I was a child left unattended! It's not my fault!
I was a child left unattended! It's not my fault!
OMG WHAT THE HELL!!!Originally Posted by Pike
When I was about seven years old I shoved a kid in a school locker and shut it. No one knew the combination and he was stuck there until the janitor came and sawed the lock off.
Me and my brother once played tennis with the hamster. This is nowhere near as bad as it sounds! We were sitting on the floor right next to each other using soft cushions and basically just sort of flinging him back and forward onto the cushions. He was absolutely fine and perfectly happy afterwards, and lived to the grand old age of four (which is ridiculously old for a Syrian hamster) but I still feel awful. Poor little guy!
Kicked my Dad in the balls with a Judo kick
My sister got a balloon one day. She loved that balloon. I didn't have a balloon. That was enough for me to be a dick.
I asked to see the balloon for a minute. I walked outside. And let it go. I watched that little balloon fly high into the sky until it couldn't be seen anymore.
My sister was inconsolable.
I was always the kid that had things done to him, never the doer. For example, my best friend in childhood once tied me to a tree (because why the hell not?), then his parents called him in for dinner. He left me there.
Then forgot about the fact that he had tied me to a sodding tree.
When I was a kid, my three girl cousins slept in the basement of their house. There was a a vent in the basement that opened up to the floor in the living room, so you could hear things back and forth.
One night I spent the night with them, and their grandpa babysat us while all the parents went out. We kept calling him a dick and an asshole through the vent. (To be fair, he was).
ohmigosh.
I forgot about this. I was in like 7th grade and before classes start, all the students have to sit in the gym in the bleachers and on the basketball court organized by grade/class. I was also in band and band class was during like the first hour of the morning during homeroom. I thought this kid was talking smack and so I got up, pulled him up by his overalls, and threw him down the bleachers while we were waiting for our band teacher.
IDK why I didn't get in mega trouble for that. The gym teacher chewed me out for like 5 minutes and then sent me back to where I was sitting.
Then my best friend at the time, her little brother was like mentally retarded somehow, but in a really bad way. He was a major trout head (once he shoved a PB&J sammich into the VCR. He was already in like 3rd grade or so)..ANYWHO. My bff's house had an underneath bit where all the insulation was and a door to get in. We'd make her little brother go in there, shut and lock the door from the outside, and run around screaming & banging on the walls of it to scare him.. We pretended we were demons. He'd get soooo scared.
Then in 8th grade, same friend and I, would go behind the sink/bulletin board where all the backpacks and coats were hung and steal everyone's snack money. We nearly got busted once, but the principal and our homeroom teacher didn't have actual proof so they couldn't pin it on us. They made our class write down on a piece of paper who they thought it was and nearly everyone wrote me and the friend.. One girl put "IDK who did it .. (.... But it wasn't me.)". XD
And then when I was 3, I'd been hanging out with my brother and his friends while they were working on a car or something.. And of course they'd been cursing. So when I went home, I ran in, looked at my dad and said "HI MOTHERCHUCKER!" Oooooo my dad was -pissed-. He was like "WHERE. Is. Your. Brother.!??"
I am glad I never was a child.
Oh wait, I remember one. I once forged a really horrible letter to one of the friendly girls in my class and had it pinned on a girl that nobody liked. As in, I genuinely copied her handwriting and everything, and nobody ever found out it wasn't from her.
I was a good kid, all I did was drop a cat in a kiddie pool because she needed a bath.
Also I like some things on fire and ran to the bathroom to see if I was fast enough to put it out without getting burned.
Also I tore chords out of phones for like, no reason.
Then there was that time I threatened genocide when I was like 7, because of reasons that don't exist.
And the time I I poured every liquid in the house in a sink in hopes of making a bomb.
And the time I choked a kid for taking a basketball away.
And the time I threatened to have Satan beat up someone if he didn't do what I said.
And the time I called a friend of mine an Elephant over and over because I don't know why, then he had a nervous breakdown.
Then that time I gave into peer pressure and turned on a friend.
See, compared to you I was a good kid.
This post brought to you by the power of boobs. Dear lord them boobs. Amen
How old are the children? What ages? Some people act like children far longer than others.
Age 3: Crawled or waddled out of the garage at night, and went missing for 24 hours. Some random nice lady had found me and was taking care of me.
Age 8: I caught craw daddies and released them in the road to have them try to survive against traffic
Age 10: I caught a field on fire with some friends
Age 11 :I pointed an unloaded gun as a girl that was picking on my younger brother
I smashed a frog to see what would happen
I went into construction sites on their day off, and would bust out all the windows in whatever house they were working on
Age 15 I ran away from TN in hopes of reaching California..I was gone a month before caught, and had no real reason to runaway except for the sense of a great adventure. Probation..nearly gave my mom a heart attack.
Things progressively got more crazy and adventuress every year, but I guess I'll stop at age 15. Some of the stuff that happened after that, especially at age 19, I probably should never speak of to anyone.
I just remembered another one. One time, my family met up with one of my uncles and his family for a week in... Chicago, I think. A cousin who is around my age and I spent that entire week trying to convince her little sister that we were both actually aliens who had essentially infiltrated the family to learn the ways of humans so we could all infiltrate Earth and take over. My cousin and I never actually planned this, we just kept going along with each other. We never broke character and talked in great detail about our alien society and technology. We also tried to convince the younger cousin that we were going to take her back with us for experiments because she had found out too much. The only time we actually told my younger cousin that we actually were not aliens was just before we parted ways on the final day of the vacation. She was terrified of us that entire week and for quite a while after that.
I used to threaten my mom with running away.
.... When I was 7.
I packed up my Spotty Dotty suitcase and get my warm clothes on and tell her I was leaving.. She hadn't been paying attention though. I made it to the garage way back in the woods in our back yard and stayed there for awhile. I finally gave up and went home. My mom still hadn't noticed.
I was at my Granny Sadie's once and it was the last day there, I was flying back to England in a few hours. Now I absolutely hated and feared going back to England because as a kid, everything was trout, whilst Granny Sadie was actually good to me and loved me. So I understandably always made a fuss.
This time though, I just straight up ran away. I left a note that was like "Dear Granny, I have run away. I will not come back until I don't have to go back to England." I wandered up towards Scrabo Tower and imagined meeting a group of other runaways who would take me in and we'd all live together in the hills and stuff.
When I actually reached Scrabo Tower I realized that not only was this highly unlikely, but I had no way to get food or water. So I sheepishly went back to Granny's house.But she called the airport and got me on a later flight and because she's bro she didn't tell my folks or anything so I didn't get in any trouble.
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