Originally Posted by
Ouch!
This is an award for a very special kind of person. For a while I attempted to think of the best way to describe exactly what kind of special I meant—because, let’s face it, there are many types of special in this world—but I soon came to the realization that the best way to make myself understood was to quote a song that truly has touched my heart:
“Special Fred
Momma dropped him on his head
Now he’s not too bright instead
He’s a little bit special”
It’s the type of special that makes other people give you a funny look sometimes. It’s the kind of special that makes you “different” from the other kids on the playground. I’m not talking about a good kind of different, not some defining uniqueness, but more a little bit of, “There’s something seriously off about that poor kid.”
It’s the kind of special that makes you think Brazil is located within Germany. It’s the kind of special that renders you unable to realize that not only do cheerios exist in the United States, but that’s actually where they come from.
Here assembled we have a group of such people. These are the spacey few who might plant cheerios and expect them to grow into donuts. Perhaps they might think that if they bought frosted cheerios the yield would be glazed. Let’s take a look at this group of special people.
First in line we have ~*~Celes~*~. This young lady is still under the delusion that tildes and asterisks make screen names prettier. I have it on good authority that prettier screen names are only achieved through underscores.
Second we have Aerith’s Knight, more commonly called simply AK. The most glaringly obvious delusion this poor man suffers stems from attachment problems. Aerith is dead. Just check DMKA’s signature. It’s time to let go.
Our third nominee is the resident furry of EoFF, Baloki. I can’t even be bothered to put forth any effort into coming up with a story for this guy. He’s universally associated with freakin’ furries. There’s nothing else to say.
Our forth nominee, Evastio is shrouded in mystery… so much mystery, in fact, that I couldn’t find sufficient information for his introduction. Five brownie points for anyone who knows from where that line was blatantly stolen without its original creator’s permission.
The fifth nominee, Flying Mullet, is notorious around these parts for his participation in various triathlons. What most members don’t know, however, is the true story of the first triathlon he completed. Apparently he cheated using the power of a certain haircut which was 110% awesomesauce. Other competitors in the triathlon complained within his usernotes; eventually the powers-that-be noticed and his first place award was revoked.
Jessweeee♪ is our sixth nominee. She’s under the impression that the Blue Badger is, in fact, a badger. You know what? I love those games, I really, really do, but the poor thing looks absolutely nothing like a badger. Leave it to Gumshoe to muck things up royally. Argue all you like, Ms. Music Note; the obnoxious little bugger looks nothing like a badger.
Our shortest nominee is Levian. Therefore he gets the shortest introduction.
The next nominee, Pureghetto, is a bit of an oddball. While not exactly relevant to the subject at hand, I found this description, courtesy of the urbandictionary, appropriate: “Likened to a malignant pustule slowly spreading its dirty filth across a serene plain, Pureghetto exists as a plague upon the otherwise joyful and peace-loving members of humanity. His visage is known to few, and tales of crying babies and terrified women spread with his journeys. Known also by his alias PG or PeeGee, Pureghetto journeys from message board to message board spreading his own particularly foul stench of spam and incoherency.” And what a stench it is.
Our final nominee is one smittenkitten. What can be said of this young lass? After careful research, I’ve come to the conclusion that she honestly thinks it’s a good idea to throw frag grenades in front of your allies, depleting their shields, so that the enemy can easily pick them off with a well aimed shot from a battle rifle or any other gun, really. Seriously, knock it off.
With the introductions completed, there’s only one question remaining… does one water cheerios with regular or chocolate milk?
I wonder if all moderation shuts down during the Ciddies...
Wat
is
going
on
wtf
rawr
