I always drink too much. Green tea, soda, orange juice, and, because the holiday seasons are coming up, eggnog. I dehydrate myself like nobody's business and keep upset stomachs longer than old widow Retlier keeps those expired coupons for condensed milk.

I also tend to make sure that I am on my way to being decently smashed before stopping. I certainly cannot have one drink; I do not drink for the taste. I usually end up saying something that will have me shunned from human contact for a week, but that's the worst of it. I quit losing my pants after the first time. You learn.