Can't believe it's not butter

[Jiro]

I just made some raisin toast right. Went to get some butter. Put the butter on the raisin toast. You still with me? Good. Okay. So yeah it wasn't actually butter. It was olive oil spread, a healthy(ier?) butter substitute. Sure, that's fine; mum needs to have it due to some health issues. Whatever.

Point is, the tub said extra virgin. First of all, I didn't know my olive oil spread was a virgin. I mean, I'm comforted by the fact that it is; can you imagine eating butter that's had sex before? How does that even work!? UGH. Secondly, what does that even mean? It surely cannot actually refer to the process of reproduction because as far as I am aware, it is not actually like, "alive," and is actually "man made" right?

Guys my butter is freaking me out

[Tigmafuzz]

The butter itself is one large hymen.

You're welcome.

[Quindiana Jones]

You're fine until it winks at you before you stick the knife in.

[Miss Lady Shelly]

Also, if Fabio shows up... run!!!

[Psychotic]

I can taste the difference between sunflower and olive oil spreads. All these years my parents suckered me into eating heathily!

[Faris]

Dude, you have raisin toast. Who cares about the butter when you have raisin toast?!

[Jinx]

SO how did the abstinence butter taste?

[Bubba]

You guys should check out the EOB forums. Celibacy is all those buttery bastards can talk about.

[Shorty]

Dak likes everything virgin. Butter, margaritas and women.

[Sephex]

Dak likes everything virgin. Butter, margaritas and women.

Like that episode of Seinfeld where George tries to eat, watch TV, and have sex at the same time, Jiro tries to experience those things all at once.

[Madame Adequate]

I just made some raistlin toast right.

And he wonders why he has virgin problems!

[Mirage]

I can't believe it's not "I can't believe it's not butter".

[Sephex]

I can't believe it's not "I can't believe it's not butter".

[Jiro]

I just made some raistlin toast right.

And he wonders why he has virgin problems!

I actually typed that first.

[Sylvie]

Why don't you get some real butter, melt it down, lather your *snip*

Call me old fashioned but I'm going to murder you in your sleep. ~Shlup