In year 7 or 8 something like that I was going out with this girl and we'd gone over to her boyfriends house so she could dump his sorry ass for two timing on her (yeah I wasn't much better neither was she since she hadn't dumped him before starting to date me but it was a kiddy relationship, one of the last few I had) Well we we're in his lounge and he said "oh stay here I just wanna go shop" and went out his parents were at work and stuff so we waited and well after like 40 minutes (the shop was 2 minutes from his house) we we're really bored of just sitting there with music tv on and kissing and stuff and wanted to go. So we looked for him out of his window since he hadn't taken his keys and noticed he was kissing this girl who he had been cheating on my girl with. Well we didn't know that the girl was one of her close friends and so my girlfriend was severely pissed off with him for it.

I know get to the point will you? that's what you're thinking you're thinking what the heck does this have to do with wild or domestic animals? Well here goes.

Severely pissed off with the guy my then girlfriend goes in to his room and picks up his pet hamster who he apparently really loved, put it in his microwave on full power for 10 minutes (alive) and pressed go, I was so shocked I didn't think to press the wall socket to off and so 2 and a half minutes later this hamster EXPLODES no lies just like the movies it was hillarious, I couldn't believe it, immediately after the hamster blew up my then girlfriend grabbed our coats and led me away from this guys house thus leaving his microwave to cook the remains of his hamster for another 7.5 minutes on full power and locking the guy out so he'd have to wait untill his mom came home.

I learnt to be very careful of that girl.

Another funny story or quite funny if you look at it right.

Ever here the saying "hitting 2 birds with 1 stone?" Well there were a couple of wood pidgeons in a tree in my garden and they were severely annoying me so I threw a piece of flint up in to the tree to scare them off. Well the flint strikes the tree and splits in to two and the two incredibly sharp pieces of flint in turn fly off towards the birds and strike home around the throat area thus killing BOTH birds! I did not eat pidgeon pie but in the morning they we're gone, I guess the local foxes liked the food.

A wierd one was what a friends mom did to the neighbours cat who pooped in her house if it could get in, she grabbed it and rammed a pepper pot up it's ass and shook it before letting it walk out with the pot still in it's ass.