Abstraction

[Kalilung]

Do you like swimming? Do you wear goggles? Is wearing flippers in a swimming pool dumb (the answer is yes)? Do you burn like the Irish when exposed to sunlight? Let us talk about pools.

Wearing Flippers in our pool is dumb because it never gets any deeper than 5 feet. And that 5 feet is like this narrow band of awesome where you can do forward somersaults, swim-start dives, and fun things without hitting your head on the floor. Once you wander outside that watery Alsace-Lorraine, however, you're in for a world of skinned knees and knuckles. I am still, however, totally excited that this summer is The Summer of the Pool.

Ideally, what do you like eating for breakfast? You did include bacon in that, right? Are you a horrible person who likes scrapple (no one should like scrapple)? Or are you an eat-right-eat-healthy person who lives a life of cuisine misery? Tell me about your breakfasts.

O Glorious Firstmeal, how irritating you are to make. Lynx, you philistine. Scrapple is clearly a gift from the universe; one with a little card that says "I love you and want you to eat all the pig." That said, it's all smoothies from here on out, baby. I haven't consumed a cooked firstmeal for at least a month.

It is not funny to throw handicapped people into swimming pools. Discuss other non-funny things or, in an exciting turn of events, discuss funny things.

While there is nothing funny about throwing a handicapped person into a pool, a pool can be a nice place for people who cannot walk to get their exercise.

Today I saw a very tiny child kicking the pool in its mother's arms. That also was not funny, but was pretty cute.