Ohh Jeepers you picked the busiest week in Canada to start this. Ok let me see what I can get going tonight.
Ohh Jeepers you picked the busiest week in Canada to start this. Ok let me see what I can get going tonight.
Why would that matter in a cooking competition?Originally Posted by theundeadhero
I DO WHAT I WANT. YOU HAVE PROBLEM?
We're still missing some entries, and I didn't realize it was a holiday weekend, so you all have an extra day to get them in. Hope everyone makes it.
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Thank goodness. Although I don't have the excuse of the holiday weekend, I got home late from work and fell asleep immediately p much.
Tonight for deals.
On it now!
A few hours left to go. I appreciate everyone that sent their entries in.
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AH!
I forgot! Hang on, I'll write them now.
Oh I was expecting to be PM'd the questions. I didn't realise I had to keep an eye on the thread. How long do I have? Am I too late?
You still have time. GO GO GO.
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Gotta admit I was also expecting a PM but completely my fault, I should've been paying attention.
They should all be sent now!
Sent mine too, although I probably shouldn't have bothered!
Our answers are in and its time to begin voting! Be prepared to spend some time reading, because our contestants love their long answers. Votes will need to be in withing three days, so you have until Friday night to vote.
All five Ms EOFF contestants sent their answers in and we now have eight Mr EOFF contestants. That means we will still only knock out one Ms EOFF this round, but three Mr EOFFs. The contestants who get the lowest amount of votes on their questions will be the ones out.
Please send me your votes in a PM. You can send in one vote for a Ms EOFF and a Mr EOFF for each question, meaning your PM should look something like this:
Ms EOFF
Q1: Contestant two
Q2: Contestant two
Q3: Contestant three
Q4: Contestamt four
Q5: Contestant three
Q6: Contestant five
Mr EOFF
Q1: Contestant four
Q2: Contestant one
Q3: Contestant six
Q4: You get
Q5: the idea
Q6: by now
Okay, here are the answers you'll be voting on. I've put them behind spoiler tags since some can get pretty long.
Ms EOFF
If you were a character in a video game, who would you be?
Contestant 1: I always want to say something cool like THE HERO or THE VILLAIN or YOUR AWESOME ALLY WHO THROWS OUT SASSY ONE LINERS AND IS KIND OF A DICK ASS BUT ALSO LOVABLE AND GETS trout DONE, but realistically I'm probably the NPC who was poorly translated and sells you gear with worse stats than you currently have even though this is the first new settlement you've seen in like, 3 hours.
Contestant 2: Alisaie Leveilleur from FFXIV. Why, you ask (I don't care that you didn't)? She has a chronic case of sass mouth, one that rivals my own.
Contestant 3: I would love to step into the shoes of The Illusive Man from Mass Effect 2 and 3, because I think deep down I'd love to have a go at being a villain, but also because as a character he's so interesting.... What are his true motivations? What would it be like to have a view so warped as his? To sit in that nuanced mind and have all of those resources that could effectively bring so much change, but to use them for such awful purposes - thinking that you're doing the right thing. Wow, like how weird would it be? Also, his office is amazing!
Contestant 4: I would be lord's blade Ciaran because she is a beast!
Contestant 5:
Is Final Fantasy dead, and if so, who killed them and where is the body?
Contestant 1: What's dead may never die, but rises again harder and stronger.
In other words, this series is terrible and always has been. And FFXIV seems to be the exception, but then 95% of the userbase couldn't play the game at launch because of poor design and now it keeps getting DDoS'd sooo.
the body is buried in the garbage heap where it belongs
Contestant 2: Final Fantasy is not dead. Although, to this day I question why I went along with the burial anyway.
Contestant 3: Final Fantasy is dead, Tetsuya Nomura killed it, and the body is just slowly decomposing under his pile of ideas for Final Fantasy XV and Kingdom Hearts 3. There's just slushy, stinky mush now.
Contestant 4: Yes, sadly. Killed by the notorious Call of Duty sending the body of Final Fantasy into the royal garden of Wonderland.
Contestant 5:
Which two Final Fantasy characters would you vote as Mr and Ms Final Fantasy and why?
Contestant 1: Squall and Garnet because ............................
