God exists, and He hates you.

[Slothy]

I don't know if he hates me, but he seems to enjoy ruining my birthdays.

2009: I get fired on my birthday.
2010: My wife gets fired on my birthday.
2011: The police are pulling the body of a good friend of mine out of the river the day before my birthday,

And I just realized that my answer is a lot less humorous than I would have liked for a not so serious thread.

I guess there was that time my ride cymbal fell over beside my bed at 3 in the morning. That was all kinds of smurfing terrifying. I choose to blame god rather than my newbie mounting skills given that god is generally a dick. Seriously, it's in the bible.

[Pike]

What proof do you have that God actively hates you?

Brian Reynolds went to Zynga, started making Facebook games, and said that if he ever gets the rights to SMAC again he is going to turn it into an action-RPG.

Also: the new Xcom game.

inb4 Manus makes fun of me

[Slothy]

What proof do you have that God actively hates you?

Brian Reynolds went to Zynga, started making Facebook games, and said that if he ever gets the rights to SMAC again he is going to turn it into an action-RPG.

Also: the new Xcom game.

Can I change my answer?

[Iceglow]

I'm suffering insomnia severely, I was on the early at work on Monday meaning at the time of writing this post (0600 gmt) I was getting up for work. Tuesday (today) I work a late shift, this means I will finish work at 2200 (gmt) I haven't slept nor do I feel inclined to sleep at this time. I am fairly certain that this, along with the existence of Quin and the fact that the little gaylord cannot ever seemingly communicate with me on XBL (probably because he blocked all communication from me) which makes 4 player instances of Gears, Halo or even just 4 person parties relatively awkward for everyone proves this.

[Bubba]

God definitely exists... he just chooses to ignore me.

I burnt my arm on the oven the other day. Did he give me any warning? No. All I'm asking for is an ethereal voice to say...

"My son, doth though not see the impending danger of offering thy right arm to a heated chamber to retrieve a stuffed-crust BBQ pizza? If though uses the 'spatula of light' thy task will be successful and unnecessary pain avoided. Amen"

Nope, nothing. he probably just sat there, smirking... before swanning off to watch Angel porn on his laptop.

[Quindiana Jones]

I'd prefer my God to shout "Dickhead! Watch the hob! For smurf's sake, I smurfing warned you. This is why I don't bother with you useless s anymore..."

That God would be awesome.

[Tigmafuzz]

Oh, I have much proof that God hates me. Unfortunately, I cannot post any of it, because then he would know I'm aware of it. And then he'd smite me. Thank God this post and my mind are the only two things in this world protected from his view, so he'll never know.

[Jiro]

Hate to break it to you, but he can probably see both :shiny:

[chionos]

Well smurf Jiro, does that mean...

Do you think he saw us?
Shet, I never even thought of that.
Dude I'm freaking out here. You really think he saw us? You smurfing told me that nobody would ever know. Why did you lie to me? I mean, smurf, who else knows? It was a mistake dammit. You smurfing manipulated me. I've just been so lonely lately, and you took advantage of me. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. You stole my innocence you perverted lecherous boy! Don't ever talk to me again!

[Bubba]

Well smurf Jiro, does that mean...

Do you think he saw us?

Alex, I think the question is 'What do you call a blind dinosaur?'