have u ever been hit in the bollock by ur belt?

This happens to me so often you'd think I'd of triggered on by now but nope. Puttin on jeans while sittin down, u bring them up over ur knees & as gravity is a bitch ur belt buckle falls down while ur still pullin the jerans up & SOMEHOW the time is always just right enough for that big metal bastard to swing down again & strike my unsuspecting bollock full on. The pain is almost as bad as the 'FOR smurf SAKE NOT AGAIN' annoyance.

Anyways, belts, buckles, balls. Anyone else been cursed with these Gravity + Motion x Timing = pain shenannigans? It can't be just me. Mind you my belt is huge...almost as big as me bollox.

I avoid this problem in two manners

1) I generally do not wear belts
2) I do not have testes.

*hi5 rubah*

I avoid this problem in two manners

1) I am smarter than you

Maybe my belt buckles aren't big and heavy enough, but even when I do this, it doesn't hurt a great deal.

BALLS OF STEEEEL >.<

That's why boys should be able to retract their balls inside of them at will, like me. :colbert:

That is horrifying.

Rye. D:

No, this does not happen to me. I don't put on jeans while sitting, nor do my jeans have belts pre-installed.

i nail myself at least 3 times a week at work so im building resistance

Quote:

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Originally Posted by rubah

I avoid this problem in two manners

1) I generally do not wear belts
2) I do not have testes.

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Amen sister!

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Bunny

I avoid this problem in two manners

1) I am smarter than you

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Never done it.
Sitting down on a bike seat on one of them REALLY hurts though.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Bunny

I avoid this problem in two manners

1) I am smarter than you

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This.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Rye

That's why boys should be able to retract their balls inside of them at will, like me. :colbert:

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Oh my... what the... :(

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Mo-Nercy

Maybe my belt buckles aren't big and heavy enough, but even when I do this, it doesn't hurt a great deal.

BALLS OF STEEEEL >.<

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I have a particularly large & heavy buckle on my belt to match the particularly large & heavy penis it helps to cage. Tis Diesel & cost a mighty £30.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Bunny

I avoid this problem in two manners

1) I am smarter than you

---

well, aren't we little lord fontletwat, I suppose you've never got your left foot caught in the right leg of ur pyjama bottoms while walking up the stairs with tea & toast & land face first in the toast either have you?....Meh at least I have good looks & big tackle. fu smart ppl. I get accident prone sex, and lots of it

Nigga, I get more ass than a toilet seat.

And my buckle > your buckle.
http://cn1.kaboodle.com/hi/img/2/0/0...AAAAAGemsQ.jpg

Quote:

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Originally Posted by NorthernChaosGod

Nigga, I get more ass than a toilet seat.

And my buckle > your buckle.
http://cn1.kaboodle.com/hi/img/2/0/0...AAAAAGemsQ.jpg

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Are you challenging my buckle? Cause that just looks like a knit comb that only looks like a skull by accident.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Rye

That's why boys should be able to retract their balls inside of them at will, like me. :colbert:

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Everything makes sense now :quina:

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Cuchulainn

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Bunny

I avoid this problem in two manners

1) I am smarter than you

---

well, aren't we little lord fontletwat, I suppose you've never got your left foot caught in the right leg of ur pyjama bottoms while walking up the stairs with tea & toast & land face first in the toast either have you?....Meh at least I have good looks & big tackle. fu smart ppl. I get accident prone sex, and lots of it

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Nope, never had any of that happen to me. I'm sorry you're so clumsy, I understand how that must be for you. I'm happy getting laid without hurting myself or making myself look dumb.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Bunny

Nope, never had any of that happen to me. I'm sorry you're so clumsy, I understand how that must be for you. I'm happy getting laid without hurting myself or making myself look dumb.

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:roll2 Have a day off fella.

Being smart isn't really hard work so I'll pass

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Bunny

Being smart isn't really hard work so I'll pass

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No..you're being an arrogant dick. that seems worryingly easy to you too.

Yup. I even put it on my résumé.

Wow it's a pair of bollocks!

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Old Manus

Wow it's a pair of bollocks!

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olo

Quote:

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Originally Posted by rubah

I avoid this problem in two manners

1) I generally do not wear belts
2) I do not have testes.

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However, I do feel for you, Cuch. :cat:

My belt is always removed before taking off pants, so this is not an issue for me.

I wear pants that fit

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Rase

My belt is always removed before taking off pants, so this is not an issue for me.

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This. My belt buckles aren't huge anyway, because I don't need them to bring any extra attention :D

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Cuchulainn

Quote:

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Originally Posted by NorthernChaosGod

Nigga, I get more ass than a toilet seat.

And my buckle > your buckle.
http://cn1.kaboodle.com/hi/img/2/0/0...AAAAAGemsQ.jpg

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Are you challenging my buckle? Cause that just looks like a knit comb that only looks like a skull by accident.