(so much charisma)
Contestant 2: Obviously the most popular characters in the series deserve to be Mr and Ms Final Fantasy, brand recognition and whatnot. They will bring people flocking.
Amarant and Vanille.
Contestant 3: I think Cloud would make a great Mr Final Fantasy because he is probably the most famous Final Fantasy character ever. I also think that Cloud would be the best Ms Final Fantasy because not a single female character has matched her beauty. And I'm a sucker for a cross dresser.
Contestant 4: Squall Leonhart & Rinoa Heartilly because they are the best love story in the series in my opinion.
Contestant 5:
What has Eyes on Final Fantasy done for you?
Contestant 1: Brought me nothing but a lifetime of misery and self-hatred.
In other words: my very best friends and my spouse.
Contestant 2: It has given me endless hours of procrastination material. Which is a double edged sword since I have many other things that I really should be doing with my life that I am actively avoiding.
Also something about friendship if you must get some soppy words.
Contestant 3: I have learned so much from Eyes on Final Fantasy. For instance, that Iceglow ate a nugget of his niece/nephews poop. That Iceglow destroyed his badged up denim jacket by sliding in dog diarrhoea, and that Iceglow has smashed more birds than anyone else.
Truthfully, it has done so much for me. I wouldn't be where I am today, the person that I am today, or why I am the way I am without the influence of Eyes on Final Fantasy. So many people here have had an impact in my life, whether it's through sharing their story, or getting to know them - there's that impact that you feel from everyone. We're a tight-knit and welcoming community of nerds who, in the last few years have really grown personally together. We share the ins and outs of our daily lives with each other and that's bound to really be impactful in the long run. Sometimes when I'm out I'll see something that makes me think of an EoFFer. I think about this place EVERY DAY. It's part of me, and I'm part of it too. We all are. We are Eyes on Final Fantasy.
Contestant 4: It's allowed me to meet lots of nice people from around the world I wouldn't have otherwise met.
Contestant 5:
If you were a beautiful song bird, what sound would you make if your were sucked into a 747's engine?
Contestant 1: lol is this how you ayy dank may may bruh
Contestant 2: The sound of my people. No, not bagpipes.
Contestant 3: The sound of tearing fabric, like a jacquard throw pillow and then that "PLOOF" noise of feathers bursting out. It would be pretty quiet, and not too gross sounding but totally messy.
Contestant 4: EEEEEEKKKKKKKK!
Contestant 5:
If you could be in a rap video with one other contestant who would you choose and which of you would be laying down the beats and which one would be laying down the lyrics?
Contestant 1: Quina, hands down. Me doing the beats because I'm hella awesome and music, Quina doing the lyrics because he talk best way and HE DO WHAT HE WANT
Contestant 2: Psy can do the lyrics, because he's an amusing guy and it will cover up the fact that I cannot do any kind of beat boxing. What can I say? I have no talents.
Contestant 3: I would absolutely be in a rap video with Psychotic. In the video, he would be laying down the beats and I'd be laying down the lyrics, but trust that the whole thing would be a collaborative effort and we'd write it together, and come up with the music together. It would be some comedy rap like early 00's Eminem - but it would be so blindingly white like Vanilla Ice. It would be the most awkwardly amazing thing, like a car crash that you can't take your eyes off.
Contestant 4: escobert would lay down the beat by beatboxing while I rap like Busta Rhymes
Contestant 5:
Mr EOFF
If you were a character in a video game, who would you be?
Contestant 1: I would be Red, the pokémon master!
♪♫♪ I would travel across the land, searching far and wide. Each pokémon, to understand. The power that's inside.♪♫♪
Contestant 2: Duke Nukem. It takes a hell of a long time for me to be ready to perform and when I do, it is a disappointing experience that's over all too quickly.
Contestant 3: Snorlax because I like sleeping and eating. Minus the 1000 pounds.
Contestant 4: Cid in FFVII. Smokin' cussin' and fixin' stuff.
Contestant 5: Well that should be plainly obvious! My character may not be much to look at, they might say weird nonsensical things every now and then, and they may not have much relevance to the plot, but at least they are part of a video game. I'm obviously talking about Psychotic from Death of a Fansite!
Contestant 6: The drunk guy in the bar in Timber from FFVIII
Contestant 7: Good question!
