learning french

**Pumpkin** · 08-11-2011, 06:34 PM

Citizen Bleys, I have to say, your french seems very good. Ben can be slang for bien but it would be more like "bein" as in "bein non" which I use quite often.

SIDE LESSON ON FRENCH CANADIAN SLANG a.k.a Quebecois (this most likely does not apply to french spoken in france which is much more proper.)
*This is an actual phone conversation between my boyfriend (let's call him Josh...cuz that's his name) and his friend Eric. It was put on speaker phone, which is how I got both ends of the convo. I most certainly was NOT evesdropping on the other line.....ahem.

Josh: Oui, allo?
Eric: Yo, what's up man? (<---great french)
Josh: Je fais juste relaxer, garder du TV. Puis, que'ce que tu fais de bon, toi?
Eric: Rien, man. ça te tante tu de chiller?
Josh: Non, pas à soir. Appelle-moi demain.
Eric: OK, je t'apelle demain.
Josh: OK, ciao
Eric: Ciao.

Now here is what SHOULD be said.

Josh: Oui, bonjour?
Yes, hello? (Bonjour actually means good day, but is used as hello. If you want it to mean good day it would be bon jour, with a space)
Eric: Qu'est-ce qui ce passe?
What is going on? (Or what is up?)
Josh: Je relaxe et je regared de la télévision. Qu'es-ce que tu fais de bon?
I am relaxing and watching some television. What are you doing good?
Eric: Rien. ça te tenterais-tu de passer du temps ensemble?
Nothing. Do you feel like spending time together?
Josh: Non, pas à soir. Apelle-moi demain.
No, not tonight. Call me tomorrow.
Eric: D'accord. Au revoir.
Alright. Goodbye
Josh: Au revoir.
Goodbye.

*Terminaisons des verbes (for the more advanced student)
Je (I) can finish with S-E-X-AI
Tu (You) can finish with S-X
Il/elle (Him/her/it) can finish with C-A-D-E-T
Nous (Us/we) generally is ONS but occasionally MES
Vous (Them/they) generally is EZ but occasionally ES or TES
***Vous is also used as the polite way of saying you (instead of tu)
Ils (Him/her/it plural) is generally NT

I will now show you the most basic french verbs:

Verbe être à l'indicatif présent (To be)
Je suis
Tu es
Il est
Nous sommes
Vous êtes
Ils sont

Verbe avoir (To have)
J'ai
Tu as
Il a
Nous avons
Vous avez
Ils ont

*I am not able to conjugate verbs in that manner in English because I stopped going to an English school when I was 7. If anyone wants to teach me, I would be happy to learn.

**Citizen Bleys** · 08-12-2011, 03:16 AM

Originally Posted by shion

Citizen Bleys, I have to say, your french seems very good. Ben can be slang for bien but it would be more like "bein" as in "bein non" which I use quite often.

Hahahahaha

You just said that to the man who once said "J'ai un petit feu de français." ("I have a little fire of French"; I meant to say I understood a little bit.)

I don't speak French, but if I get drunk enough, I start to think--wrongly--that I can. It comes from living in New Brunswick. Constant exposure and whatnot. I think I also once responded to "Parle-tu français?" with "Je n'suis pas si bien dakara una mumento por favor" before running to find someone who actually could speak the language.

**Peegee** · 08-12-2011, 08:06 PM

my head is full of jackie chan

**Citizen Bleys** · 08-12-2011, 08:10 PM

The galaxy is turning into Tomokazu Seki.

**Old Manus** · 08-12-2011, 08:48 PM

Rydych i gyd yn ffagots

Bonsoir

**Pumpkin** · 08-12-2011, 08:53 PM

My bad, Citizen Bleys. From your posts you seem to speak it well enough. Other than the calçon thing.

I also want to apologize, I made an error.
Vous is 'you' plural, like you guys, when adressing a group of people
Ils is them, they, it plural.

LESSON 2 -Proper french insults:

Alot of these are what my teachers like to call "anglaisismes" meaning english words made to sound french. Alot of them are spelt almost the same as in english but are pronounced differently.

Ta face (meaning, obviously, your face. Face, however, is pronounced more like fass.)
or you could say
Ton visage
meaning, your face.

Ta mère, meaning your mom.

Gros laid, meaning big ugly.
*** laid and lait are pronounced the same in french. Laid means ugly, lait means milk. Technically if spoken, someone could be calling you either big ugly, or big milk. Which is more insulting? I dunno.

Mon cue, meaning my the-other-word-for-butt.
Mes fesses means the same thing.

Chienne femelle
Female dog

Trou-de-cue
a**hole

Personne dont les parents n'était pas marrié au temps de sa naissance.
Person who's parents were not married at the time of their birth. (meaning the word I am not sure I am allowed to post)

Different ways of saying "shut up"or "stop talking":
Ferme-la.
La ferme.
Ferme-toi la.
Ferme-toi la dont.
Ferme toi la yeule.
Ferme ta yeule.
Ferme-toi la, ta yeule.
Ta yeule.
Ferme ta boîte.
Ferme-toi la boîte.
Ferme dont ta boîte.
Arrête de parler.
Arrête dont de parler.

Ignorant (ignorant for a male)
Ignorante (ignorant for a female)

stupid (male)
stupide (female)

con (slang word for stupid for a male)
conne (for a female)

débile (fancy way of calling someone stupid, works for both genders)

Gros (big/fat for a male)
grosse (for a female)

laid (ugly for a male)
laide (ugly for a female)

This is the general. They can be combined:

Ta mère est grosse, laide et débile. Je n'aime pas sa face.
Your mom is big, ugly and stupid. I don't like her face.

*** face is feminin, so you would use ta, ma, sa, la before it
visage is masculin, so you would use ton, mon, son, le before it (among others)