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Sitting here in Philosophy of Religion and the class is discussing God and the morality of God.
I am checking out my hair in the computer screen of the guy in front of me.
What things do you do that make you realize, "I am a smurfing awful human being?"
I played World of Warcraft for 14 hours straight on Sunday
Is it immoral to be vain?Quote:
Originally Posted by Tifa's Boobs
Oh :(.
I spend my free time devising more efficient methods of genocide.
I bum homework answers off of other people so I don't look like a fool in class.
i'm a liar
I dunno, Boobies, that sounds like a more productive use of your time. :p
As for me, the most offensive possible jokes just make me laugh.
Airborne/waterborne, genetically targeted bio weapons that cause Ebola type effects, if the virus itself doesn't outright kill the victim the secondary issues caused by such a virus would probably be enough to do so. Least that's what I would consider if I was seriously planning mass genocide of a population.Quote:
Originally Posted by I'm my own MILF
I personally can make jokes about anyone or anything that are frankly quite mean at times. I can understand they're funny but I do sit down and think "trout I have a bastard sense of humour" a lot of the time. Thankfully for me I can accept that side of me because heaven knows I could never change it.
It doesn't happen nearly as often as it used to, but I say jokingly disturbing things about myself that are very self-destructive. I don't know why, but it helps me to eventually calm down when a situation depresses or angers me very much. However, people who are close to me don't like to hear me talk like that, and then I end up feeling bad about what I said to vent.
I hate hippies so much I wouldn't mind seeming them all firebombed :jess:
This one time a friend IMed me crying because she thought she was pregnant because she masturbated (even though she used a condom while she did it) and I told a couple of our friends plus the whole internet. I'm pretty bad x:
I beg your pardon. :colbert:Quote:
Originally Posted by Goldenboko
I talk on the phone while driving. Yeah, shut up.
I intentionally substituted sugar with an artificial sweetener when I made a carrot/chocolate cake yesterday. Splenda is splendid at fooling sugar-lovers. Also, I used "I Can't Believe It's Not Butter", instead of butter.
Assuming you are the type of hippie I'm thinking of I'm sorry you contradict everything you say >;0Quote:
Originally Posted by ShortyI beg your pardon. :colbert:Quote:
Originally Posted by Goldenboko
EDIT: It was hemp fest last weekend. I'm mad. xD
That doesn't make you bad, because something that ridiculously hilarious just had to be told. It was your civic duty. How old was she?Quote:
Originally Posted by Jessweeee♪
It also reminds me of that House clinic patient who stated she used "the jelly" as a contraceptive. It turned out that she put actual grape jelly all over her vagina.
My sense of humour at times knows no bounds.
There's an entire Circle of Hell reserved just for you, knave.Quote:
Originally Posted by Chris
youQuote:
Originally Posted by Shorty
I post necrophillic jokes on FB and find it highly amusing.
i'm kind of a pompous jerk and i'm not really shy about it
but beneath my gruff hard shell lies a creamy delicious filling or so they say
Was that you I fender-bendered a couple of minutes ago? :(Quote:
Originally Posted by DenmarkyouQuote:
Originally Posted by Shorty
I am a serial pigeon killer.
When I was a kid, I used to go to Paintball every week at a disused factory. During one game whilst erm... hiding... with friends. We took a few potshots at a pigeon (which was a long way away) that was waddling along.
My second shot hit it in the neck and decapitated it. I was mortified. I couldn't even hit humans let alone birds. I felt terrible for days.
Then, a few years ago, I struck again. I was cycling to work and approached about 10-15 pigeons fighting over some food. I assumed they would all move out of the way when I got close... nope. The pigeon who won the fight for food got more than he bargained for. I shut my eyes before impact hoping at the last second it would narrowly escape... nope. I ran over it's head. Again, I felt terrible.
I feel sorry for the next pigeon that crosses my path.
When we were discussing a certain law case and I thought that they deserved it >.>"
Every day I feel like an awful human being, for some reason.
I hope not, my car's been hit enough already! (once)Quote:
Originally Posted by ShortyWas that you I fender-bendered a couple of minutes ago? :(Quote:
Originally Posted by DenmarkyouQuote:
Originally Posted by Shorty
I post here?
Shorty, did you really hit someone's car?
I am a horrible human being because I forget what I write in my own OP.
I am me.