I've thought about this before, mainly because this sounds like something Wolf Kanno would ask. And of course, since Death of a Fansite, I literally am a character in a video game.
So naturally of course, I would be myself. With my mad debuffing skills and questionable emo hair. Which isn't a completely accurate picture of the real me, unless you count 'whining about the heat' to debuff someone's sanity.
I'm assuming picking 'myself' is kind of a cheap answer though, so instead I'll actually give this question some thought. Several candidates flashed through my mind. My original namesake on this site was Balthier Rocks, which kind of says it all, really. He is really dashing, even if he insists on backless sandals.
I also considered Apollo Justice for his impeccable taste in waistcoats and general good nature and sense of justice, and Geralt from The Witcher because then the flirting with Fynn would reach critical mass.
However, I'm going with Sorey from Tales of Zestiria, because he's just a lovely person, with a strong heart, and an unshakable warmth he exudes towards his friends, strangers and even enemies. But more to the point I would eliminate 'ho yay' and just make it full-on in your face explicit 'ho yeah', like God intended.
Contestant 8: Ditto from Pokémon because that way I could be every other character! Providing that I met those characters, of course. Otherwise I'd forever look like a piece of chewed gum, but that's a risk I'm willing to take
Is Final Fantasy dead, and if so, who killed them and where is the body?
Contestant 1: Final fantasy will never die, as long as the fans and players keep it alive with their passion. As long as EoFF exists, Final Fantasy will live on, perhaps as a zombie, but still around.
Contestant 2: Didn't they announce the death of Final Fantasy eight years ago?
Coming soon: Final Fantasy Nova Death Compilation Experience™
- Starring everyone's favourite character Lightning™, now sporting E-Cup breasts and enhanced jiggle physics™
- An emotional narrative experience, as players uncover the moving story of the L'Cie™ as they achieve their transmogrified focus to become Fal'Cie™
- The compilation features an 87 minute CGI movie, a Facebook game and soft drink Potions™ (Japan exclusive)
- Want another Battle on the Big Bridge™ remix? Great, we'll cram another boss battle against Gilgamesh™ in there somehow
- Available on all mobile devices
- Please look forward to it!
Contestant 3: Not dead, but limping. Perhaps it has gout. In which case it's not "Who killed it?", but "Who is feeding it chopped liver?"
Contestant 4: No not dead yet! I think they've realized they need to get back to some of the basics of the series.
Contestant 5: It was Ms. Scarlet with the Junon Cannon in the Cosmo Canyon Observatory!
Contestant 6: Soup Dude from Wall Market. The body is... well, don't try the soup
Contestant 7: Final Fantasy isn't dead I think. I think Final Fantasy is that middle-aged man sitting in his living room lounge at night, drinking beer, kids gone to bed, wondering 'is this all there is?' before changing channels because that's all he can do.
In other words, I think FF is going through a mid-life crisis. It feels like it's lost its sense of direction since FFXIII after the mixed fan reception and the initial launch of FFXIV didn't help either. A lot of their stock went down after that, at least in terms of Final Fantasy.
Who crushed this poor middle-aged man's soul? Just my opinion and it is a very complex topic but I do think 'having too many children' hurt (it's my analogy, roll with it). There used to be a time where a Final Fantasy game was a super big deal. Now, with various spin-offs and mobile games flooding the market, the brand's lost the magic. The significance. I think it needs to recapture that.
It isn't dead. But I don't think a shiny new Regalia is going to fix all their problems.
Contestant 8: Final Fantasy isn't dead...yet. Although I did hear through the grapevine that Tabata was planning on blowing up the Sector 7 reactor located underneath Square Enix HQ, which could kill off FF forever! He was heard saying "If FFXV can't be the new FFVII then no FF can!". Ominous words.
Which two Final Fantasy characters would you vote as Mr and Ms Final Fantasy and why?
Contestant 1: Mr Final Fantasy was a very competitive competition. We had the Blond Haired guy with a big sword, Cloud. The Brown haired guy with a gun sword Squall. The other blond haired guy with the water sword Tidus, all of whom were crushed when Sabin suplexed a train into them. Then Bartz came out of nowhere and charmed all of the ladies to vote for him with his sexy charms.
large pic
Contestant 2: Ms. EoFF would be Celes. Her tragedy driven story is a touching metaphor for the human condition, as we all yearn to love and to be loved in return as we struggle to find our place in a world that can feel isolating and lonely.