---

The Punisher > You

Occasionally I will accidentally sit on those suckers, which is quite an experience. Also, sometimes when I’m trying to give people some room at work, I forget I have balls and end up crunching them into the corner of a table (this happens often so I’m pretty sure I’ve killed my lineage).

OK, I've actually sat on my sack before. It was a hot summer day and they were hanging low.

No, but I've been hit in the balls by the toilet seat lid/cover/(whatever you english speaking people call it) as it fell down after I took a crap.

:bou::bou::bou::bou:, this thread ruined my turkey sandwich.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by NorthernChaosGod

OK, I've actually sat on my sack before. It was a hot summer day and they were hanging low.

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I do not want to know about your sagging bollocks dude!

Quote:

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Originally Posted by demondude55

:bou::bou::bou::bou:, this thread ruined my turkey sandwich

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That's a funny collective name for them.

:eek:

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Leeza

Quote:

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Originally Posted by rubah

I avoid this problem in two manners

1) I generally do not wear belts
2) I do not have testes.

---

However, I do feel for you, Cuch. :cat:

---

How did I miss this? You made me smile. Ah I'm comforted by the simplest of things. We'd make an awsome couple.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by NorthernChaosGod

OK, I've actually sat on my sack before. It was a hot summer day and they were hanging low.

---

:onoes:

I've been hit by my belt buckle but not on an everyday basis. Maybe twice in my life. Everything else though has a charted course to the stones. Pets jumping up on my lap, things tossed to me, my girlfriend's limbs while wrestling. Even just a small child running past will throw a tiny fist into my junk. I think maybe my balls were horrible people in a past life. :(

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Cuchulainn

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Bunny

Being smart isn't really hard work so I'll pass

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No..you're being an arrogant dick. that seems worryingly easy to you too.

---

Simmer down naw, you two. This is about the most important thing you guys will ever need to know -- how to avoid getting hit in the balls.

Rule Number One
Don't wear oversized belts.

Rule Number Two
Don't be a man.

Problem solved.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Rye

That's why boys should be able to retract their balls inside of them at will, like me. :colbert:

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Where is the do not like button when I need it?!

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Rye

That's why boys should be able to retract their balls inside of them at will, like me. :colbert:

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:|

Rye for creepiest poster ever?

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Shiny

Rule Number One
Don't wear oversized belts.

Rule Number Two
Don't be a man.

Problem solved.

---

interesting....I think I'll try the second one first.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Rye

That's why boys should be able to retract their balls inside of them at will, like me. :colbert:

---

The idea of this is utterly horrifying. :eek:

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Meat Puppet

Occasionally I will accidentally sit on those suckers, which is quite an experience. Also, sometimes when I’m trying to give people some room at work, I forget I have balls and end up crunching them into the corner of a table (this happens often so I’m pretty sure I’ve killed my lineage).

---

I had a Construction Core class in HS that had these tall stool/chair things to sit on, it never failed that whenever I sat down to quickly I'd sit on my junk. :(

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Guardian XIII

Quote:

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Originally Posted by NorthernChaosGod

OK, I've actually sat on my sack before. It was a hot summer day and they were hanging low.

---

:onoes:

I've been hit by my belt buckle but not on an everyday basis. Maybe twice in my life. Everything else though has a charted course to the stones. Pets jumping up on my lap, things tossed to me, my girlfriend's limbs while wrestling. Even just a small child running past will throw a tiny fist into my junk. I think maybe my balls were horrible people in a past life. :(

---

I feel your pain sir.


Anyone ever gotten your junk caught in the zipper? it's happened to me twice, once when I was a kid and the again when I was 18. ;~; That :bou::bou::bou::bou: hurts yo.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Bunny

I avoid this problem in two manners

1) I am smarter than you

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Ditto

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Cuchulainn

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Shiny

Rule Number One
Don't wear oversized belts.

Rule Number Two
Don't be a man.

Problem solved.

---

interesting....I think I'll try the second one first.

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You'll be a better person for it :greenie:

Quote:

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Originally Posted by UnbreakableWill

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Rye

That's why boys should be able to retract their balls inside of them at will, like me. :colbert:

---

The idea of this is utterly horrifying. :eek:

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Meat Puppet

Occasionally I will accidentally sit on those suckers, which is quite an experience. Also, sometimes when I’m trying to give people some room at work, I forget I have balls and end up crunching them into the corner of a table (this happens often so I’m pretty sure I’ve killed my lineage).

---

I had a Construction Core class in HS that had these tall stool/chair things to sit on, it never failed that whenever I sat down to quickly I'd sit on my junk. :(

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Guardian XIII

Quote:

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Originally Posted by NorthernChaosGod

OK, I've actually sat on my sack before. It was a hot summer day and they were hanging low.