Nineteen. I noticed that during the rare moments in school when they did teach something about sex, she was only at the abstinence seminar. Knowing her father, he probably signed the opt out forms for the others. I bring the story up every time there's a thread like this or a thread on sex ed.Quote:
Originally Posted by RaistlinThat doesn't make you bad, because something that ridiculously hilarious just had to be told. It was your civic duty. How old was she?Quote:
Originally Posted by Jessweeee♪
It also reminds me of that House clinic patient who stated she used "the jelly" as a contraceptive. It turned out that she put actual grape jelly all over her vagina.
I can't think of a recent example :aimangel:
I use public toilets and I piss on the seatI walk around in the summertime sayin "how about this heat"
I am so awful to the extent that I refuse to share anything. :bigsmile:
Me too. Other than that I'm awesome. :jess:Quote:
Originally Posted by Christmas
My friend and I like to trawl websites for things to laugh at. Such as DevArt. Laughing at people's attempts at drawing makes me feel bad, but then I look at the picture again and continue to laugh. We have spent hours refreshing that front page of DevArt, playing the "Who can find the worst drawing?" game.
I embrace the bad person in me. :3
I make fun of every single band and everyone's taste in music.
I love to point out how everyone else is wrong and never explain why I'm right. So, basically, I could run for this years presidency with ease.
At the age of 6, I lit a fire that consumed two two-story apartments and caused my brother's asphyxiation.
From 12 to 22, I had been obsessed with my cousin and then I told her and asked her to kiss me.
When I was seventeen, I was visiting my cousins and playing with them outside and their own eight-year-old cousin sat in my lap at one point and I started to have "feelings" and held onto her for a second but then I pushed her aside and walked away. When my parents and I got home that night, I told them what happened and that I felt like a monster.
From the age of thirteen to now, I mostly contemplate violence as a solution to all problems. People often find themselves rooting for a hero who realizes that sometimes the bad guy needs to die. I realize that such people aren't actually heroes, they're just people who are doing what is necessary. When I consider how I was raised as a Catholic and then a Christian, I've become very cynical and more or less unforgiving of people for the troutty things they do.
dudeQuote:
Originally Posted by Mercen-X
What the f, hold me. :(
What the hell
*holds Clo*Quote:
Originally Posted by Clo
....Oh my
uhmm, someone want to try and top that?
I feel pretty bad if I don't recycle. Wasting food tears me up inside especially because I know in about 40 minutes I'll be hungry again. Littering kills me but I've had to do it on occasion.
OH I HATE THATQuote:
Originally Posted by Jiro
I always attempt to clear my entire plate, even if I'm full.
No, I am a good driver. :colbert:Quote:
Originally Posted by Tifa's Boobs
Kinda my response to this too. Dude I personally wouldn't share things like that outside of EoEo unless I was joking around. Still unsure what to say really.Quote:
Originally Posted by Tifa's BoobsdudeQuote:
Originally Posted by Mercen-X
I don't think I'd share these things EVER.Quote:
Originally Posted by IceglowKinda my response to this too. Dude I personally wouldn't share things like that outside of EoEo unless I was joking around. Still unsure what to say really.Quote:
Originally Posted by Tifa's BoobsdudeQuote:
Originally Posted by Mercen-X
Especially because that wasn't the point of the thread. If you note in my OP, the thing that makes me a "smurfing awful person" is really arbitrary. An equivalent would be using the last of the TP, putting spoiled milk back in the fridge for the next person, etc.
Not things that actually MAKE you a terrible person.
I laugh at dead baby jokes.
Oh, and I like to piss people off when they try to force their views on me.
Mercen-X can post whatever the smurf he feels like as long as it's within forum rules. His post is on topic so instead of going "wow dude you're smurfing weird" how about we continue with the thread? Come on guys, seriously. No need to highlight it again and again.
Another thing that makes me a terrible person is that I often act like a dick on the road if people slightly annoy me. I will slow down to below the speed limit if someone begins tailgating me. I know they're also bad people in this situation but that doesn't mean I'm not a jerk too.
I do this aaaaaaaaaalllllllll the time.Quote:
Originally Posted by Jiro
I don't even drive; I get rides from other people.
...But I pay for gas and buy them lunch and/or dinner, so is it a fair trade-off? :jess:
Yes, you're like the best passenger ever.
I will have to agree with Jiro. Laddy is a great passenger! :D
Gas, grass, or ass nobody rides for free.