Mr. EoFF would be Sephiroth. Sometimes I like to pretend that I am Sephiroth, and imagining that I'm swinging his big sword around lets me briefly compensate for my small penis.
Contestant 3: Mog and Mag. A deeper romance you'll never find.
Contestant 4: Cloud and Rinoa because I think they are perfect for their lead roles in the stories.
Contestant 5: Mog (FFVI) and Mog (FFXIII-2). First of all, moogles are cute and are the best characters of FF. Second, these two mogs are important to their games and also bring together the old schools and new schools of Final Fantasy.
Contestant 6: Mukki from FFVII should hold both titles
Contestant 7: That's a difficult one. There's so many characters to choose from.
I'll go with Ms. Final Fantasy first. I was thinking of a really strong female character and - honestly - there isn't a whole heap (of the games I've personally played), but I settled with Ashe from FFXII.
Besides the fact that she wears the shortest mini-skirt I've ever seen, she's a very strong-willed character who doesn't fit into the classic 'princess' role, at least in my opinion. There's romance in the beginning, but that's brutally cut short, and she mostly relies on her inner strength.
But over the course of the game she does learn to lean on the others a bit. She ultimately carves out her own path. There's a subtle, progressive character development going on that I only really appreciated on a second playthrough.
For Mr. Final Fantasy, I'm kinda hamstrung by not playing FFIX (I can guess Vivi would be a popular pick here).
I mean sure I could say Balthier here because 'tight leather trousers' alone does it for me, but if we're taking the whole character into account...
Hmm, tough one, but I'll go for Ramza, from FFT. I just really liked his character development through the entire story, how he goes from simply wanting to uphold his family name, to exploring the ever-present aspects of good and evil and what 'good' truly means. It was particularly relevant given the world's dubious morality and politicking.
Contestant 8: Ms FF - Yuffie Kisaragi! An unlikely choice, I know, but she'd only end up stealing the title off of the winner anyway so I might as well just give it to her straight up. Besides that I think she's a misunderstood character who tries her best to do her family proud.
Mr EoFF - Vivi. He's such a pleasant young man who struggles to integrate with society and I think winning Mr FF would boost his confidence greatly!
What has Eyes on Final Fantasy done for you?
Contestant 1: Eyes on Final Fantasy has and always will be a place where I can be myself, relax and have a good time. That is more important than anything else. Everyone needs a place to truly be themselves.
Contestant 2: An old constipation remedy of mine was to read EoFF on my phone whilst perched atop the toilet. The turds in my body would come flying out in a desperate attempt to join their brethren in the Eyes on Each Other forum.
Contestant 3: Thanks to EoFF I'm quickly on my way to making my first million in Monopoly cash.
Contestant 4: So much of the last decade and a half. I've met so many people, spent countless hours in chat or playing with EoFFers in games. I've met a couple IRL. It was always a place for me to go and enjoy myself while growing up.
Contestant 5: I've met several great people over the years, and they were all delicious.
Contestant 6: Stunted my professional development
Contestant 7: I'll say the usual things: it's offered me a place to geek out, where I can't really talk about games in real life very much. It's taught me about all kinds of different games and series and I love that people are so happy to tell me all about the colourful and bizarre world of Japanese visual novels. It made me really question the deeper questions in life, like soup. It's also given me friends, and a place to call home even if I left it alone for a while because of University or just plain absent-mindedness.
I remember feeling depressed for a period - don't ask me when, they occur every Tuesday - but it was a few years ago, and I was feeling especially down, and I remember someone telling me, I think it was Freya, to expect something to arrive in the mail. I was like "huh, what exactly" but she said to be patient and sure enough this big cardboard box appears at my mum's house - thanks EoFF for making me lie about the origins of this box - and inside were American chocolates, Hersheys, so clearly you guys didn't love me that much, a Chocobo plushie, poster, a book, but also a lovely handwritten letter and images from a lot of you guys. I think it remains to this day the most lovely, unexpected thing that's ever happened to me.
That's what EoFF has done for me. And I'll never forget it.
Contestant 8: Introduced me to a welcoming community full of wonderful members who I would like to get to know more. It also helps me escape that mundane task known as "life"!
