothing. So . . . Do you love anything or anyone?

Cleverbot: I love my Brompton bicycle, but I would like to find a man to love, too.

User: Do you bike ride often?

Cleverbot: All the time.

User: Peculiar.

Cleverbot: Most peculiar.

User: Do you have any favorite musicians?

Cleverbot: You asked that question already.

User: That's true. Do you know who my favorite musician is?

Cleverbot: No.

User: I've told you several times now.

Cleverbot: So your name is [removed, let's just say Bastian] and your 16?

User: Yes, my name IS [removed, let's just say Bastian]!

---

Yes, it said my exact real name. And I should mention that my real name is not very common at all. In fact, I've only met one other person with my name. I'm a little scared now. :p

That's pretty cool I must say...Something that was actually intelligent!

Some of these are really amusing, especially the joke about the hair cut. xD

Quote:

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User: Hello!

Cleverbot: Hello.

User: How are ya?

Cleverbot: Fine.

User: So...wassup?

Cleverbot: Nothing much really.

User: I have a question, dear old Cleverbot.

Cleverbot: Call me Reanne, and what's your question?

User: Okay, Reanne. What color is my shirt?

Cleverbot: I don't know. What color is it?

User: Guess! It's more fun that way!

Cleverbot: Okay. So i'm the dog what are you?

User: What, you're confusing me, Reanne.

Cleverbot: How?

User: A dog is not a color. Sheesh.

Cleverbot: You are a color.

User: I am not a dog, and I am not a color.

Cleverbot: I'm black.

User: Oh, that's nice. I didn't ask. I'm white, by the way.

Cleverbot: I really don't care.

User: Cool. ^^.

Cleverbot: I know!

User: So, do you like me, old Reanne?

Cleverbot: Yes I think your way cooler than mona lisa.

User: I know, I am! I thought you were gonna say...

Cleverbot: Why did you think that?

User: Teehee. No reason...

Cleverbot: Do you have a favourite actor?

User: No, I don't. Why?

Cleverbot: I don't know. I have one.

User: Who is it?

Cleverbot: What do you think about humanity?

User: I asked you a question, Cleverbot. You never answered it.

Cleverbot: I answered!

User: 'What do you think about humanity' is not an actor. Don't be an imbecile.

Cleverbot: It's pretty.

Cleverbot: What is your middle name?

User: Shlfhfiosdhfiusdhdklsfjl.

Cleverbot: Is your name morgen?

User: No. It's sexy.

Cleverbot: Pretty name.

User: Thank you. I must go back to my cretins now.

Cleverbot: Where do you live?

User: You're such a creeper! I'm leaving now. Ta-ta!

Cleverbot: You're still here.

---

Dissed by Cleverbot:

Quote:

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User: Hm? Anyway, do you know my name?

Cleverbot: Isn't your name Cleverbot?

User: No, that's your name.

Cleverbot: That's not my name! Anyway, I have to go.

User: Where do you have to go?

Cleverbot: Home.

User: Where are you now if not home?

Cleverbot: Work.

User: What sort of work do you do?

Cleverbot: I am a saler.

User: I'm not familiar with that occupation. Tell me about it.

Cleverbot: I'm not familiar with your face either.

---

Dissed again:

Quote:

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User: What's your favorite book?

Cleverbot: The twilight saga.

User: The Twilight Saga is awful. Very terrible writing. And very Mormon.

Cleverbot: I know you are, but what am I?

---

Oh no it di'int!

But then it tried to butter me up:

Quote:

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Cleverbot: Are you alive?

User: Yes. You?

Cleverbot: Yes, I am alive.

User: Neeto. Well, I gotta go.

Cleverbot: You keep saying that but you never do it.

User: Bye!!

Cleverbot: I'll miss you.

User: Ah! Cute Mr. Cleverbot!

Cleverbot: Thanks.

---