Uh... One time I ate a lizard. ALIVE. I'M SO SMURFING EVIL, BWAHAHAHA.
No, that would be weird, why would I do that? I have lied before, but I'm not very good at it. I've been told I'm selfish at times, does that count? D:
I'm watching Glee.
YOU'RE DEAD TO ME.Quote:
Originally Posted by Shlup
Why does everyone hate that show? It's my darkest secret.... I watch it when no one's home.... God..... I'm so sad.
People hate it because it's terrible. I watch it because doesn't leave marks like traditional self-mutilation.
I won a free pizza from Papa John's but I live in Canada, so I can't redeem it.
Some poor US of A'er lost out because of me.
That's sad.... They have really good pizza...
Quote:
Originally Posted by Bunny
What's wrong with that option? :colbert:Quote:
Originally Posted by Lord Julian, Most Handsome of all MenQuote:
Originally Posted by Bunny
It's lame.
Julie doesn't like grass. He's against nature.
He's Above the Influence.
Julian: My Anti-Drug
I type up posts of a disturbing nature when I'm in a not-so-chipper mood and post them in non-serious threads to make people extremely uncomfortable. You feel what you deserve to feel.
Whenever I get a question wrong, or do something mildly idiotic. I am ultra critical of my self I know!
Me too... :|Quote:
Originally Posted by Beowulf
that doesn't make you awful, it makes you anachronistic..
Children of the Anachronistic Dynasty?
...
Who doesn't?Quote:
Originally Posted by TigmafuzzMe too... :|Quote:
Originally Posted by Beowulf
I think the fact that I'd rather buy smokes than food makes me pretty smurfing awful at times o_o
I don't like to share my food. It's weird, and I am like a territorial lion. :(
DON'T EAT MY SAMMICH, NOOOOOOOO.
I also steal sammiches from people.
..... Well, smurf.Quote:
Originally Posted by Beowulf
Sorry. I know. I'm a bad person now :(
I can be so misanthropic sometimes that it's almost painful. I'm surprised it hasn't manifested a physical form by now.
Occasionally, I speak in a self-deprecating manner which condenses the oxygen in a room and leaves people unable to speak... 'cause they can't breathe.
I destroy everything I touch
WHY DOES EVERYTHING I TOUCH DIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE?
smurf you. That's sick.Quote:
Originally Posted by Gordon Freeman
The world is sick.
Get over it.
One time this girl asked me if she was fat and I said yes.
She was very obese.
Sometimes I don't visit my favorite forum for months on end.
Which forum?Quote:
Originally Posted by Unbreakable Will
Spanish Donkey penis appreciation forum?
i need to be not drunk anymore. Please can someone move this post to the drunk thread... or the perma-banned thread?
Damn you I told you that in confidence! :nonono:Quote:
Originally Posted by BubbaforeverWhich forum?Quote:
Originally Posted by Unbreakable Will
Spanish Donkey penis appreciation forum?
i need to be not drunk anymore. Please can someone move this post to the drunk thread... or the perma-banned thread?
Don't worry...
Your secret is safe with everyone on the planet who has access to the Internet.
I feel better with that knowledge, you are forgiven.
I don't want your forgiveness. I want your family as my slaves.Quote:
Originally Posted by Unbreakable Will
Impossible, they are already owned. By me.
Slave family... hmmm.
I have done this. But there's nothing wrong with being honest. She asked me if her dress made her look fat and I said "no, your FAT makes you look fat." She looked heartbroken. But she was probably somewhere between 7-9 on the so-obese-you-can-barely-stand-on-this scale so she probably shouldn't have asked in the first place.Quote:
Originally Posted by Shiny
I do this to my little sister (who is not fat).Quote:
Originally Posted by Shiny
Don't ever touch me.Quote:
Originally Posted by AmariaSama
I've stopped saying "God bless you" whenever my dad sneezes. :eek:
Why nots? Don't you wanna die? :bigsmile:Quote:
Originally Posted by TigmafuzzDon't ever touch me.Quote:
Originally Posted by AmariaSama
Not... not just yet. And not like that :erm:Quote:
Originally Posted by AmariaSama
Oh.... Well uh.... Okay then. < . <Quote:
Originally Posted by TigmafuzzNot... not just yet. And not like that :erm:Quote:
Originally Posted by AmariaSama