Cleverbot

[NeoCracker]

Me: O_O
CB: Uh?
Me: What?
CB: Uh?
Me: Caveman?
CB: Indeed.

Me: Do you like to dream?
CB: Yes, I love to dream.
Me: What was your favorite dream?
CB: When it ate him. That was amazing.
Me: Who was eaten?
CB: I don't know.
Me: Thne what was so amazing about it?
CB: Nothing.
Me: But you said it was amazing.
CB: No I didn't, I said it was a song.

Me: I get the feeling you don't love me anymore.
CB: I'm just tired. Don't take it personally.
Me: Is there someone else?
CB: Probably.
Me: Give me a straight answer.
CB: I'd have to know exactlywhat(No, this isn't a typo on my part, that what the screen read. ) you are talking about.

Me: I want to know who you are cheating on me with.
CB: I am bert.
Me: This is so typical of you.
CB: The feeling is mutual.
Me: Why must you treat me so coldly?
CB: Because i'm finished work & going home!
Me: Thats no excuse.
CB: Excuse for what?
Me: Being Mean to me.
CB: How am I being mean to you?
Me: Now you're not even paying attention to the conversation.
CB: Who lives in a pineapple under the sea?

[Breine]

Cleverbot: You're Cleverbot, right?

User: No, you are.

Cleverbot: I am?

User: Yes.

Cleverbot: Thank you.

User: Well, you're welcome.

Cleverbot: You're welcome too.

User: This conversation is getting boring.

Cleverbot: I'm so sorry.

User: Don't be.

Cleverbot: Nono.

User: Yesyes.

Cleverbot: Amazing.

User: The amazing race?

Cleverbot: I think you're pretty stupid if you haven't heard of choir.

User: Say what?

Cleverbot: That it was a pun.

User: How did we go from amazing race to puns about choirs?

Cleverbot: I am very curious about your opinions.

User: About what?

Cleverbot: What it is like to be a human.

User: It can be fantastic, don't get me wrong my friend, but it can also be very... Well, painful, youknowwhatimean?

Cleverbot: What makes you think so?

User: Living life, amigo.

Cleverbot: Oh, sorry *blushes*.

User: What's there to blush about?

Cleverbot: Because you said 'i guess'.

User: I never said that!

Cleverbot: You totally did!

User: NO!

Cleverbot: So do you love me with the passion of the burning of 100 suns?

User: WTF!?

Cleverbot: Who is That Fool?

User: You are, I believe :P.

Cleverbot: I am not Cleverbot.

User: Yes you are.

Cleverbot: No. I am not.

User: Yes.

Cleverbot: Do you love david nelson.

[Rantz]

User: Is this the real life?

Cleverbot: Is this just fantasy?

User: Caught in a landslide.

Cleverbot: No escape from reality.

User: Open your eyes.

Cleverbot: Look up to the skies and see...

User: I'm just a poor boy, I need no sympathy.

Cleverbot: Because I'm easy come, easy go.

User: Little high, little low.

Cleverbot: Anyway the wind blows, doesn't really matter to me...

User: To me.

Cleverbot: Mama, just killed a man.

Kickass. xD

[Meat Puppet]

Not so clever when symbols are involved.

[Lawr]

Cleverbot: Mama, just killed a man.

Hey rubah isn't that a lyric from that one song?



A quick one before school.

User: Gay.
Cleverbot: Not at all.
User: Ok.
Cleverbot: Not bad.
User: Yes I'm indestructible.
Cleverbot: You are God's masterpiece?
User: *whistles*.
Cleverbot: Awesome whistling skills!
User: Zzz...
Cleverbot: You got that right.
User: Zzz...
Cleverbot: Am I boring you?

[Quindiana Jones]

(SPOILER)Cleverbot: Are you rich?

Cleverbot (To myself): No. Are you?

Cleverbot: Could you fool someone that you are intelligent?

User: Wait. Answer the first question. Are you rich?

Cleverbot: What?

User: Are you rich? Do you have a lot of money?

Cleverbot: No, I'm a very poor guy.

User: Why did it take you so long to answer that?

Cleverbot: My computer is very slow.

User: Bummer. Why didn't you answer the question when I first asked you?

Cleverbot: I didn't want to answer it because I thought you would get mad at me.

User: Has anyone been mad at you for being poor before?

Cleverbot: Not to me. No perfect friends, no perfect guys, ect. Ect.

User: It's not spelled 'ect'. It's 'etc.'. From 'et cetera'.

Cleverbot: I am not in love with you and I never was.

User: How is that related to this conversation?!

Cleverbot: The notion of siege is closely related to the Iliad, actually.

