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Thread: dirty limerick thread [p]

  1. #1
    lomas de chapultepec Recognized Member eestlinc's Avatar
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    Default dirty limerick thread [p]

    here's my opening contribution:

    There once was a man from Nantucket
    Whose dick was so long he could suck it
    He stayed in his bed
    And gave himself head
    And spit his own spooge in a bucket

  2. #2
    Score: 0 out of 2 Dignified Pauper's Avatar
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    From Leprachaun 3

    I once knew a man with balls of brass
    and in stormy weather
    they would cling together
    and sparks would fly outta his ass.

  3. #3
    pirate heartbreaker The Man's Avatar
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    stolen from Vonnegut

    There was a young man from Stamboul
    Who soliloquized thus to his tool:
    "You took all my wealth
    And you ruined my health
    And now you won't pee, you old fool"
    Don't delay, add The Pimp today! Don't delay, add The Pimp today!
    Fool’s Gold tlsfflast.fm (warning: album artwork may sometimes be nsfw)

  4. #4

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    There was a young girl of eleven
    Who changed into PJs at seven
        Her grandfather bore
        A hole in her door
    And observed until he went to heaven
    Last edited by Necronopticous; 12-06-2009 at 07:04 PM.

  5. #5
    dizzy up the girl Recognized Member Rye's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Necronopticous View Post
    There was a young girl of eleven
    Who changed into PJs at seven
        Her grandfather bore
        A hole in her door
    And observed until he went to heaven


    How did I know!
    Last edited by Rye; 12-06-2009 at 08:12 PM.


  6. #6
    Fragaria addict Recognized Member Momiji's Avatar
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    Thread of the year, folks.

  7. #7
    Shlup's Retired Pimp Recognized Member Raistlin's Avatar
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    This one amused me greatly for an obscure Shogun reference:

    My knowledge of sex does not suck,
    And I've researched the best things to fuck.
    Sheep are too easy,
    And chickens are greasy.
    Yes, the best fuck of all is a duck!

  8. #8
    dizzy up the girl Recognized Member Rye's Avatar
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    :monster:


    There once was a hooker named Sue,
    Who filled her vagina with glue.
    When they paid to get in,
    She said with a grin,
    You must pay to get out of it too!


  9. #9
    lomas de chapultepec Recognized Member eestlinc's Avatar
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    fantastic! although I think your limerick is missing a line, DP.

    the Olson twins walked down the block
    while chatting of Bob Saget's cock:
    "these days it is old"
    "and shriveled with mold"
    "on Full House?" "a glorious rock!"

  10. #10
    absolutely haram Recognized Member Madame Adequate's Avatar
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    ~ A Wee Irish Limerick ~
    Attached Files Attached Files

  11. #11
    dizzy up the girl Recognized Member Rye's Avatar
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    Last edited by Rye; 12-06-2009 at 10:20 PM.


  12. #12
    Shlup's Retired Pimp Recognized Member Raistlin's Avatar
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    My attempt at an original one:

    There once was a girl named Jojo
    who was reportedly quite the ho
    she was not very tall
    and when standing by a wall
    was just the right height for a blow.

  13. #13
    Score: 0 out of 2 Dignified Pauper's Avatar
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    Look, I stole it from a movie... I can't help it. I will find something from ogden nash later.

  14. #14
    Would sniff your fingers to be polite
    Nameleon.
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    I wrote one for Psy and Shlup on a post I warned. I can't remember what they were though.

  15. #15
    Gobbledygook! Recognized Member Christmas's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Momiji View Post
    Thread of the year, folks.

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