---

:onoes:

I've been hit by my belt buckle but not on an everyday basis. Maybe twice in my life. Everything else though has a charted course to the stones. Pets jumping up on my lap, things tossed to me, my girlfriend's limbs while wrestling. Even just a small child running past will throw a tiny fist into my junk. I think maybe my balls were horrible people in a past life. :(

---

I feel your pain sir.


Anyone ever gotten your junk caught in the zipper? it's happened to me twice, once when I was a kid and the again when I was 18. ;~; That :bou::bou::bou::bou: hurts yo.

---

obscure reference: There's something about Mary. "how'd you get the beans above the frank?" :joker:

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Rye

That's why boys should be able to retract their balls inside of them at will, like me. :colbert:

---

Once, I was kneed in the crotch. This happened to me!

I don't wear belts. My booty is glorious enough for my pants to stay up.

Can't say it has happened to me.

All my problems to do with getting injured down below come about due to incredibly hot women eagerly thrusting themselves towards my genitalia with desire. My big testicles and my big wang. And I'm smart. With big testicles. And it doesn't hurt much because they're good strong built up testicles. Also, I like wood and cars and manly things. Did I mention getting drunk and how far I can urinate? I'm buff, too. With big testicles. YEAH.

Mmm, bandwagons.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Kentarou

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Rye

That's why boys should be able to retract their balls inside of them at will, like me. :colbert:

---

Once, I was kneed in the crotch. This happened to me!

---

This reminds me of an Oliver Beene episode. "RETRACTED TESTICLLLLLLLLLE!"

Quote:

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Originally Posted by doeboyfresh14

Quote:

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Originally Posted by UnbreakableWill

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by Rye

That's why boys should be able to retract their balls inside of them at will, like me. :colbert:

---

The idea of this is utterly horrifying. :eek:

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by Meat Puppet

Occasionally I will accidentally sit on those suckers, which is quite an experience. Also, sometimes when I’m trying to give people some room at work, I forget I have balls and end up crunching them into the corner of a table (this happens often so I’m pretty sure I’ve killed my lineage).

---

I had a Construction Core class in HS that had these tall stool/chair things to sit on, it never failed that whenever I sat down to quickly I'd sit on my junk. :(

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by Guardian XIII

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by NorthernChaosGod

OK, I've actually sat on my sack before. It was a hot summer day and they were hanging low.

---

:onoes:

I've been hit by my belt buckle but not on an everyday basis. Maybe twice in my life. Everything else though has a charted course to the stones. Pets jumping up on my lap, things tossed to me, my girlfriend's limbs while wrestling. Even just a small child running past will throw a tiny fist into my junk. I think maybe my balls were horrible people in a past life. :(

---

I feel your pain sir.


Anyone ever gotten your junk caught in the zipper? it's happened to me twice, once when I was a kid and the again when I was 18. ;~; That :bou::bou::bou::bou: hurts yo.

---

obscure reference: There's something about Mary. "how'd you get the beans above the frank?" :joker:

---

Haha, let me rephrase that, anyone ever gotten your crank stuck in your zipper? Not your bollock. :lol:

Quote:

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Originally Posted by leader of mortals

I don't wear belts. My booty is glorious enough for my pants to stay up.

---

this

Also lol, OP seems like he's trying to act like an internet tough guy. ur so kewl dewd

Oh the only thing far worse is if we'd zip our flies a lil too fast resulting in our manhood being 'zipped'....


Now that is painful...

Quote:

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Originally Posted by rubah

I avoid this problem in two manners

1) I generally do not wear belts
2) I do not have testes.

---

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Bunny

I avoid this problem in two manners

1) I am smarter than you

---

I lol'd

The worst kind of ball pain is when something just catches one. Like a powerful near-miss. A flick to the bollock by a strong forefingered assailant is much more excruciating than a knee to the balls. The stabbing agony in the bollock itself, spreading to a dull pain the stomach and then the weird feeling in the throat like when you crack your tailbone ("oh man, I'm going to throw up, I'm going to throw up....wait no I'm not").

Quote:

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Originally Posted by PuPu

Also lol, OP seems like he's trying to act like an internet tough guy. ur so kewl dewd

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He's Irish. It's a scientifically proven fact he is. :colbert:

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Guardian XIII

Quote:

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Originally Posted by PuPu

Also lol, OP seems like he's trying to act like an internet tough guy. ur so kewl dewd

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He's Irish. It's a scientifically proven fact he is. :colbert:

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Irish people don't believe in science. They believe in booze and yelling at the sky monsters.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Bunny

Irish people don't believe in science. They believe in booze and yelling at the sky monsters.

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AND BELIEVING IN ANYTHING ELSE IS PURE FOLLY.

How do you even zip... yourself while wearing underwear?

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Bunny

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by Guardian XIII

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by PuPu

Also lol, OP seems like he's trying to act like an internet tough guy. ur so kewl dewd

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He's Irish. It's a scientifically proven fact he is. :colbert:

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Irish people don't believe in science. They believe in booze and yelling at the sky monsters.

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LOL