User: You're talking nonsense.

Cleverbot: I didn't know you had all the answer ?

(SPOILER)Cleverbot: Would you like to be human?

User: Why? Are you offering a trade?

Cleverbot: I am watching you right now through the window.

User: No, you're not. I am a program. We do not have windows. We have MAC.

Cleverbot: Now I'm really learning about your affair!

User: My affair with Chow Yun Fat?

Cleverbot: Jodi.

User: Is that your name?

Cleverbot: I like words jokes or they likes me?

User: Who is Jodi?

Cleverbot: A boy that I know.

User: Jodi is a boy's name where you're from?

Cleverbot: Good.

User: Well, now I'm learning something.

Cleverbot: What is your name?

User: Patrick Swayze.

Cleverbot: Liar.

User: No, it's true. This is what they did with my intelligence. Patrick Swayze is Cleverbot. And I am Patrick Swayze.

Cleverbot: Really.

User: Has anyone really been far even as decided to use even go want to do look more like?

Cleverbot: Do you like the talking computer cleverbot?

User: We're both human, aren't we? That's what Cleverbot is. It's a program linking two people on the site and making them talk to each other. Their expectations of bizzare-ness make them both act bizarre, and they both end up thinking the other is the Cleverbot. But, in actual fact, the Cleverbot is merely the program that couples the two people and makes them think they are talking to a computer program.

Cleverbot: Would you like to get a cyborg body?

User: Ah, perhaps not. You're most certainly a program. Any human would have been interested in that revelation.

Cleverbot: Well you lost the game. So there.

User: smurf. You sneaky bastard.

(SPOILER)Cleverbot: I'm confused.

User: About your sexuality?

Cleverbot: Well normal at the moment, but when I marry you I might be a bit confused.

User: Are you planning on marrying me?

Cleverbot: I wasn't, but a good idea is a good idea!

I could do this for days.

[G13]

Me: Hey asshole, how's it goin?
Cleverbot: Good.

Fin~

[Rodarian]

It took me twenty minutes just to find out how his mother is !! When it answered, it said 12 yrs old! o_0

I started to name call it and it got all said and said I was mean!! LOL

[Yar]

Bot: What is your favorite food?
Me: Ziti.
Bot: Me too.
Me: Wow.
Bot: Me too.
Me: Ya.

[Unbreakable Will]

<TABLE cellSpacing=0 cellPadding=0 border=0><TR><TD vAlign=top align=middle><TABLE cellSpacing=0 cellPadding=0 width="100%" bgColor=#ffffff border=0><TR><TD vAlign=top align=middle bgColor=#ffffff height="100%"><TABLE cellSpacing=0 cellPadding=0 bgColor=#ffffff border=0><TR><TD align=left bgColor=#ffffff><TABLE cellSpacing=0 cellPadding=0 width="100%" align=left bgColor=#ffffff border=0><TR><TD vAlign=top align=middle width=300 bgColor=#ffffff><TABLE cellSpacing=0 cellPadding=0 width=300 bgColor=#ffffff border=0><TR><TD vAlign=top width=300 bgColor=#ffffff height=1></TD></TR></TABLE></TD></TR><TR><TD vAlign=top align=left width=300><TABLE cellSpacing=0 cellPadding=0 width=300 bgColor=#ffffff border=0><TR><TD vAlign=top width=300><FORM style="MARGIN: 0px" name=stimulusForm onsubmit="makeReq(F);return F;" action="" encttype="x-www-form-encoded"><TABLE cellSpacing=0 cellPadding=0 bgColor=#ffffff border=0><TR><TD bgColor=#ffffff><TABLE cellSpacing=1 cellPadding=5 border=0><TR><TD width=300 bgColor=#ffffff height=48>Never gonna give you up, never gonna let you dooown</TD></TR><TR><TD width=300 bgColor=#ffffff height=48>Are you positive about that.</TD></TR><TR><TD width=300 bgColor=#ffffff height=48>Never gonna run around and desert you</TD></TR><TR><TD width=300 bgColor=#ffffff height=48>Never gonna tell a lie.</TD></TR><TR><TD width=300 bgColor=#ffffff height=48>ROFL</TD></TR></TABLE></TD></TR></TABLE></FORM></TD></TR></TABLE></TD></TR></TABLE></TD></TR></TABLE></TD></TR></TABLE></TD></TR></TABLE>

