I've been to Montana, Idaho, Washington, Oregon and California. I genuinely find it difficult to pick my favourite. In Montana, the main attraction was Glacier National Park. I made friends with a mountain sheep called Rodney. Well, I called him Rodney. And he followed me everywhere.

Idaho was alright. Nothing much happened that I remember.

Washington was sweet. Stole some pumice from right outside the gift store, just because they were charging $10 for it. Hell no, I'll get it for free. If you want to know what Mt. St Helens is like, watch The Road. The bits with trees looking all fine and nice, except that they're flattened onto hillsides: that's Helens.

Went down the Oregon coast. Saw some bigass trees. Camped there. place.

I went down to San Fran in California. It was awesome. Some tasty beaches, and the girls are hot. All of them. Every last bloody one.