Where does a general keep his armies?

[Lawr]

[Markus. D]

I love these jokes, they always bring on an exhausted-like laugh... like, I'm ACTUALLY in a genuine sense... but it sounds sarcastic.

[Flying Mullet]

Two snowmen are standing in a field. One looks at the other and asks, "Do you smell carrots?"

[Timekeeper]

A man runs into a doctors surgery and yells "Teepee wigwam, teepee wigwam!"
"Relax" says the doctor "You're two tents."

[blackmage_nuke]

A guy goes to his doctor and says "I think Im a guitar" and the doctor says, there's no need to fret.

[Jiro]

Why do elephants have big ears?
(SPOILER)Because Noddy didn't pay the ransom

Why did the Trekkie get beat up at a Star Trek convention?
(SPOILER)Because he wasn't nerdy enough

Why do you people come here?
(SPOILER)Final Fantasy

Geddit?

[Timekeeper]

Why did the plane crash?
(SPOILER)The pilot was a banana.

Why did the boy fall off the swing?
(SPOILER)Someone threw a fridge at him.

[DK]

I think my favourite bad joke of all time was from my friends little sister a long time ago. I think she was only like 4-5 or something. She came up all "Why did the chicken cross the road?" and when we said we did not know and asked her to inform us she screamed "A BRICK!!!" and ran away cackling like a witch. It made no sense and it was awesome

A man walks into a bar, he says "ouch"

also, this

[Rocket Edge]

What do you call Bob the Builder during the recession?

Ans: (SPOILER)Bob

[Bunny]

A man walks into a bar, he says "ouch"

Three blondes walk into a building, you'd think one of them would have seen it.

[Ouch!]

What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs hanging on your wall? (SPOILER)Art.

[Timekeeper]

Why did the bald man cut a hole in his pocket?

(SPOILER)So he could run his fingers through his hair


Sure these might be a bit too punny and most of them stink (I'm probably a bit too much of a pungent myself) but we have to keep this thread alive

[Flying Mullet]

Here's a little gem my coworker just shared with me and I couldn't not share it:

Why did the one-armed man cross the road?

To get to the second-hand store!

[I Don't Need A Name]

What do you call a man with a bird on his head?
(SPOILER)Cliff

What do you call a man with a spade in his head?
(SPOILER)Doug

Women are like vacuum cleaners:
If they stop sucking, change the bag.

[I Took the Red Pill]

q: why couldn't the kitten drink its milk?

a :(SPOILER) its head was nailed to the floor