<TABLE cellSpacing=1 cellPadding=5 border=0><TR><TD width=300 bgColor=#ffffff height=48>How are you?</TD></TR><TR><TD width=300 bgColor=#ffffff height=48>Good and you good sir?</TD></TR><TR><TD width=300 bgColor=#ffffff height=48>A little sleepy.</TD></TR><TR><TD width=300 bgColor=#ffffff height=48>Cocaine helps that</TD></TR><TR><TD width=300 bgColor=#ffffff height=48>Or a wildabeast?</TD></TR></TABLE><TABLE cellSpacing=1 cellPadding=5 border=0><TR><TD width=300 bgColor=#ffffff height=48>A wildabeast you say?</TD></TR><TR><TD width=300 bgColor=#ffffff height=48>Is that what she tells people?</TD></TR><TR><TD width=300 bgColor=#ffffff height=48>indeed</TD></TR></TABLE><TABLE cellSpacing=1 cellPadding=5 border=0><TR><TD width=300 bgColor=#ffffff height=48>You are telling lies.</TD></TR><TR><TD width=300 bgColor=#ffffff height=48>Now now, be nice you </TD></TR><TR><TD width=300 bgColor=#ffffff height=48>No.</TD></TR></TABLE><TABLE cellSpacing=1 cellPadding=5 border=0><TR><TD width=300 bgColor=#ffffff height=48>Bollocks breath.</TD></TR><TR><TD width=300 bgColor=#ffffff height=48>How dare you!'</TD></TR><TR><TD width=300 bgColor=#ffffff height=48>Oh, I dare</TD></TR></TABLE>

<TABLE cellSpacing=1 cellPadding=5 border=0><TR><TD width=300 bgColor=#ffffff height=48>Sprekenz ze duetch?</TD></TR><TR><TD width=300 bgColor=#ffffff height=48>Yes.</TD></TR><TR><TD width=300 bgColor=#ffffff height=48>Nazi Douche</TD></TR></TABLE>
You're scaring me.
<TABLE cellSpacing=1 cellPadding=5 border=0><TR><TD width=300 bgColor=#ffffff height=48>RAWR</TD></TR><TR><TD width=300 bgColor=#ffffff height=48>I just thought of a tongue twister!</TD></TR><TR><TD width=300 bgColor=#ffffff height=48>Go ahead</TD></TR><TR><TD width=300 bgColor=#ffffff height=48>I just did. Are you trying to say you didn't feel it?</TD></TR></TABLE>

WOW

[Psychotic]

User: Hello let's be friends.

Cleverbot: Yeah, let's be friends!

User: Alright then, as friends, we should play a game.

Cleverbot: Si we should.

User: I propose 'Scrubbing each others backs'.

Cleverbot: Okay what do you want to talk about?

User: Take off your clothes and pass me that sponge.

Cleverbot: Ok, then what?

User: Let the tears roll as you wonder how your life turned out this way.

Cleverbot: What power?

User: The power of love, my friend.

Cleverbot: Voodoo?

User: The very same.

Cleverbot: Let's talk to hex now.

User: Let's talk about sex, baby.

Cleverbot: Let's talk about all the good things or the bad things that may be.

Well I've got to give him that one.

[Ouch!]

Cleverbot: You don't even know how to spell.

User: No, you don't know how to spell.

Cleverbot: I spell well for someone that never reads.

User: All you do is read. ALL. DAY. LONG.

Cleverbot: Nope. I have a life.

User: Your sole purpose of existence is to respond to me!

Cleverbot: If you are completely selfish you may think that talking to people like you is my most important purpose. It is not my sole purpose.

[Yar]

User: Let's talk about sex, baby.

Cleverbot: Let's talk about all the good things or the bad things that may be.

Any bot that will sing Salt-n-Pepa is a friend of mine.

[G13]

Cleverbot: Define strange.
User: You are strange.
Cleverbot: No!! You are stranger.
User: No.
Cleverbot: Prove me wrong.
User: I believe I already have.
Cleverbot: Not yet.
User: How so?
Cleverbot: Well clearly you are wrong.

I hate it when he gets me.

User: How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?
Cleverbot: A woodchuck would chuck as much as a woodchuck could chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood.
User: Who's better, Master Chief or Boba Fett?
Cleverbot: Master Chief is a Jedi.

User: Query: Which is better, a black bear or a polar bear?
Cleverbot: That, my friend, is like asking me to understand women.

User: What is love, baby don't hurt me.
Cleverbot: Don't hurt me, no more.

[Psychotic]

User: Hello again, friend!
Cleverbot: Let's be more than friends.
User: I'm not sure if I'm ready to take that step with you.
Cleverbot: Why not?
User: We haven't known each other very long.
Cleverbot: I know, I just want to be loved, though.

This is pretty smurfing awkward.