Lather Me With Sunscreen

[Mercen-X]

If anyone ever hit on me at any one point in my life, I would brag about it.

My cousin once told me a slut from around her neighborhood was checking me out when I had come up for a visit. I had completely oblivious but flattered to boot. My cousin called her a bitch for scoping me out. She claimed it was becuase the chick was a slut and I could do better... but I wonder...


Saying aloud to anyone sounds like bragging even though it's not worth bragging about unless you're sick and perverted but... my 10-year-old cousin has a crush on me. I wouldn't mention it except, no one else in my life (related or not) has ever had a crush on me. I make myself sad.

[Jiro]

Dude I think your cousins all might have a freaky weird thing for you and that's why there was all this "oh she's a slut" nonsense tossed about. Stay away from family luncheons.

[Shlup]

Right now!

There are a lot of weird old men at my work. One of them totally walked way closer to me than necessary in an attempt to brush up against my boob. I dodged him but a few moments later he chatted me up and made an excuse to hug me out of it.

More recently, I was touching something and another middle-aged dude was like "What are you doing?" and I was like "Touching this. I like touching things." and he's all "Heh, she likes touching things." He said that a lot of times. He also said I made his day because I asked him if he knew what a dinglehopper was and he said it was the same as a dingleberry. He was laughing and saying "dingleberry" over and over as he left the store. I would like to meet this dude's dealer.

Do those stories count? I found them amusing.

[Iceglow]

lmao I boast about my feats and conquests. They become the stuff of legends. Psy, loves it and Dan feel's let down if I don't have a new story after a night out. I feel like a God at times to these mere peons

[Rantz]

There are a lot of weird old men at my work. One of them totally walked way closer to me than necessary in an attempt to brush up against my boob. I dodged him but a few moments later he chatted me up and made an excuse to hug me out of it.

Ahh, the "accidental" boob grace. What a legend.

[sharkythesharkdogg]

There are a lot of weird old men at my work. One of them totally walked way closer to me than necessary in an attempt to brush up against my boob. I dodged him but a few moments later he chatted me up and made an excuse to hug me out of it.

Ahh, the "accidental" boob grace. What a legend.

I feel sorry for ladies at concerts. You can observe so many random hands and arms "accidentally" touching strange boobs and asses.

[Mercen-X]

One of my older cousins has called me "sexy." ...he's... just being weird.

A cougar gave me a once-over... but she seemed to be puffing on the MJ, so I doubt that counts.

A friend of a friend sat next to me at a birthday party and didn't recoil when I touched her.

Every girl I've ever had nerve enough to ask out agreed to go out with me. That's like, six girls.
Three of those girls hinted or told me outright we'd just be friends.

I don't remember the point of this post.

[Shiny]

What IS a dinglehopper?

[krissy]

[Mercen-X]

Little Mermaid!

[Quindiana Jones]

"Hey there, ladies. I measure mine in centimetres to make it sound bigger. "

[Rostum]

Either I've never been hit on before, or I'm just too daft to notice it happening.

[Tigmafuzz]

I get hit on ridiculously often.

...But usually by gay guys

[Pike]

"Hey there, ladies. I measure mine in centimetres to make it sound bigger. "

"Mine is so large it stretches all the way from A to Z on the keyboard /smug wait, trout"

[Clo]

I wish I never got hit on. Don't really want the attention of all the creepz.

I live in a city and walk a lot, and it's impossible to walk anywhere without some asshole leaning out his car and revealing what a swell intelligent person he is.