Ignoring that you've effectively told him so in this thread:

- Lead him on a wild goose chase to a foreign country, promising your presence
- Ensure that he arrives in a war torn section with a safezone miles away
- When/if he is able to call you, say you had no idea this was going to happen and are waiting in the safezone
- Make an anonymous call to the safezone's consulate that a terrorist with his description is going to demand shiny epic purplies
- ???
- asl
- profit