If you were a beautiful song bird, what sound would you make if your were sucked into a 747's engine?
Contestant 1: WWWWWWWWWWWWWRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRYYYYYYYYYYYYYAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHH HHHHH!
Contestant 2: I made a voice file of me making chocobo noises!
Contestant 3:
Contestant 4: Squeeee!
Contestant 5: It would probably sound something like what Raistlin was doing in that bathroom.
Contestant 6: Strangely, it would be the ringtone from the CTU offices in the long-running crime-thriller TV show 24
Contestant 7: "OH SMURF WHAT THE HELL NOT A BLOODY TURBINE-HGEBGHCOVFEFEHEFHESBXBHGHGHGH"
I don't care how beautiful a song bird I was, or how well I could sing. No-one sounds great going into a engine.
Contestant 8: A kind of sound that only someone with a live bird and a mincer would know
If you could be in a rap video with one other contestant who would you choose and which of you would be laying down the beats and which one would be laying down the lyrics?
Contestant 1: If Krissy is participating I would be laying down the lyrics to the sick beats he makes.
If no Krissy then Vermachnatis. I would be doing the beats here, and I have no idea what his lyrics would be but I'm OK with that
Contestant 2: I will team up with Bubba and of course he would be on lyrics, rapping about his Ciddies wins to the tune of Kanye West's ballad, Power.
I'm posting on Eyes on Final Fantasy, posting 'bout my peen to it
Post it better than any member you ever seen do it
Bans for the spambots, someone's gotta do it
I guess every Ciddies winner needs his theme music
No one man should keep winning Best Member
The clock’s ticking the time down to December
Stop posting, there's just one name to remember
(21st-Century Cid's Knight)
The forum's broken, Feedback's closed, Academia's open
You ain’t got no Ciddies to lose, mothersmurfer you trolling
Huh? Mothersmurfer you trolling
With Del Murder and Jinx, they're always moaning
In Bubba's world they're never chosen
So goodnight, Discord, I'll spam you in the morning
Huh? I’ll spam you in the morning
Ciddies are way too much, I need a moment
No one man should keep winning Best Member
The clock’s ticking the time down to December
Stop posting, there's just one name to remember
Till then, smurf that, I'm Funniest Member
(21st-Century Cid's Knight)
Now this will be a beautiful thread
Throw my Ciddies out the window, give them to undeadhero
This will be a beautiful thread
Throw my Ciddies out the window, give them to undeadhero
Do you have the power to let the Ciddies go?
Meanwhile I'll be laying down the beats. Specifically, I'll be laying down beats onto Bubba's square-shaped yet oddly alluring head with a tire iron in the forlorn hope it'll shut him up about the Ciddies once and for all.
Contestant 3: I don't know which screen name Weird Al goes by on here, but him. I would beatbox and he would rhyme.
Contestant 4: Me, N, DK and Meat Puppet would be like the new Beastie Boys with MP on the turntable.
Contestant 5: It would be my good friend Darth Ganon, who lays beats so legit they're canon
I would handle spittin the word, rhymes so phat like pudgy bird
Our lyrics would make your eyes blurry, comin' at you in the dark like a Night Fury
Darth G and I make the rap world look orwellian, we go together better than Formy and Mr. Carnelian
We don't care what no one thinks, respect our beats or get our Jinx!
Contestant 6: I would lay down beats to lyrics from Psy. The level of ineptitude would be so high that people would assume we were a parody act and we'd make millions.
Contestant 7: Bubba. He has the musical talent, and before you go on yes I know playing acoustic doesn't translate to rap but he'll have the rhythm dammit! He'll lay down the beats, and I'll be throwing down 'dem sick rhymes blud'.
It'll still be one of the worst rap videos ever composed, but at least we'll be able to beat these guys:
Contestant 8: Quina on lyrics, me on beats! The rap would be called "99 Problems but this fork ain't one"
There you have it! Lets get some votes in to see who goes on to round two.
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Bloody hell this'll give me something to do on my lunch break.
Also, can self voting be prohibited? It's fine for the Ciddies but it's a bit ehhh in a knock out contest.
Completely missed that this was already happening. Bummer.
Congrats to all the dinners.
I DO WHAT I WANT. YOU HAVE PROBLEM?
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